Do women use certain terms to 'shame' certain types of men?

[Enzouk]

Just wondering about female perspectives on this. I increasingly hear women calling guys 'creepy' as a shaming tactic..generally I think that the women doing so do it only if they don't find the man attractive. Where as they will pander to a guy who is physically attractive to thrm they will hate on a guy who acts the exact same way who physically is not attractive to them. I have seen women do it in front of groups of friends in a sort of 'lets put this guy in his place' way. Thoughts? And what do you think of women who do this?

Also, i suppose on similar lines...are women more shallow than men with regards to physical attraction?

And that fits with everyone else's perception perfectly, gone. Women are not allowed to express their displeasure about men invading their spaces a they are expected to put up, shut up and put out. Or be criticized.
I think women posting on a feminist board are absolutely entitled to find some thing slightly snigger worthy about unwanted mansplaining and handmaiden handwringing, and to make a wee joke sock puppetry.
But the handmaidens expect feminists, who are being invaded in our own space, to be all about the menz.

Don't forget about us having no sense of humour. Dour po-faced feminazis.

The po face goes nicely with my hairy legs mrstp. Which is marginally ironic, because we all know that us butch feminazis with our armpit hair and no make-up aren't the gals the op is whining about being 'shamed' by anyway, because dudes sure as hell wouldn't be approaching us in bars - they would be propping up the bar and slagging off the ugly munts in the corner. We're just a convenient target for more male abuse on a Friday night when the op wants to pick a fight. It's probably our fault though. Infecting those nice normal gals with our equality poison and all, when everyone knows that any pretty gal in a bar should be appropriately grateful for any male attention. After all, it's what they are there for, innit?
Incidentally op, as someone supporting a family through a close female friend's several suicide attempts, I find your 'men have it harder because suicide' extremely distasteful and evidence that you have little to no understanding of mental health issues at all. Attempting to use this stat as 'evidence' to further your weak argument shows either poor intellect and/ or more evidence of goady fuckery. 0/10.

Is it just me or has there been some twisting and turning with the main argument here? At some points the argument has been that unattractive men get shamed by being called 'creepy' despite doing nothing unusual or wrong. Then the argument was that attractive men get away with horrible behaviour because they are attractive. These are not the same thing!

An attractive man being given the benefit of the doubt occasionally while potentially showing himself to be a douchebag does not mean that women owe unattractive men potentially showing themselves to be douchebags the benefit of the doubt as well.

Not to mention that I think it's easier to give an attractive man the benefit of the doubt precisely because you don't expect them to have to use mind games/negging etc to get laid.

You know when things fall into place with massive clunking sounds? Gone's presence on this thread has just made that happen for me..........

MrsTP, you forgot... feminists don't live in the real world and no feminist has ever been raped, these and other gems might be thrown at you soon.

In what way bertrand? (Sorry if it's obvious!)

Don't go on any of the Ched Evans threads in that case Bertrand...

leaveit

I have never seen it

I am not lying

Everything the op has posted has been a load of bollocks

Still i have been enjoying all the responses

of course not.

no feminist has ever called a man a "misogynist" simply because he disagrees with her on some feminist issue.

cough

Women are not allowed to express their displeasure about men invading their spaces a they are expected to put up, shut up and put out.

But if no one ever crosses into someone else's 'space, how is anyone to get to know each other? Isn't that part of being human - to make connections? Don't say 'there's a way to do it' because I'm responding to the suggestion that men are thinking for women simply by walking over to them.

Is a woman not allowed to walk over to a man either, then? Or is it ok if she does it 'nicely'? Or would men still be entitled to tell her she is a creep for invading their space? (Somehow, sadly, I think the OP may be onto something with the concept that people take offence more easily based on attractiveness, because this would be so much more likely to happen if the woman wasn't hot).

I'll see if MNHQ feel the same about your 'wee joke about sp'... BTW words like 'wee' are overused by men when they know they've victimised someone and are trying to minimise it. As is the idea that 'everyone' thinks something or 'everyone' finds something funny.

What's really depressing about threads like this is how many women have come to mimic traits that are stereotypical for obnoxious men and are, rightly, deplored when they are seen in men.

Not to mention that I think it's easier to give an attractive man the benefit of the doubt precisely because you don't expect them to have to use mind games/negging etc to get laid.

Unbelievable.

So can we expect men to look cynically at ugly women who are - of course - more likely to be cunning and manipulative?

And I don't expect you to be all about the menz pont. But if you're expecting and demanding that men behave respectfully and whatever else you think men should be doing, why do you seem to think you have a free pass on offering the same kind of treatment in return?

There's quite a spectrum between 'Go away, you creep' and 'Oh, how can I meet your needs/win your approval/let you down gently' etc.

BertrandRussell

Perhaps you should start another thread for people who only agree with you - that seems to be your style.

Perhaps I'm getting old, but when I was out in bars, getting to know strangers, your eye would run around the bar, and occasionally something would spark with another pair of eyes, there'd be a bit more looking and you'd engineer some way to meet up, and see what you thought of each other while ordering drinks/queuing for the loo/whatever.

Although, in general, I'd only go out with people who I already knew and had a spark from through mutual friends or work - since randomly chatting up strangers is dangerous and has a poor hit rate.

Gone - you're missing some context. Women rarely rape, beat or murder men, and they're a lot smaller, therefore less intimidating, so yes, a woman going up to a bloke is less likely to be seen as invading a man's space as the other way around.

Why would I just approach someone just because I wanted to with no signs they were wanting me to I do not feel that entitled to think that way

I find that sad. It wouldn't occur to me to think of life in such an adversarial way.

I would actually prefer a mature, 'Hi, I'm X, don't want to bother you if you're busy if your friends but...' than ten minutes of weird man Looking with me Looking Back - but then I'm not fifteen.

they're a lot smaller, therefore less intimidating

I doubt if they were absolutely honest, that many men feel this. There are many different kinds of intimidation! Feeling emotionally intimidated is very real and just as threatening. But many women can match men physically too.

I'm uncomfortable with women dreaming up special reasons why they can do things relationally that men aren't allowed to do on the grounds that women are never a threat.

Gone You really do have some serious issues with women which comes across very clearly in your posts. If I can see this just by your words on a page, I would imagine you would probably scare the crap out of me in real life!

kua

I am a woman, and a woman on a small scale. And I take no shit from anyone actually, male or female. I clash with feminism because there's an assumption that we're allowed to be 'unfair' because we're oppressed. I don't agree and don't think that's a great advertisement for women or the path to healthy relationships with ourselves or men.

Not saying we're not oppressed.

I stand by what I said, I made no mention of your sex.

But if no one ever crosses into someone else's 'space, how is anyone to get to know each other?

By invi-fucking-tation. Radical I know, the idea that someone would wait until they had been given a sign their intrusion was a welcome one.

If I am out having a good time with my friends discussing whatever we are discussing why would anyone feel the need to approach us we dont it need their company to make our night out more enjoyable

If I saw a man I found attractive and was hoping in some way contact could be made I would send out signals if he is interest he may pick up on them and we may bump into each other at the bar, pass each other smile before one of us makes the approach

I certainly would not go over and introduce myself if he was in a discussion with his friends and hadn't paid me the slightest bit of attention why would I think it was my place to

I think you seem to think women are thrilled by any attention they get

I find that sad. It wouldn't occur to me to think of life in such an adversarial way.

Are you able to accept that the fact that it would not occur to you to think of life in such an adversarial way is indicative of your own extreme good fortune?