How would you feel about having a male midwide

[Lardlizard]

Just interested in the points of view

Moralitym1n1

Well have to disagree on that one then as I genuinely believe that everyone’s experience is unique to them.

The point of fact is that no one has to come up with any reasons, any justifications or go round and round the houses to say ‘I want a female midwife’
It doesn’t matter why, and no one should ask them why.

I wouldn't have refused a male midwife, but I know that I would have been less relaxed. My Mum very strongly conditioned me and my sisters to think that women should acquiesce to men.
My dh would piss himself at that notion, but I think with a male midwife I would have inadvertently given head space to that conditioning and I might have been passive, but inwardly anxious, at a time when my own and my baby's needs should have been paramount. I know that's my issue, but I think it's the case for some women of my generation.

There is a large proportion of women who will not refuse a male MW, or other unwanted intrusions and interventions purely because they are in a vulnerable position.

It's a decision that should be made on a meta basis, like protection of other women's and children's spaces,e.g. refuge, prison...

The point of fact is that no one has to come up with any reasons, any justifications or go round and round the houses to say ‘I want a female midwife’
It doesn’t matter why, and no one should ask them why.

This thread is about a hypothetical male midwife; I have no idea if the op is referring to male, end of .. or to mtf transgender people. (Maybe I'm going down that route because it's such a dominant topic on this board at this time). If ops question includes mtf transgender health care workers, it seems like we will be made to debate why we wouldn't want a male/biologically male/male bodied midwife attending us.

...or in a coercive environment... [to accede to such impositions].

The more that women make historical complaints of being put into such situations coercively without actively wanting it the more forced the NHS will be to finally put a real spotlight on the practices currently going under the radar.

Why is being subject to a male MW any different in terms of consent and chaperoning?

it seems like we will be made to debate why we wouldn't want a male/biologically male/male bodied midwife attending us.

This is about male MWs, and has been,all the way through.

Male. - as in regardless of how they 'present' or want to ID. Male.

There is a large proportion of women who will not refuse a male MW, or other unwanted intrusions and interventions purely because they are in a vulnerable position

And what is at risk at the moment is, not in obstetrics, but in gynae where women would refuse smear tests if they were forced to have them carried out by a male practitioner. Shocking how many women would rather risk their health by not having one. They shouldn’t ever be put in this position.

I had 2 male midwives. Both absolutely brilliant. I've seen a lot of male Drs too who have been great too. The nurse who does the chaperone thing usually chats to me which is a nice distraction.

“,The nurse who does the chaperone thing usually chats to me which is a nice distraction.”

Aww. Lovely little job for her. Bit of pin money.........

I think it's reasonable but I wouldn't have wanted it.

Wyis every post supporting male.MWs coming with a glowing report of their abilities? It's irrelevant.

Again, this thread isnt about rating the abilities of male v female.midwives, that's really clear!

It's about having the opposite sex around you intimately as a woman!

If women are to get an improved life and level of opportunity, we do need to see through the dynamics. [the female exists to support the male to have access to the female (what a preposterous waste of resources frankly, just so men get access intimately to women)]

Also, having males on a birthing unit and trying to maintain the 'chaperoned' status is untenable.

Why have men working in an environment that requires doubling up on resources in a severely under-resourced NHS

The nurse is capable of multi-tasking by way of chatting and conducting the smear, etc.

My first preference would be for a midwife who has given birth themselves before. If that wasn’t an option then I would be happy with either a male or female midwife.

*This is about male MWs, and has been,all the way through.

Male. - as in regardless of how they 'present' or want to ID. Male.*

I was hoping Op would confirm/clarify.

In any case, out of interest do you (or any other posters) know offhand what the law is regarding male midwives or other workers dealing with 'intimate' body parts I.e. can a woman currently refuse? Do women have the right to be told/asked beforehand?

People have mentioned the very real possibility of feeling pressured and socialised to accede esp if it's sprung upon them.

Dinosauratemydaffodils I think we're actually in agreement. I was responding to a poster who said that in an emergency then no one would refuse a male HCP. Which is probably true in most cases. But to me a medical emergency isn't in any way equivalent to routine medical care.

My post was not intended as 'suck it up, it doesn't matter' although reading it back out of context I can see how it might appear that way.

I would be unhappy with a male midwife myself.

Since many years ago, RTFT, males were only catheterised by male nurses.

You have rights, yes.

It's not legal to force any medical intervention on anyone. Full rights of consent etc.

My first preference would be for a midwife who has given birth themselves before.

Here's hoping you aren't descended upon by the pack who's just criticised and questioned me for 2 pages for saying that 'out loud'.

Since many years ago, RTFT, males were only catheterised by male nurses.

I was catheterising male patients in the 1990s and I am female.

Not wanting a male to do an intimate exam or procedure on you is about safeguarding not preference.

Preferring a woman who's given birth, or is not a lesbian, or Jewish or whatever other things have been said on this thread is entirely different to safeguarding female bodied people from threat that some male bodied people pose.

Not wanting a male to do an intimate exam or procedure on you is about safeguarding not preference.

For some women it is about preference; they may not be concerned about being assaulted or touched inappropriately bit they still feel it is uncomfortable (not physically obviously) and would prefer a female.

I missed the Jewish & lesbian stuff - what?! .

Weird there's a tiny tiny number of male midwives in the country but a very high number of unfamiliar posters coming here's saying they had one and they were fab.

Now why would that be

Has anyone counted up the number of posters saying they have had a male midwife? Only I don't find it that unbelievable.

1 poster said she had one 30 years ago. How many babies does a midwife deliver per shift? Even if you guessed that male midwives deliver 1000 babies per year in total, going back over 30 years, I don't find even 100 posts on here unbelievable.

*Weird there's a tiny tiny number of male midwives in the country but a very high number of unfamiliar posters coming here's saying they had one and they were fab.

Now why would that be hmm*

I'm an unfamiliar poster to you I suspect. I read more than I post. I came in from seeing this on Active threads. Commented as it was something I had experience with and interested to hear what others thought.
Also, I didn't give birth in the UK.

Nothing here.

I'm unfamiliar as I've recently namechanged. Have been on MN for years though.