I'm so cross

[Yolandafarthing]

Just need somewhere to vent. My local parent's Facebook group had a post from a woman complaining she has hardly any help from her husband WRT housework/childcare and asking if others struggle too. Cue loads of other women commiserating.

Then the bloody admin shuts the comments on the thread down, because "it feels pretty negative to men, and I know that many of us have fantastic, pro-active and supportive partners, many of whom go to work as well as parent, and some of us are two Dad or two Mum families. If you swap the word 'man' for other descriptors like ethnicity or religion, it becomes clear that sweeping statements are unfair and inaccurate....I don't want [group name] to be a place where we perpetuate sexist stereotypes."

I'm fuming. This is a woman speaking. A woman silencing other women, because poor men.

Thoughts?

They have a point.

I meant to put this in feminist chat - I've asked for it to be moved!

Depend so on what they were saying. If people started the 'men are so useless' and 'men always shirk their duties' comments then I think she had a point. If people were saying 'my DH does xyz' and others said 'my DH is just like that' that would be fine but I suspect the former was the case.

Imagine a thread where men were saying 'women just don't bother working once kids come along' and 'women want us to pay for everything' etc. Horrible stereotyping and I'd want that sort of talk removed too.

Women are an oppressed group. Men are not.

So it's ok to talk shit about them and reinforce negative stereotypes about them?

Double standards does not help women's efforts towards equality.

As a feminist I am not fighting for equality, I am fighting for liberation from male oppression.

We can't have anything resembling equality until that happens.

Ok so there are some men who are wonderful and supportive blablabla. But you only have to read these forums day to day to see that in the majority of cases women take mental responsibility for most domestic work including childcare. The mental load, which is what that thread was about.

And there wasn't a single comment saying "all men are like X".

As a feminist I am not fighting for equality, I am fighting for liberation from male oppression.

Don't be so fucking ridiculous.

Why is that fucking ridiculous?

I wouldn't want to read a thread full of whinging on Facebook. It's bad enough reading here about the useless men some women are married to.

So women just shouldn't talk about it then?

A lot of these women were single mothers.

I don't think FB is the place for it.

I also would hate to read a thread of men moaning about their wives.

I'm with you yolanda.

Today 06:58 Yolandafarthing

Women are an oppressed group. Men are not.

--+-

I've read some silly things inherent over the years but your comment has got to be one of the silliest.

Try telling it to one of the decent, hardworking men who discover one day that their wife the mother of the children is booting them out of the house and it will be very very difficult to see his children anymore but if he could just hand over lots of money for the children he will no longer raise and who are now going to call another man daddy.

Men are just as oppressed as women if not more in modern society.

Men are just as oppressed as women if not more in modern society.

Yeah...no.

^ wow, what utter bollocks.

What baffles me though is that these women are sitting there complaining instead of doing something about it. Why put up with it? They should be talking to their DHs and getting them to pick up the slack.

I divorced a lazy DH.

That was in response to the poster above you, stoic!

It's true. Women have never had it so good.

Go back 60 years and things were different. Today women have never had so much support and it's swung the other way with men know losing out.

What baffles me though is that these women are sitting there complaining instead of doing something about it. Why put up with it?

I think they see it as normal. TBH doesn't really help when they get a bunch of replies saying "oh I just think men are wired differently - they aren't good at multitasking" or whatever.

Lol ok fei.

It is fucking ridiculous because you are perpetuating the very thing you claim to be against - gender stereotyping. But that's ok, right? Cause it's against men not women?

They are not stereotypes tomatoes, they are experiences of women.

Women are oppressed. That is fact. Not stereotype.

what ridiculous bollocks. This thread validates my reasons for hiding the feminist board.

Men are just as oppressed as women if not more in modern society

Lol

Yes nasty old feminists eh!