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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

The age of the sex dolls

107 replies

cinematique · 20/02/2018 11:10

Someone sent me a link to this 'sex doll brothel' in Glasgow; I thought it was an isolated phenomenon but apparently there's more cropping up, in Paris also of all places! They are very expensive and look a lot more realistic than those plastic dolls with a hole for a mouth!
I don't know whether to be relieved that someone will shag a doll instead of treating a woman as such, or despair at the state of societal disfunction...
www.glasgowlive.co.uk/news/glasgow-news/uks-first-sex-doll-brothel-14274617

OP posts:
Patodp · 20/02/2018 17:16

What makes them' pathetic', Patodp? Genuine question

The word "wanker" comes to mind.
That masturbating is so important he will go to such effort and pay money to writhe around with a plastic doll.

All men who excessively masterbate are rather pathetic imo.

Patodp · 20/02/2018 17:17

(Genuine reply)

ArcheryAnnie · 20/02/2018 17:25

Oh and taking a flesh light to a country that needs aid is questionable to say the least.

I'd genuinely be interested in why you think this, Elendon, as I suspect we agree on much else. My initial reaction was positive - a man, on packing to spend an extended period of time in a desperately poor community, thought ahead about his own sexual wants, and how he could manage them for himself. I liked that, as I thought a man who expected to spend time with his own right hand, and had actively planned for that in his own personal packing, would be less likely to prey on local women and children. (I could be wrong, but that was my first reaction.)

ArcheryAnnie · 20/02/2018 17:27

Patodp my objection to the dolls isn't about wanking (which I don't have any problem with anyone doing), but with how they view women. I really hate that this is what they think women are: just an empty woman-shaped container useful to ejaculate into.

thedancingbear · 20/02/2018 17:28

All men who excessively masterbate are rather pathetic imo.

Have a day off, will you?

Elendon · 20/02/2018 17:30

Perhaps he might want to stop doing things whilst out there - who would have an appetite or the energy for sex whilst helping people survive. It can be done. Besides ArcheryAnne how is he going to clean the fleshlight especially if there is a water shortage/crisis. Is he expecting a room of his own, given that in an aid crisis shelter is one of the top priorities?

Smacks of entitlement to me.

Patodp · 20/02/2018 17:32

Are you sure men who use the dolls actually think they are women?

Elendon · 20/02/2018 17:32

Oh and being in possession of a fleshlight doesn't mean you are one of the good guys who will leave women and children 'alone'.

Patodp · 20/02/2018 17:33

I think men know they aren't real women. It's a really elaborate wank.

caroldecker · 20/02/2018 17:45

Elendon Most westerners going to crisis situations use the majority of the aid budget renting the best houses for themselves and ensuring they have plenty of nice food. One of the reasons Haiti is still a hellhole despite £14 billion of aid funding.

Agerbilatemycardigan · 20/02/2018 17:45

Oh God - just Googled fleshlight. There was a green one with teeth Envy

Elendon · 20/02/2018 17:51

Thanks caroldecker I once knew a reporter who liked to go out to disaster areas.

I hosted some members from Greenpeace in my home once for a conference. They were most grateful. It was entirely voluntary but they gave us good presents - not a fleshlight I hasten to add - vodka!

HairyBallTheorem · 20/02/2018 17:54

I wonder if our "have sympathy for the poor men who are too inadequate to get consensual sex" poster realises that the majority of punters are in fact perfectly attractive (at a superficial level), successful men, often with partners. They go to prostitutes because they want to, not because they have to. Where "want to" covers a huge variety of less-than-savoury motives (domination, sexual acts their partners don't want, a feeling of entitlement, a belief that women are objects for men's sexual gratification) which I am more than happy to pass judgement on. And my considered judgement is that these men are fucking scum.

thedancingbear · 20/02/2018 18:12

I'm certainly not defending men going to prostitutes, HairyBallTheorem - broadly speaking, I'd agree with you.

A doll is a substantially different proposition, though, surely?

Nuffaluff · 20/02/2018 18:25

What if prostitution was abolished completely?
If there were just these robots that men could abuse instead of real women?
That could happen in the future as robots become increasingly more realistic.

ArcheryAnnie · 20/02/2018 19:19

Oh and being in possession of a fleshlight doesn't mean you are one of the good guys who will leave women and children 'alone'.

I know that, Elendon, it was just my first reaction.

But I think the "no energy or appetite for sex while helping people survive" thing is a bit ridiculous. People remain human even in terrible circumstances, and still want all sorts of things. And nobody is entitled to sex from any other person, so someone arranging to have comfortable sex with themselves seemed to me to be a good thing. (Even if it's not my thing.)

Elendon · 20/02/2018 19:26

But I think the "no energy or appetite for sex while helping people survive" thing is a bit ridiculous

ArcheryAnne No it's not. Polar expeditions mean months away from family and a restraint on sexual interaction without the need for religion or chemicals believe it or not. Do you believe that the women scientists who are there are at risk if the men they work with don't bring a fleshlight with them?

UpABitLate · 20/02/2018 19:39

The jury is out the last I read on whether child sex dolls would be useful in treating paedophiles.

Seems to be divided opinion
One group saying if they have the dolls they don't need to offend
Other group saying it reinforces the behaviour and everntually won't be enough

I imagine the same is true of an idea that dolls might protect actual women. My feeling is that most men want a reaction from a human.

Article recently had a man who asked whether it could cope with being beaten and thrown down the stairs. Another in the news had a "frigid farrah" setting.

I think the novelty won't last - real humans are available, cheap, and come in all shapes and sizes (and ages), and their body parts act like actual body parts whether it's being warm, soft or breaking and bleeding.

I don;t see these giving respite for prostituted people TBH.

On the subject I was reading the news the other day and a teenage girl had been abducted, drugged and they put an advert and pimped her for days, she was found after about a week. In that time she had had quite a number of men come and rape her, presumably after answering an ad about prostitution. She was very young and would have been distressed, and was drugged. None of these men contacted the police and it certainly seems as if they all went ahead and got their moneys worth. The idea that men who pay for sex are just normal nice men who can't get a partner for whatever reason or are just too busy or whatever, time after time stories come out that show that the men simply do not care and are happy to rape and don't even make an anonymous tipoff. That tells you something, and not something good.

UpABitLate · 20/02/2018 19:41

IF you could make it so that all prostituion was sex dolls then that would be great

But I don't think men would like that very much.

ArcheryAnnie · 20/02/2018 19:57

Elendon I think even people who work in the Arctic may well have a sneaky wank in their sleeping bags.

I don't think fleshlights - or any other sex aids - stop predatory or abusive men from being predatory or abusive. But I do think that a man who has thought about how he will take care of his own sexual wants (I won't write needs, because sex isn't a need, it's a want) without bothering anyone else is a good thing.

Elendon · 20/02/2018 20:02

Regarding further discussions with you on this ArcheryAnne

I can't be bothered.

ArcheryAnnie · 20/02/2018 20:03

I mean, "men who have fleshlights aren't necessarily awful" is not the hill I intend to die on, but I do think sex aids that don't look like humans are in a different category from sex aids that do. If I found a new partner owned a fleshlight, I might be a bit put off, but if I found a new partner owned a sex doll, I'd move house and take out a restraining order.

UpABitLate · 20/02/2018 20:38

I bet there's some shagging in those artic camps though.

Must get very dull when they're snowed in all winter.

SophoclesTheFox · 20/02/2018 20:38

I get what you're saying ArcheryAnne.

I'm not sure how we're supposed to find the studies about how diverting violent men towards venting their sexual anger and aggression onto prostitutes rather than "respectable" women anything other than horrific.

And I've never bought the idea of the prostitute as a sort of sex-therapist for men who can't be expected to find a girlfriend due to social skills or disability - again this idea that it's OK to expect there to be a sex class of women to mop up what "respectable" women can't expected to tolerate. What do disabled women and women with poor social skills do, then? Is there a sex class of men to cater for their sexual needs?

Nuffaluff · 20/02/2018 20:39

upabit
Yes I agree with you actually. I was trying to imagine some future utopia where prostitution is replaced with sex robots but it would never happen.
I don’t understand why the world is the way it is sometimes. It seems ridiculous that people just accept it as fine.

I wonder if there are some people who would condemn the idea of sex robots but still see actual prostitution as empowering. By some people I mean some sex positive feminists.
I mean, obviously I’m not keen on sex robots! They are disturbing. And probably practise for would be punters, rapists, etc. And just odd.
Actual prostitution is more disturbing.

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