"Planning my wedding as a non-binary bride"

[53rdWay]

www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2018/jun/05/planning-my-wedding-as-a-non-binary-bride

"When I walk down the aisle this time, in front of every person who knows me, it will be as someone who lives in their body. Not a bride on a cake, but as myself, a person who is too complicated for the simple rituals that are the pattern of our lives."

Unlike the rest of us, who are 100% cool with compulsory femininity and aren't nearly complicated enough to be more than cake-decoration brides!

It's annoying but I feel more sorry for her than anything. This, e.g.:

“I’m in a body that isn’t saying the right things. It’s not me,” I explained. “I feel like I’m wearing a rubber suit all the time and nobody can see me inside it.”

Welcome to living with a female body under patriarchy! Join the feminists who are trying to bring the system down for everybody, not just the few special souls who are Not Like The Other Girls.

Oh good grief why is narcissism dressed up as a brave and groundbreaking “ identity “ now ?
EVERYONE IS NON BINARY, EVERYONE, YOU HALF WITTED TWERP
WEAR WHAT YOU LIKE , NO ONE CARES, IT IS ONLY CLOTHES.

I’ve been up since the small hours with puking daughter, I may be more shouty than normal.

I want to look completely sleek. Elegant

Isn't "elegant" a classic look for wedding dresses? Type into Google "elegant" and one of the suggestions is "wedding dresses"... She is starting to sound not that special...

Also, elegant is often associated with being feminine? Seems that way when looking the word up.

(sorry only just getting through to actually reading the article now, blood boiling a bit so ranting on here!)

SirVixofVixHall hope your daughter gets well soon! and you get some sleep

Too complex to be a handmaiden like the rest of us.

Fuck off!

So basically "queer" equals "narcissistic personality disorder". Maybe they can create a narc pride flag.

I was a hexadecimal bride ...

LOL, perfect execution of 'non-binary'!

"When I walk down the aisle this time, in front of every person who knows me, it will be as someone who lives in their body. Not a bride on a cake, but as myself, a person who is too complicated for the simple rituals that are the pattern of our lives."

Poor woman, I can't begin to imagine her struggle. I thank my lucky stars that I was in the fortunate position of being no more than a cake topper bride on my wedding day, with no personality of my own. That's cis privilege for you!

I'm baffled.
Woman marries man who turns out to be a bit possessive/controlling/not what she wants. They split up.
Woman feels unfeminine so she wears trousers a lot.
Woman meets new man who loves her for what's inside rather than outside. They get married. She doesn't want a frilly dress.
And the Guardian thinks that's print-worthy? Really?

PS these are the best dresses (and best men)

I had a big dress and I bloody loved it! And guess what? I was still a complicated person on the inside just a complicated human being in my big dress. Perhaps I will write an article about how a wedding dress doesn’t define you as a human being and everyone can revel in this new found and unique perspective.

What a pile of nonsense that article was. I gave up after 30 seconds.

However, I'm loving the pictures of Grace Kelly. The blue dress with the flowery skirt was my favourite though I love the first green dress.

Thanks Lass

EVERYONE IS NON BINARY, EVERYONE, YOU HALF WITTED TWERP
WEAR WHAT YOU LIKE , NO ONE CARES, IT IS ONLY CLOTHES.

Exactly what I was thinking. Except I have no excuse at all for being shouty. I am quite old though.

Bugger, bold fail.

I also love the picture of Ed and Yvette. Her dress was stunning!

I think she is someone who wants to be part of the LGBTQIetc community but is, sadly for her, an entirely conventional boring old heterosexual. How dull. So she is taking the very ordinary sentiments that all women feel living under patriarchy and extenuating them into ‘queerness’. By her standards, I could consider myself ‘queer’ because I don’t like to present as conventionally female all the time. Very few women I know do.

This line about dating men so she could borrow their clothes is nonsense. You mean she can’t find jeans and t-shirts to wear anywhere else but in her dates’ closets?!? It’s not 1872, for goodness sake, with men and women going to separate tailors and milliners to wear heavily gendered clothes.

And yes, her posturing is an insult to actual gay people who have had to fight for their rights back when the word ‘queer’ was a slur, not a trendy bandwagon to jump on.

All I can say is, god bless her uncle Brian. That man has the patience of a saint.

I started reading the article and spotted this...

@The ring was a thick band of beaten platinum, set with dozens of diamonds in a pinprick design of a mountain range. I took it from him and slipped it on. Charlie smiled at me.

“It’s perfect,” I said.

“I wanted something that you didn’t have to take off to punch someone,” he joked. “Something tough and beautiful at the same time.”

I am not bothered what this person wears to their wedding.

I also read the bit where she goes to see him at work in a denim dress. It read like a Mills and Boon.

I've read enough.

Enjoy your wedding day.

I still don't understand how she thinks she's a dyke? She doesn't appear to have ever had relationships with women.

What a baffling ridiculous article.

SHE IS NOT LIKE OTHER GIRLS.

None of us are....

One of my close (heterosexual) friends wore a trouser suit to her wedding. She looked amazing. No one gave it any thought other than to say how original and beautiful it was. No. one. cared.

Honestly given how much many people dislike even attending weddings, I'd say as long as you feed people well and don't drag them miles from home, you could wear pretty much anything these days and it would have zero importance.

The narcissism reeks!

exactly JessicaEccles

Who are these "other girls" anyway and why is she comparing herself to children rather than adults, surely she should at least be saying how she isn't like other women

What a load of self indulgent crap.

I got married in trousers and (wait for it) DH wore his kilt! He even twirled

I think we trans/non binary better than she did

AbsolutelyBeginning
Lass excellent work

Welcome to living with a female body under patriarchy! Join the feminists who are trying to bring the system down for everybody, not just the few special souls who are Not Like The Other Girls.

Hear, hear!

I've read the article, I now have a headache and I am very confused. Please explain someone before I need medication.

Bloody good point, Twaddle. Scottish men marry in kilts, who knew they were Enby genderqueer demibois? DP will be tickled to hear he's a dyke.

Do people like this ever grow up i wonder?
And will the Guardian ever stop publishing this rubbish?