Why are men so turned off by women with short hair?

[MissTessmacher]

Just idly musing.

I recently cut my hair quite drastically. Changed my photo on OLD to one with the new do (previous photo was very glam/pin-up style with shoulder length hair).

I've gone from a very steady average of 10-15 messages a day to zero .

It's not the first time I've observed this phenomenon. The few times before I've cut my hair very short I have noticed it's like a cloak of invisibility when it comes to men.

Anyone care to enlighten me? Is it because women with short hair are considered unfeminine? (What a crock of shit if so).

[Pyjamaramadrama]

But surely the opposite is men with long hair? I would be interested to see if a man with long hair was overall as attractive to women?

[scallopsrgreat]

"Men are allowed to look boring and/or ugly, women are not. That's the difference." Yep totally agree.

And yes I agree pyjama there would probably be less of an uptake of women finding men with long hair attractive. That's what social conditioning does for you!

[VestalVirgin]

I don't know ... the men with long hair I know, who also have reasonably handsome faces, either have steady girlfriends or sleep around a lot. Since I find long hair on men attractive, this is a source of eternal disappointment for me.

It may well be that not as many women are attracted to men with long hair as are attracted to men with short hair, but at the moment, there seems to be more demand than supply, so to speak.

[celeste83]

Depends how long hair on a man. Certainly not that long hair past the shoulders looking like a hippy look no i don't find that attractive. Styled nicely ear length hair on a man looks great though. And most importantly its not greasy.

[BabyGanoush]

mamamary, not sure about porn.

Women in paintings from centuries ago mainly have long hair.

Boticelli's Birth of Venus was painted over 500 years ago, the beauty ideal of the time, and before hair extensions were invented...

it's not a new thing

[noeffingidea]

I agree it's a trend. I just think it's associated with feminity. How many men would be turned off by a woman with hairy armpits? The majority, I suspect. Logically they know that hairy underarms are just as natural for women as they are for men, but most people still think women need to remove their underarm hair to be sexy.
I've got to add, my DIL has short hair, she looks lovely, and my son loves it. Looking back, Marilyn Monroe had quite short hair, and she was one of the biggest sex symbols ever so I don't think there's anything intrinsic about short hair women not being considered sexy.

[JeanneDeMontbaston]

Well, nor is porn a new thing, baby.

[cadnowyllt]

Maybe evolution of men has not taken away their ability to be shallow about appearance

Not being in the least fussy, leads to having more offspring in the next generation - hey presto, survival of the fittest.

[Alibabsandthe40Musketeers]

Every man I have ever slept with, even most of those I have kissed, have a some point put their hands into my hair and taken hold. Some gently, some roughly.

I do have it much shorter these days, chin length bob, but there is still enough to get hold of..

It's just a thing, subconsciously many men want to do this, and so when faced with just an image of you, minus the attraction of being with you in person, fewer of them will find you attractive.

I agree that there are also issues around lesbians, feminists etc which i'm sure influence some.

[SomeDyke]

"Every man I have ever slept with, even most of those I have kissed, have a some point put their hands into my hair and taken hold."
Really? The bloody weird world of heterosexuality, from my perspective. That is just such a controlling, dominant gesture.

"I agree that there are also issues around lesbians, feminists etc" Except why? Is it because it is assumed that lesbians and nasty feminists have got better things to do with their time than pimp and preen for men? Because, let's face it, if maintaining a full, glossy, well-groomed head of hair was so brilliant and fun, the chaps would be doing it too...........

Of course, I know that at some periods men had long hair as well -- but I suspect more as a sign that they didn't have to work (ditto men and high heels) and were rich enough to pay body servants to keep it groomed. Because for a working man, getting long locks caught in a complicated piece of agricultural machinery would tend to shorten something...........

Ancient Egyptians were perhaps quite practical when it came to hair -- long hair was hot and a breeding ground for lice, so men and women shaved it off, and then wore special wigs!

I'm just thinking of the many times that shaving a womans head was seen as a cause of shame and disgrace (think women who had affairs with german occupiers), or a sign of purification or renouncing the world when christian nuns take their vows.

Then we have muslim women and the headscarf or veil, and a muslim chap I knew once who thought my own shaved head was an obvious symbol to all men that I wasn't interested in them. Because seems that for him, long hair on a woman (which he didn't get to see) became intensely erotic.

I was quite interested to read lately that in sikhism, neither men nor women are supposed to cut or remove any hair, and some sikh women have begun to wear the turban, as well as the men.

For me -- shaving my head is practical (no barbers fees!), cheap, cool in summer (and you can wear a hat in winter). And also, because it is still seen as a big thing when a woman (think Britney, for example) removes her head hair.

[scallopsrgreat]

That's really interesting SomeDyke. I hadn't really thought about the overt negative connotations of short hair on women.

I think the abundance of porn has changed over the last 20 years and as such so it will have much more effect on us and our culture/social conditioning. I've mentioned on another thread but when I was at school there were about 50:50 short:long hair amongst the girls but now you are struggling to find a short haired girl of school age. So there is definitely a trend and I don't necessarily think it is a good one for women as long hair requires a great deal more management than a short back and sides!

[Pyjamaramadrama]

I have long hair and I don't consider it high maintenance. I can wash it and go, I can tie it back, I can blow dry it if I want to too. I don't need to get it cut often. I like my hair.

I'd find having to cut my hair every 6 weeks more hassle.

[ABetaDad1]

My DW does not have a log in but would like to contribute the following:

"Its because men are frightened by serious clever women and need a kick in the balls and if you are faffing about with your hair you don't have time to kick them in the balls".

OK. I think she needs to get her own log in then.

[MrNoseybonk]

"I agree that there are also issues around lesbians, feminists etc" Except why? Is it because it is assumed that lesbians and nasty feminists have got better things to do with their time than pimp and preen for men?"

Don't take this the wrong way, but I've always wondered about the skinhead gay man look and short haired lesbian look.
(Obviously only a subsection).
Could it be a covert symbol to others to let them know you might be interested/not interested.
I wouldn't think it's assumed that lesbians have better things to do than pimp and preen for men, but that men see that style and think "she wouldn't be interested".

[Spandexpants007]

If you have a petite face, cheekbones and/or no second chin, you can carry short hair well. If you have no chin and a large face go for long hair but keep it shiny.

[scallopsrgreat]

Oh well that's me buggered then

[almondpudding]

'Every man I have ever slept with, even most of those I have kissed, have a some point put their hands into my hair and taken hold. Some gently, some roughly. '

I have long hair and this has never happened to me.

[Alibabsandthe40Musketeers]

I'm obviously shagging a completely different subset of men then almond Genuinely, every single one.

Re: the lesbian, feminist comment. I'm not saying it is right, not at all. But a stereotype and a rhetoric have grown up around how some women in these groups present themselves. That is bound to play on the subconscious of some men.

[motherinferior]

Some men - clearly perverts all - fancy feminists. Strange but true. We're not all of us secretly regretting our inability to get a shag.

For the record I've had long hair, short hair, mid-length hair. I look my best, I always end up realising, with a pixie crop. Accessorised with bright red lipstick and a nose stud.

[BreakingDad77]

I have a pet theory about this - I think there are groups of men who are socialised to be attracted to very feminine-performing women

I would agree with this and the shorter you get the more androgenous you can appear.

But also some haircuts just don't suit people, I remember issabel rosallini always having a short haircut (though she was a model).

[TeiTetua]

Yet here are men with their differing face shapes mainly going around with short hair.

Men are allowed to look boring and/or ugly, women are not. That's the difference.

Or, men are required to wear a uniform and women are not, and it's conformity to the standard appearance that counts for men. It's true though, women must use their freedom of choice to avoid looking boring or ugly, or face criticism for failing.

[DrSeussRevived]

". If you have no chin and a large face go for long hair but keep it shiny."

Roger wilco.

[TeiTetua]

I was in a couples workshop a while ago where one couple was lesbian, aged fiftyish. They had a very similar appearance, with a short haircut, less than collar length but somehow still not quite the way you'd expect a man's hair to look. Both with smallish earrings. If I'd met one of them on her own I doubt if I'd have thought "There's a lesbian" but I might have thought she looked a little unusual, though not startling. Maybe I'm not meeting many people.

I suppose it was pretty much the style that this writer hates:
www.google.com/search?q=lesbian+crop&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8#q=lesbian+hairstyle

[WhatsGoingOnEh]

Well hair does get shorter after menopause

WHAT?! Is this true?? Ugh. I'm 44, my long hair is honestly my best feature. Am I going to lose that too, along with my waist/nice skin/teeth/arse/ability to go weeks WITHOUT staving my chin, and everything else that ageing is stealing from me?!

OP, lots of men prefer women with hair -- chin-length and over. No idea why, but they do. But if you love your new crop, rock it! And sod all of them. :)

[TeiTetua]

Sorry, this writer:
effingdykes.blogspot.com/2009/05/homo-haircuts.html