Writing from Twitter prison!

[Glinner]

I've received a twelve-hour ban from Twitter so I thought I'd take the chance to say hello lovely mumsnetters! Thank you for all the support and kind words and very proud to be on your side.

I'm not deleting the tweets because I stand by them and there's nothing offensive about them. See for thyself, fellow witches!

Twitter

That strange topsy turvy world. That upside down creation.

I read this today. They got me right. I do believe gay sex involves penises.

Fig rolls are a crime against humanity.

How does gay sex work if there’s no penis action?

Ahem. Fig rolls never hurt anyone except fig wasps. The same applies to weetabix. Leave them alone you nasty wimmin! #nodebate

Now I've cleared that up I'll stop derailing the thread.

Souls have penis too.
I think my catchphrases need some work.
Weetabix have souls. Weetabix have penis.
Have lost the thread a bit here but feel I am still making more sense than Layla Moran.

birds you should stand for parliament!

birds you have my vote. Anyone who centres Weetabix in their politics wins for me. Don't let that bloody Lang gnaw at you with her banana bollocks, we must stand firm against Weetabix abuse.

I'm sorry, I can't condone hot milk in any context. It's unspeakable. I'm more malleable on the Tunnocks debate. I go with wafer, teacake, snowball, log, in that order. Fig rolls are an also-ran. I'll just add, for the hell of it, that there's no excuse for the Oreo.

Death to Oreos. Pass, friend.

there's no excuse for the Oreo

That's something we can agree upon

Im waiting for the backlash.

Lang where do you stand on banana flavoured weetabix? Personally I quite like weetabix, warm milk and chopped banana, but mashed? No.
And Fig rolls are useful as a medicinal product.

I don't care about Zoflora or loo brushes but it is vitally important to me (and nobody else because they are all heretics here) that you take a position on the Weetabix + mashed banana + hot milk issue. Yay? Or nay? (If it isn't yay, I'll take all your Tunnocks).

My earliest food memories involve gagging on mushy Weetabix on a regular basis. It was a relief the get to the stage where I had words and could shout “no!” Your Weetabix-banana-hot milk combo is TRIGGERING for me, LangCleg and should be accompanied with a warning.

Man I am so late to this thread.

And I'm so sorry for everyone's rudeness, Glinner. No one has even been polite enough to ask you your pronouns in 27 pages of comments. Mine are she/her/fuck off.

Tunnocks. Those chocolate and wafer things in the red and gold foil?

Gawj

I'm sorry, I can't condone hot milk in any context.

You're dead to me.

In fact, all of you dreadful Weetabixphobes are dead to me.

Tunnocks. Those chocolate and wafer things in the red and gold foil?

The blue ones are better.

Hot milk on cornflakes is beyond the pits.

I would much rather have had it on Weetabix (or not at all, with its slimy skin)

Being given a fig roll and told it's a biscuit is like being given a mint and told it's a sweet.

#deathtofigrolls

Mine are she/her/fuck off.

Perfect, succinct and memorable.
I am still holiness/majesty but I much admire yours.
Brava.

How are the blue ones different to the red ones melamin I only ever had a red one.

Weetabix, honey and hot milk is fab.

It does set to the consistency of concrete however, and requires a jackhammer or three weeks soaking to remove if not caught in time.

I’ve never tried banana. langcleg if you’re into unorthodox banana cuisine may I recommend cheese and banana on toast?

Cheese and banana on toast sounds like nursery food for a furry.
Off to bleach my mind.