Giving up makeup

[NoLoveofMine]

I'm not sure if this is worthy of a thread but wasn't sure where else to put it; quite understandable if it's not of too much interest though...

Having been thinking about this since another thread recently I think I'm going to stop using makeup. This shouldn't really be notable or worthy of announcement, but I was considering that it's something almost exclusively done by girls and women and why I feel the need to use it when I go out yet no boys I know would (even though the boys I'm friends with don't conform to acting in a "masculine" manner they'd still not). There are of course many girls and women who love using makeup - some of my friends are like this, they really enjoy the whole process of it and even see it as a topic to discuss with one another sometimes. However, I have no interest in it, don't watch tutorials, don't discuss it other than from this perspective, yet still use it, purely because I feel I "look better" with it on. Why should any woman or girl feel the need to alter her natural face in this way to look better? I should find nothing wrong with myself pre-makeup and see no need for it. Given this, I'm going to try to stop using it - not remarkable admittedly but I've just been thinking a fair bit recently about it and why I use it. I want to feel very happy with how I look without it, after all. At the moment it feels like I "want" to use it, but only because I think I look better afterwards, so feel better about myself when I have before going out for example, but this shouldn't be the case. I think this is different to wearing skirts/dresses which I often do or even hairstyle because this is something which involves altering/masking your natural face. I suppose this also applies to body hair removal; I shave my legs as well and must confess am not sure this is something I'll stop doing when I know my legs will be visible. I'd like it to be, but it's difficult to rid myself of the feeling that this is a desirable look.

Anyway that was quite possibly of little interest to anyone but myself but ah well, I have a lot of free periods on Fridays. I also didn't mean it to sound self-centred, was more because I was just writing down what I was thinking about myself.

"Why should any woman or girl feel the need to alter her natural face in this way to look better"

Exactly. We don't really know what's a normal face for a woman now. I think it's easier not to do it when you're young as well. I'm constantly amazed why young women are wearing layers of make up, I used to think perhaps it was acne but now I have friends with daughters your age, I realise it's not, in many cases.

I think a lot of women don't enjoy make up but feel pressured. I'm an insomniac and wear concealer because a female boss told me bluntly she thought I looked awful. I don't wear make up outside work though.

Imagine how much money you'll save over years too.

At the moment it feels like I "want" to use it, but only because I think I look better afterwards

Bit of a dilemma, isn't it. Why should you stop doing something you want to do, just because society is also pressuring you to do it?
I've never really worn make up, just occasionally, because I can't be bothered more than anything else.
I do shave my legs, even though they never get seen! I wear jeans or other long trousers, but I shave them anyway because I feel, I dunno, unkempt, if I don't.
But then DH shaves his chin for a similar reason and there's no pressure on him to do that.

I haven't worn any for years. I do like to wear perfume but for myself because I like the smell.

Indeed Slimthistime. I don't wear what I'd consider a lot but then again it probably is a reasonable amount; whatever the case it's altering my face and I do it simply because I feel better after doing so. This is only as I think it looks better, but looks better for whom?

I do have some friends who are very "into" it as I said, they really do enjoy the application process and so forth, but others are like myself, don't find it interesting at all yet still apply it (though not all girls I know do, the vast majority do). As you say, those including myself in the latter group don't enjoy it, derive no pleasure from applying it, in fact find it a chore. I think your boss saying that was pretty awful and also think it is that some workplaces can still insist women wear makeup (and high heels I believe). It seems I'm only using it to alter my natural face for others, which is no reason to do so (or spend so much money on it for that matter).

So, I used to think I had to do all that jazz - cleaner and toner and goodness knows what.

At some point I found myself living in Singapore, with a bit more cash, and my skin care also went up to the next notch.

Then one day, I was in the bathroom, splashing on my SK-II stuff, when I realised what I was doing. I was splashing 'special' water onto my face (apparently some byproduct of the saki making industry) and was convinced it was doing me good.

Reader, I've not mucked about with any of that stuff for 10 years, and my skin is no different - in fact my skin looks pretty damn good for my age - no major wrinkles, smooth forehead etc. despite living in aircon and mediterranean sun and all the other things life throws at you.

I do put on light makeup when it's socially required and will benefit me - job interviews basically - but otherwise, it's all a con. Your skin will be fine with a rub in the shower (for a huge number of people - obviously there are some, like my son, who if he showers every day, needs some moisturiser)

Bit of a dilemma, isn't it. Why should you stop doing something you want to do, just because society is also pressuring you to do it?

It is, though on the other hand the only reason I want to is because I think it makes me look better - which is what makes me feel good about my appearance. It's that sentiment I want to change as I shouldn't feel I look better with my natural self being altered by makeup, especially as it's hugely due to my sex this feeling exists.

Shaving with men is significantly different I think as not only do they not have such expectations with regards to makeup to mask their faces, shaving body hair etc but also it's still acceptable for them to have facial hair, as many do.

I don't wear makeup unless I'm going out on the pull socialising, bar the odd bit of lipstick that makes me look healthier. Can't bear the feel of foundation on my skin, couldn't fancy a man wearing tinted moisturiser!

I never have really and don't see the need for it. What seems strangest to me, and I'm usually afraid to say so IRL, is that people dye their hair. Then they have to wear makeup because their hair is the wrong colour for their skin!

My local Boots now has a makeup counter staffed by men in very heavy makeup (think drag).

I love make up, always have. I enjoy putting it on and I like how I look with it on. But certainly no one should be pressured to wear it. All the best for your fresh face!

I also shave my legs and armpits. I actually get eczema on my legs if I don't shave. I'm allergic to quite a few things, don't know if I'm allergic to my own hair or something but it's genuinely uncomfortable if I don't shave my legs. Armpits are admittedly due to societal norms.

I wash my face with a tea tree oil facial wash and put moisturiser from the same range on afterwards so not sure what that says about me I probably might as well just use soap though.

I do put on light makeup when it's socially required and will benefit me - job interviews basically

Even this irks me SpaghettiAndMeatballs - not that you do it but that it's socially required for women. Another pressure to change our faces and spend time applying makeup just to be considered acceptable to be seen in an interview setting. It's not just that it's expected, as the interviewer could be someone who doesn't mind either way, but that it's the "safer" option if that makes sense.

I love make up, always have. I enjoy putting it on and I like how I look with it on. But certainly no one should be pressured to wear it. All the best for your fresh face!

Thanks! I know girls who very much enjoy putting makeup on which is why I made sure I was referring specifically to myself not everyone who puts makeup on. With me, it's that I like how I look afterwards despite finding it mundane if not an annoyance to actually buy it and put it on which is the problem. Given that I'm only doing it because I think I look better afterwards, and that looking better is for other people and changing how I naturally look when boys/men aren't pressured to, I'm finding it an issue that I do it at all. I can't see why it should be part of my routine before going out socialising.

With regards to removing body hair I know I do that because of expectations of how girls/women should look as well but confess I might find that more difficult to stop, though wish this wasn't the case.

mummy yes I've noticed this. I always want to dye my hair but then I remember at the moment I don't have to wear makeup everyday if I don't want to, but i would if I dyed my hair because I would probably look awful without it.

When I was 50 I met my present OH and we ran away to sea. We lived on a boat and travelled for 12 years. That was my excuse to stop wearing make-up and doing the whole skin care routine and how liberating it was! Now we still spend a lot of time on the water, I slather on sunscreen and moisturiser and tweezers are my friend, but that's all.

I never thought about it from a feminism point of view back then (see, I needed an excuse!) and I don't judge others for their choices, but I'm so glad not to be wasting all that time and money.

Shaving with men is significantly different I think as not only do they not have such expectations with regards to makeup to mask their faces, shaving body hair etc but also it's still acceptable for them to have facial hair, as many do.

That's what I mean. DH feels "wrong" if he hasn't shaved, but there's no expectation for him to shave - beards are totally acceptable.
I feel the same way with my legs - it feels "wrong" not to shave, is it because of societal expectations? Nobody ever sees my legs, so how can it be? Unless it's so deeply ingrained in me, I can't stope doing it even though nobody will ever see?

Running away to sea sounds enjoyable

It's something which is a specific pressure on girls and women which starts very young and I don't think that pressure should exist. Why should we ever need to wear makeup?

I feel the same way with my legs - it feels "wrong" not to shave, is it because of societal expectations? Nobody ever sees my legs, so how can it be? Unless it's so deeply ingrained in me, I can't stope doing it even though nobody will ever see?

Difficult to say and I suppose no-one could say for certain it's societal expectations. It is societal expectations with many women and girls, though, as many won't shave legs if they're not going to be seen for example. I know it's expectations with me even though as with makeup I feel "better" about myself once I've done it because I think it looks better, but why I think that has come from society's perception of what's attractive on girls/women.

I stopped wearing make-up when I was 23, and didn't wear it again for five years - at which point I went out and bought some because I was getting married and I thought I would regret it if I didn't wear make up. From there I got tempted back, and I now wear blusher and mascara probably every other day.

I stopped for all the same reasons as you: why should I when men don't? Why do I feel the need to put layers of colour on my face to look 'normal'? Why shouldn't I feel good in my own skin? Additionally, I stopped because I was concerned about the chemicals in make-up - see here: Chemicals of Concern.

I found that when I went cold turkey I really hated looking in the mirror at first. I felt like I looked tired and strange. But when I got used to my face without make-up, I started to feel that my face with make-up looked strange - rather like I would feel if I saw my brother in mascara (I mean nothing against men who choose to wear make-up by saying this; I'm just saying that I am used to seeing him without mascara on his eyelashes).

More and more make-up has found its way onto my dresser in the last few years, but I recently chucked loads of it out again, and I have been toying with the idea of banning myself from even wearing mascara and blusher except on very special occasions (think family weddings). I would rather spend my money on decent quality clothes and regular hair cuts, if I want to feel that I look good.

I also experimented with not removing body hair but found that I just did not feel sexy with hairy legs. Societal pressure or not, I want to enjoy sex and I didn't with unremoved body hair because I just felt hugely aware of it all the time!

I think this topic is of great interest (to me, anyway!) and I would love to see a movement towards bare faces for women. My younger cousins wear TONS of make-up, and they look absolutely beautiful (I was so inept at make-up at their age - I blame the fact that YouTube tutorials weren't invented then!) but I reckon they'd look beautiful without it, too.

I know what you mean. On the one hand, why stop doing something if you enjoy it or it makes you feel better. On the other hand, we all know that the only reason we ever learned to enjoy it or realised that it made us feel better about ourselves is because we happened to be born female in a world which expects women to spend more money and effort on their appearance than men do. And a world which often judges us harshly if we decide not to.

I find it hard to make myself go out of the house without make-up on and I feel pleased with the way I look once I have put make-up on. I am pale-skinned with the odd blemish, dark circles under my eyes and generally not great skin tone. But I know that if I were a man, that would be my face and I would not feel the need to cover it up. And I don't really think that's how things should be.

Great post RumpetaRumpeta.

I stopped for all the same reasons as you: why should I when men don't? Why do I feel the need to put layers of colour on my face to look 'normal'? Why shouldn't I feel good in my own skin?

This is very much what I've been feeling and it's got to me a little. It's evidence of the standards placed on the appearance of women and girls in my opinion, to the extent that applying makeup to alter our faces is considered standard almost and expected in some settings, something internalised from a young age. I also want to be able to tell girls in younger years at my school, should it come up (there's a fair bit of interaction between year groups) that they shouldn't feel compelled to wear makeup or feel it's something they have to do - which would be less convincing if I wasn't convinced of it myself, I imagine. To me it seems like something which just happens to girls very young, as if it's part of being a girl (and subsequently woman) so it's something you should be "into" or, if not, definitely make sure you apply. I know girls who enjoy watching makeup tutorials but I also wonder if some feel pressured quite young to apply it and that they should be viewing them because they see so many other girls doing it and the general view is that it's "what teenage girls love". As I'm one of those who has no interest yet still uses makeup I think it's about time I stopped - but need to make sure I still feel good about how I look when going out socially without it, which I should!

Yep. Not really worth discussing.

Exactly how I feel Eolian. It's that this is something we feel specifically because of being female which bothers me. Though I feel better about myself when I've applied makeup, due to thinking I look better, this is only due to my sex and the implications behind that are awful. That women and girls aren't acceptable to be viewed without makeup, that our natural selves need to be altered and we need to spend time and money on makeup to ensure we meet the standards expected (then often judged no matter what anyway).

Yep. Not really worth discussing.

Then don't bother posting, it's not difficult to ignore the discussion.

I hardly ever wear it anymore. It makes me feel grubby anyway.

Sometimes I wear make up and sometimes I don't. I think your attitude to it depends a lot on the people you are surrounded by. I frequent a lot of people who don't wear make up so it doesn't feel weird to me. I am also quite lazy and often decide not to wear make up on a night out because I can't be bothered to do it and then take it off in a few hours.

Always important to get a wee snidey post in though Ttbb ?

I too want to totally give up makeup. However I have really bad skin and feel I would just end up in tears at work comparing myself to all the overly made up women...
I often go without when on annual leave to see if my skin stars to clear up/de grease without it, but it never does