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Original poster

Barber in Worcester refuses to cut any woman's hair

195 replies

chocolatesun · 20/04/2018 10:31

Sorry this is long but better to give the full story, I think.

A few months ago I popped into a local trendy looking barber in Worcester to have my three year old daughter's hair trimmed. When I asked if they cut children's hair the staff said they wouldn't cut her hair because she is a girl. Something like,'we don't cut girls' hair'. I was taken aback and embarrassed but left without making a fuss.

It did bother me, though, so I called back later to clarify and specifically asked whether they wouldn't cut her hair because: (a) she is female or (b) because they don't/can't do girl's hairstyles. The staffed confirmed it was (a). I said their refusal to cut her hair because she is female is in breach of the equalities act (if it was to do with their training and ability to cut her hair, that would be different). The staff member suggested I call back to speak to the owner.

When I called again to speak to the business owner he was incredibly rude and confirmed they do not cut females' hair. He told me they were barbers and said I should go look up the meaning of barber in the dictionary. He also called me sweetheart! He was utterly misogynistic.

His attitude took me by surprise as I'd assumed the staff had just got it wrong and had been expecting a polite call and maybe an apology from the owner.

Although I was fuming I dropped the entire thing because with a baby and a three year old I really have enough to deal with. I didn't even tell him off for calling me sweetheart as I felt he was spoiling for a fight. However I've just seen that it is is now shortlisted for the MOBAA barber awards for customer service!!

What do mumsnetters think, should I drop this completely on the basis that not every battle needs to be fought? Or am I being pathetic for letting the bully barber win?

OP posts:
ArcheryAnnie · 20/04/2018 11:58

Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar me, when I was in my twenties! (I am no longer in my twenties.)

DisturblinglyOrangeScrambleEgg · 20/04/2018 11:58

Who are all these women with short back and sides?

I was sat behind a woman with a hair cut identical to my eldest son's yesterday. At work, more than one woman has that undercut style that's going around on both men and women. I myself have both had a buzz cut, and something more akin to the traditional short back and sides when younger (that is a proper one, like from the 60s, not the shorter at the bottom, longer on top thing that most men have these days)

crunchymint · 20/04/2018 11:58

Lesbians I know. Simply because you don't know women with this hair cut does not mean it does not exist. I can count off the top of my head 5 friends who have this haircut, and they all complain about hairdressers trying to feminise the haircut.
Glad you find it funny though.

Sarahjconnor · 20/04/2018 11:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Roussette · 20/04/2018 12:00

What a bonkers thread! Next minute we'll have a bride going into a barbers asking for an intricate up-do!

I think he was right to say look up what a barbers actually is.

crunchymint · 20/04/2018 12:08

Don't be daft. The issue is not with barbers refusing to do complicated traditional hair cuts for women. The issue is barbers refusing to cut women's hair in the same style as a man's, simply because she is a woman.

hackmum · 20/04/2018 12:08

Hairdressers do seem to be a bit of an anomaly in terms of equalities legislation. I know there are some exemptions that allow you to offer a service to only one sex - I imagine hair is one of them.

Years ago a lawyer friend of mine said it would only be a matter of time before a woman sued a hairdresser for differential pricing between men and women. (My DP and I use the same hairdresser, and we both have short hair; my haircut costs a lot more than his.) But it doesn't seem to have happened yet.

ParisUSM · 20/04/2018 12:09

I used to get my hair cut in a barbers because I had a flattop and two of the barbers specialised in them. Would've been raging if they had told me it was for men only! Some mad comments on here, I really do not get MN

Pratchet · 20/04/2018 12:11

Everybody saying this is nonsense: I trust you all accept that sex segregated spaces are a right for women that should not be abrogated?

Rufustheconstantreindeer · 20/04/2018 12:13

Agree that if the barber says men only then its men only

There are other barbers....if there were none at all that cut female hair then that would be more of an issue

And yes...no difference between male and female hair, just the cut

crunchymint · 20/04/2018 12:14

Sex segregated spaces are allowed legally for certain purposes. I doubt that cutting hair qualifies.
If it was a massage therapist only giving massages to men, that would be fair enough.

FlaviaAlbia · 20/04/2018 12:14

Pratchet reading your posts on this thread you appear to be arguing for both sides in different posts...

charlestonchaplin · 20/04/2018 12:17

OP doesn't even say her daughter has short hair just that she (OP) thinks it is 'so easy'. If it is so easy you can do it yourself can't you? It is best not to annoy people by telling them them their job is so easy that you, a layperson, know how to do it better than they do.

If you wanted a recognised 'male' haircut I would sympathise with you but I think you probably wanted a hairdresser service (a lot more discussion and fuss) in a barber's.

crunchymint · 20/04/2018 12:19

Christ I have female friends who have short back and sides haircuts who are way way less fussy about their hair than many men.

Rufustheconstantreindeer · 20/04/2018 12:19

Boys do have long hair

Especially some little boys

Ds2 had a number 2 when he was tiny...he looked adorable (nothing to do with the question...but honestly, adorable)

RosenbergW · 20/04/2018 12:21

Have no idea what is going on in this thread! A barber's is not a 'male only space' legally or otherwise. No doubt mums sit in them waiting for younguns getting haircuts all the time.

The only thing that should be relevant is "can they do the style you want"?

I used to get my hair cut in a barber's regularly. It cost me £5-10 and I'd leave the same amount as as tip, which would still work out well less than paying at a "ladies" hairdressers. I had short cuts and didn't care if it looked dainty or winsome, I wanted it short and cheap and easy to look after. No problem.

I hate paying ridiculous amounts of money more than men for haircuts that are basically the same as the ones they're having. Fair enough if you want to sit there for a hour and have it all blowdryed and styled etc, but Id rather not. I'm happy to tip if I like what they did and they weren't rude/annoying while they did it.

This is not waxing someone's genitalia or doing something similarly intimate. It's chopping hair on someone's head. There is no good reason why a barber should refuse to cut a girl/woman's hair if she is happy with his repertoire of styles and his prices.

Original poster
chocolatesun · 20/04/2018 12:21

Hackmum

The exemption for hairdressers and barbers applies if the hairstyle is outside their training. It is unlawful to refuse solely on the grounds of gender. This is why I called the barber, to clarify and because I thought the staff just made a mistake. There's no sign in the window saying male only or anything like that.

What is interesting (and what I hadn't understood- must have missed the memo!) is that some barbers seem to want to create a male space. Technically that is unlawful but not something I'm planning to take further.

I agree with those who say it's not worth pursuing.

OP posts:
Mookatron · 20/04/2018 12:23

The insurance thing is rubbish.

If they said 'no kids' I understand but 'no girls'? Not on. Also why shouldn't a woman have a 'man's' hair cut? It's all made up anyway!!

I think you are right. I wouldn't pursue it though as it'll only raise your blood pressure. If be asking my H not to give them his custom however.

crunchymint · 20/04/2018 12:25

I have a traditional woman's hair cut, but a pretty short easy to look after one. I always just get a dry cut. And still they insist on spending ages blow drying or tonging into a more feminine look. I hate it and just want to go. I would love to be in and out in 10 minutes.

DisturblinglyOrangeScrambleEgg · 20/04/2018 12:27

I hate it and just want to go. I would love to be in and out in 10 minutes

Oh God yes, this is why I've given in and chop my own. I've been to the hairdressers 4 times in my life. Each time it took around 2 hours, of which the actual cutting was a very small amount. If it takes that long to do everything else in order to make this a useable hair style, then it's definitely not the style for me!

Billben · 20/04/2018 12:27

I used to go to the barbers for years to have a trim. And my hair has always been long. Only went when I saw they weren’t busy, so I guessed for 10 minutes work&chat my money is just as good as any male’s. Never been refused.

bumblingbovine49 · 20/04/2018 12:31
user1471433035 · 20/04/2018 12:32

As a man, I like to have the option of going to a barber that is men only sometimes. I would not think of entering a female only space.
Barbers are a poor man's psychologist where we can go and vent our problems without being judged. The relationship between man and barber is as close as person to lawyer.
Please respect our rights for a male safe space where we can share our problems in a setting we find comfortable.
As for the point on Barbers being cheaper that is not the Barbers fault but the other hairdressers out there who are charging to much.

FlaviaAlbia · 20/04/2018 12:33

You should do it crunchy mint, it's brilliant. For me it's £12 and 15 mins instead of at least £35 and an hour. Plus there's no cringy head massage during a hair wash Smile

crunchymint · 20/04/2018 12:34

Except barbers are not male only space. Mums take boys in after all.

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