Feeling like I don’t want to use our local swimming pool

[Sunisshining3228]

Hello
I’m a lurker here. Just wanted to share something here.
I went swimming this morning at the pool in the area that we moved to not long ago. Haven’t swum for exercise for a while but used to love it when I was growing up and used to compete etc.
It was a unisex changing rooms. There were cubicles and lockers which meant a bit of privacy but the showers were two rows facing each other. Men were making good use of the showers, one older guy was giving himself a thorough soaping down but I didn’t notice any women lingering to use it. I felt pretty uncomfortable even pausing to rinse the chlorine off because it was not private. Not saying the men were out of order or anything but they were looking and I don’t want to feel looked at by a man when using a shower.
I had to go to work afterwards so needed to use the shower and wash my hair. I felt bad but told myself it was v early In the morning and I asked if I could use the disabled cubicle which has a shower. The pool attendant agreed but I felt bad for using it, I don’t have a disability.
I can kind of see why they designed the changing room this way as it would help mixed sex families and transgender people I guess, but it’s not great for women and adolescent girls. I used to train at a swimming club into my teens and was self conscious, I would have been really put off if our shower area was unisex. It has made me quite reluctant for my daughter to go in for swimming classes/clubs with a changing room like that as well to be honest.
Even drying my hair afterwards and putting on make up, opposite there was a guy drying his hair, probably innocuously looking around at the same time but it just made me want to hurry and get out of there.
I don’t know if I’ll complain cos we just moved here and this seems to be how it is here but I’ll probably re-think swimming again.
It feels like changing rooms have not been designed with women in mind unless we used the disabled cubicle.
Does that mean that being a woman who is uncomfortable about being looked at by men is a disability now?

slipper if only it was that quick and discreet. The one and only time I walked into one of these changing rooms, there were at least four men walking around stark naked, completely unconcerned, no towels or rush to cover up, one naked man was in front of a mirror doing something to his hair. It wasn't so much the fact that I would have been quickly in and out of there, it was more the fact of entering a enclosed separate space with many naked men and no way to avoid being in close proximity. I would rather have no changing rooms at all and everyone just change in the open by the side of the pool rather than a mixed changing room behind a closed door.

Effectively, there are underwater cameras that monitor swimmers.

Useful for prosecuting sexual assaults, “heavy petters” and pool wankers as well as finding drowning swimmers quickly, I’d imagine. Creepy as fuck though, because who knows what happens to the footage once its hoovered up in the cloud.

Not sure I would like fully communal showering. Our local pool has communal changing area with a mixture of single cubicles, cubicles with change table and a couple of family cubicles but, with the exception of three showers that are only really used to rinse on the way into/out of the pool, the showers are all also in individual cubicles. So far I haven't found it intimidating and like the family aspect when we swim as a family.

Actually I haven't made it clear, it was communal showers but you got dressed in cubicles. I suppose as we were on holiday it was very convenient for us as a family to shower and dress together.

Fully communal mixed sex showers are pretty unusual. I'm familiar with changing areas that are mixed sex but not open communal showers in a mixed sex environment. I can't imagine many women who'd be comfortable with that. And what about if you take young children with you to the pool?

The pool I take my children to has mixed sex changing rooms but the showers and changing room cubicles are all private with doors you can lock. That's totally fine with me. Having communal showers with not even a curtain you can pull across for privacy sounds awful to me.

I doubt anyone is looking at you as much as you think

Bollocks.

Two young men I know admitted to watching Wimbledon for 2 hours with the pause button just trying to pause it right to catch a glimpse of the female tennis stars' knickers.

This is a relatively benign example of men fetishising women.

Most men watch porn. Many watch pretty nasty porn.

Believe me, if you soap yourself in the shower, there's someone looking.

Recently DH and I were visiting family and took our DDs to their local pool. I was quite surprised that the entire changing area was mixed sex. I was even more surprised that I actually liked the set up- they had dozens and dozens of cubicles of varying sizes and there were no benches or open areas so as to dissuade people from changing outside the cubicles; there were even 'no nudity' signs up. All the showers were private cubicles as well. It felt very safe, like an extension of being in the pool area itself. I thought it was a good model for a unisex changing area if this is the route we are now going down.

Responses to threads like this piss me off so much.

My fridge is full so I can't understand why people need foodbanks.

My pool is fine so I don't see the problem.

I don't mind men wanking off to me so you shouldn't either.

So many women are traitors to their sex and they don't even realise it.

Our local pool has a changing village which is mixed sex. There are some communal showers but these are only meant to be used to wash before going in the pool. There are also some showers in cubicles, but these are also mixed sex and the doors and partitions are not floor to ceiling. There are signs up to say you’re not allowed to walk around naked or use the communal showers naked.
There is also the option to join so you can also use the gym, and then you can access single sex changing rooms, but this starts at about £20 per month, and these are mainly communal with only 2 cubicles.

I wonder as well how many girls there are at the swimming club there. The facilities are good, there’s a 50m pool and I think the club has good coaching too.
I was in a swimming club when I was younger, we competed regionally etc. There was about a 50:50 split of boys and girls I think. With these changing rooms I can’t imagine many girls feel comfortable as the reach the age of puberty. I wonder if this will have an impact on women’s participation in this sport in the future.

The lack of privacy is why I don’t swim.

@slippermaiden I have also used this pool for family swimming before, the mixed sex element wasn’t so bad. Using the changing rooms as a single adult woman early morning before work, with majority single adult men around me was a different experience

I have been using Mixed changing rooms for a long time, and I have to say, I have never seen naked men walking around ,unconcerned‘ as you say Xia, in my area they are much more reserved and conscious nobody sees ‚their bits‘. It would be considered rude. I get why single sex options are important and I am for it, but considering your description it also has a lot to do with men‘s general attitudes, how uncomfortable mixed changing rooms are.

Absolutely appalled by you using the disabled shower.

Most of the pools around here have unisex cubicle changing and unisex showers. Noone walks around naked. Never had a problem with a man showering in them. Never had a problem using them.

Please don't pass your insecurities onto the next generation. And leave the disabled shower for those who actually need the extra facilities a disabled shower offers

Well, Green, shouldn‘t you be addressing men instead and ask them not to pass on male violence to the next generation? Pretty sure that could end those ‚insecurities‘ rather quickly.

Our local pool is unisex. Loads of changing rooms, I have never once seen anyone wandering around naked. Everyone uses them. It's fine. They open onto the actual pool so are very open. The showers are communal and are actually poolside so everyone can see but no one takes their costumes off of course.

I've used them for years and never had an issue.

Well guess I should move to your area deep and everyone else who never has had a problem. When I got home and told DH he said that men's changing rooms are always full of men walking around naked and said was I sure I hadn't accidentally walked into the gents. Basically the mixed changing room had become the de-facto gents.

Interesting that everyone else's pools have "no nudity" signs up, that's clearly what we need!!

Maybe on a weekend or afternoon with families it's much better, I would be fine going in there if there were plenty of other women in there too and I bet fewer men walk around naked when surrounded by families.

I complained to a local pool as I was frequently squicked out by the old boys in the openish showers (cubicle but doorless) vigorously soaping inc hand inside speedoes for aaaages. Like you say they're not doing owt wrong probably enjoying the free hot water and why not but I can't feel relaxed in my cossie in the shower next door.

deepwatersolo

Perhaps we should be banning relationships and marriage as woman are far more likely to experience violence and abuse in those than a leisure centre changing room?

I'm not responsible for male violence. Neither is the man who is taking a shower. The man who is violent is responsible for his violence. Let's punish that and not confuse all the issues.

I'm far more concerned that the woman's rights is frequently ends up shoving disabled people under a bus. "I'm insecure about showering in a mixed environment so I'll make use adapted facilitates" is a classic example.

If I was the campaigning sort, I'd be campaigning for disabled rights. There is so far we as a society need to go.

I hate unisex change areas (a man once put his head under my cubicle and I have avoided them since).

My pool has women only changing, but it’s a bit cold and a bit grim. I take flip flops and dart across the lobby in my swimsuit and a big towel and use the showers/change area that are near the gym part of the leisure centre instead.

Is this an option for you OP?

I'm not responsible for male violence.

Given that you berate a woman for her 'insecurities' while turning a blind eye to the material reality that makes those 'insecurities' justified, you clearly are.

My local council (against very strong public opposition) knocked down our swimming baths and rebuilt a new pool which has communal changing rooms and showers. The showers are also in full view of the spectator area. I won't use that pool and neither will anyone else I know.

The next town over has communal changing rooms with cubicles and individual shower cubicles which is much more appropriate.

Our leisure centre is mixed changing and showers with cubicles. I dont mind in general, but it might be worth you checking out the womens sessions

deepwatersolo

Does ignoring any reference in my post to the difficulties of living with disability make you responsible for violence suppression and difficulties of living with disability?

No

Don't be ridiculous.

Then again if you approve of someone using the adapted facilitates who doesn't need them, then actually you are a way bigger part of the problem of discrimination against disabilities than I am a part of the problem of male violence....

I think many men would also feel uncomfortable showering with women present as well. There should be private cubicles where you can get naked and was all your bits.

It’s also terribly unfair for disabled people. It’s like the trans debate isn’t it? No proper facilities for trans so they get to step all over women’s spaces, but what happens to these women? In your case what happens to disabled people who want to change?