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Original poster

Radio 5 phone in on consent at 9.00am

239 replies

Caprinihahahaha · 16/10/2015 08:28

They just called to see if I wanted to go on but I have laryngitis .
I'm not feeling well so maybe I shouldn't listen. I have a feeling it's going to give me the rage.

It's such an interesting topic though - they are picking up on the students refusing to go to lectures on consent because they are 'not rapists'.

OP posts:
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UnderTheGreenwoodTree · 18/10/2015 17:32

And people will be free to draw inferences from your choice of words and phrases, cadno.

I just love that there are so many men on MN who are willing to jump all over rape threads and insist that men know all there is to know about consent when they're just setting off to university. Thank you pan for not being one of them.

Shame that there are still so many sexual assaults on University campuses, isn't it?

LisbethSalandersPan · 18/10/2015 17:34

cadno - have pissed on your chips?

See, the same message conveyed without a value-laden overtone. Unless of course the value of the fried potato slice is considered a demographic sensitivity?

Really though, I am absolutely sure you'll decide on your words, it's just that society moves on, and I'm pretty sure you are bright enough to know that language is important, so its worthwhile being aware of such developments and to not so would leave you as some sort of dinosaur and easily dismissed, outside of your close friendship/family group.

cadnowyllt · 18/10/2015 17:36

and...?

LisbethSalandersPan · 18/10/2015 17:40

of course 'have I pissed on your chips', cadno.

Under - consent can be tricky at times, but suggesting it's not relevant for most people, and esp for our young people is absurd.

LisbethSalandersPan · 18/10/2015 17:42

and...?

Have a think about things cadno.

cadnowyllt · 18/10/2015 17:49

Pissed on my chips ? - you having a laugh ?

Oh and you might like to question your own use of the word 'dinosaur' - nothing wrong with dinosaurs...a very successful group of animals - it wasn't their fault a huge rock impacted the planet 64 million years ago.

LisbethSalandersPan · 18/10/2015 18:00

are you having a laugh?

dinosaurs - yes lovely animals, just got lost by developments that led to their extinction. As I say, have a think. Dinosaurs demise was not of their conscious choosing. You and I have a choice.

cadnowyllt · 18/10/2015 18:14

Dinosaurs were probably not lovely animals - don't be so patronising. what are you like ?

PS No urine on my chips, by the way.

BertrandRussell · 18/10/2015 18:16

What do you mean, dinosaurs weren't nice?

LisbethSalandersPan · 18/10/2015 18:27

dinosaurs were lovely animals, as far as we can tell. So the Bible missed them out entirely, from Genesis through to Exodus (though differing religions have different ordering/contents), BUT...you take my point cadno...change or die....or get hit by a meteorite, and die..or suffer an Ice Age..and die...

just have think. It isn't too late....Smile

BuffytheReasonableFeminist · 18/10/2015 18:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PlaysWellWithOthers · 18/10/2015 18:36

Dinosaurs were delightful. Just unable to show it.

Radio 5 phone in on consent at 9.00am
Elendon · 18/10/2015 18:37

Bertrand that's ace. How do I copy and paste?

My children will love this.

PlaysWellWithOthers · 18/10/2015 18:38

Not too bright either.

Radio 5 phone in on consent at 9.00am
Elendon · 18/10/2015 18:47

Did it. They love it. Thanks Bert.

LisbethSalandersPan · 18/10/2015 18:54

I think some of you are not taking this recent exchange seriously....

cadnowyllt · 18/10/2015 18:57

I know I'm not - had half an eye on the Australia versus Scotland match anyway.

LisbethSalandersPan · 18/10/2015 19:13

"If you're happy and you know it.."...keyboard decorating stuff.Grin

PlaysWellWithOthers · 18/10/2015 19:48

I have it on a T-shirt. Which makes me very happy indeed. Grin

BuffytheReasonableFeminist · 18/10/2015 19:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PlaysWellWithOthers · 18/10/2015 20:14

DD has excellent taste then Grin

DontHaveAUsername · 19/10/2015 12:58

"I really wonder why you want to defend this man so much. His rights aren't being encroached on, whereas women's are. Where is your outrage for that?"

Womens rights are being encroached on but that's a separate issue, you're acting like him not going to this class is actually causing their rights to be encroached.

"He should not get to decide though, that's the problem. He is not the server. He is the receiver."

Why shouldn't he have the right to choice? His decision not to go doesn't affect any of us, it only affects him in so far as that he'll have to accept the punishment for non attendance. If he's decided he's willing to take that punishment rather than go, it's up to him. He shouldn't be forced.

ChunkyPickle · 19/10/2015 13:17

Dont - society constrains us all the time - there are lots of things that I'm perfectly capable of doing that I'm not allowed to do, because society realises that not all individuals are good at knowing what they are capable of. Because of that, even though I probably could hitch up my gas stove, I'm not allowed to. And the people that are go on yearly courses to make sure that they still can.

This means that society as a whole is safer, because no-one is going round thinking they know it all about hitching up gas pipes when then don't, no-one is happily wandering into your home and leaving it set to explode, no matter how sure they are that they can do it.

This is the same. We are asking him (all freshers) to go on a course, so we can be a bit more sure that they know what consent is. It doesn't matter how sure he is that he knows all about it, society will be safer if he, and all his compatriots go on a little course and have a reminder.

I wouldn't trust a non-gas-safe engineer to do my gas, yet you're expecting all these students to trust that this guy knows when he's crossing the consent line. Imagine if he's planning to be in healthcare, how important it is to understand consent! I've met plenty of HCPs who could also do with a refresher!

Dervel · 19/10/2015 13:24

You seem to be suffering cognitive dissonance DontHaveAUsername. On the one hand he shouldn't be forced yet equally if he's willing to submit to University sanctions. What are you defining as force in this instance? If you are saying it's going too far if a squad of heavily armed feminist stormtroopers forcing him at the point of a gun? Or if say the University concerned chooses to expel or suspend him for failing to attend? Does that qualify as force or is it fair for the university to set the terms for attendance?

I don't think anyone here is advocating the point of a gun approach, but a University has a duty of care and a right to take steps to protect itself from litigation. Besides University is unfortunately a place where a great deal of Rape/Sexual Assault takes place. You can argue the workshop approach is not the right way toward, but to expect to be taken seriously I'd expect to see solid data indicating such programs have not seen any decrease in rapes/assaults, and I'm not sure any do at this stage as such programs are still relatively new.

In short something has to be done to reduce these horrible crimes you are either on board on that point or you are not. If you have any reasoned or erudite suggestions on how to best achieve this I'm all ears.

thedancingbear · 19/10/2015 13:25

One question that strikes me as obvious - why is this happening to new undergrads at 18, rather than in school at 15/16? You get to people sooner - before they're more likely to be sexually active and/or have their opinions ingrained - and you don't miss out the 60% (or whatever it is) of people who don't go to university.

As far as the compulsion to hear this stuff goes, would it be possible/reasonable to make it part of the national curriculum? I do have a slight misgiving in principle about making attendance at an ostensibly unrelated course compulsory in order to attain access to something as basic as an education, though would concede that it's probably the lesser evil.