little things you do each day that are a tiny bit feminist

[speakingwoman]

They can be big, or small, or misfire even....

Here's mine.
I'm working from home, on a call to a colleague. The doorbell rings.
I answer it still on the phone. It's a friend of my husband's. I ineptly signal him in and beckon husband in from garden whilst continuing call.

Once off phone, I pop into to kitchen say hi and apologise for my inept/stumbling signals saying "I'm no good at multi-tasking."

He replies "I'm not either.... but I'm a man....." and then looks a bit confused. He knows there's something askance about what I said and he's waiting for me to rescue him.

I don't. I don't qualify my statement that when engaged in work I find it difficult to simulteneously perform a domestic favour for my husband. I smile and leave.

It's small, it's crap, it's nothing really but it's done now and if another woman says it to him he might just begin to wonder whether multi-tasking really is something that women have to do but he doesn't.

I don't think there is anything wrong with complimenting a girl's dress, as long it's weighed up by showing that she is valued for other things than her looks.

Got sick of apologizing for everything. I am still working on it. I don't want to keep minimizing myself with "just", either.

I notice that I'm always compensating for men's lack (or disinterest) of social skills. I am trying to relax even when there is shudder awkward silences and situations.

Promoting great books/tv-series etc by and/or about interesting women to people.

Making many subtle gender critical comments in real life discussions - people generally agree.

I hate physical contact with strangers on public transportation but won't let man spreaders intrude on my space. Bags are good for this, and sharp elbows.

Challenging sexist "banter".

I don't think there is anything wrong with complimenting a girl's dress, as long it's weighed up by showing that she is valued for other things than her looks.

Of course not, but I reckon there are soooooo many people lining up to tell my nieces (I only have boys, no girls) how pretty they are there's no harm in me trying to balance things out a bit by complementing them on something else instead.

And for boys I do sometimes focus on their appearance. I know one of my sons sometimes says he is ugly so I can see it's worth boosting boys' self esteem in that department sometimes.

A colleague was, in a very well intentioned way, complimenting the daughter (about 7 yo) of another colleague - nice hair, nice dress, nice shoes. It is well intentioned but it pained me ever so slightly. I started asking what she'd been up to for the holidays so far, the focus shifted and it gave us all a good chance to tell her how well she'd done, very brave and clever, don't think I could have done that and so on. A tiny win.

I went to a wedding of a middle-aged couple where she'd been married before and still used her ex's surname, but the invitations were written using her maiden name. It said at the bottom "The bride, formerly known as [married name with ex-husband] is returning to her maiden name." When I asked her about it she said, "I've had enough fooling around with names and being Mrs. I'll finish up the way I started."

@TeiTetua I like that - very no-nonsense!

MnerXX I wouldn't bother changing to men's deodorant it doesn't seem to work as well as women's.
My husband will only wear the women's dove cream stick as he says it keeps him sweat free for longer