When I talk about DV against women to some men.....

[Fireirons]

They immediately turn the conversation around to women being violent towards men. Yep. Women are also violent. I agree.

Yes there is no way violence is acceptable either way

But I cannot even begin to articulate my arguments about how women are often helpless, abused to an extent to being too terrified to leave, have no financial independence, no where to go, threatened, raped etc

I was shaking with anger the other day by a guy who just shouted me down...........that proved my point to a way. He asked for stats and then didn't believe them and tried for 45 minutes to Google stats for male DV.

Are there rescue centres for victims of male domestic violence seeking sanctuary?

I have nc for this.

Yep I have experienced DV.

I don't think my facts were debunked, the video was brought into question fair enough. I just think we have different opinions on the matter, i'm totally happy with that

People do this about most types of inequality I think. If there is a conversation about the Slave Trade, a large proportion of white people are VERY quick to point out that there were black slave masters too. I just think that some people ate too uncomfortable with the truth. Unwilling to accept it, no matter what

The facts are fun quote was aimed at the troll. Not you. Sorry that wasn't crystal clear, I did write it after quoting Trolly McTroll's stupid comment. I do apologise if that made you feel like it might be aimed at you.

The video has been roundly debunked. Frame by frame. GIYF

Vincenzo... That's sadly true. The type of person who says things like that is not someone to be listened to, because they ignore the basic facts about who had the power and who were the oppressed. There are always members of the oppressed class who will do the oppressors work for them. Such it was with the black slave masters, but the power still lay with whites, who could take away the small powers of the black slave masters if those people didn't perform their roles adequately, or rocked the boat in any way.

people who ignore the basic facts about who holds the power and who is oppressed, should not be listened to

Sorry, I have no copy and paste facility, I know I changed that a bit;

But I totally agree. It is what happens in the male victims of dv comeback. And pretty much what has happened on this thread

I really don't want to carry this on, as I don't want to be accused of de-railing the thread/posting too much and i definitely don't want an argument or insults! (havn't worked out how to hide a thread yet)

But please, please don't construe me as someone who is ignorant to dv, gender discrimination etc. I've already posted one of my experiences, but another is of dv, having to get emergency injunctions etc. But the most profound experience was a workshop my DF practically made me attend after than on recognising abusive relationships. I will never forget the experiences those other women shared, and some of the abusers for those women were other women. I have since recognised other abusive women in my life and the effects it has had on me and others and some of the things that 3 particular women have said/done will never leave me despite the dv and SA.

From this background all i've basically expressed is that i agree with all feminist issues and principles, but i personally disagree when it is not distinguished that both the vast majority of do not act/approve of this and that women can be abusers and contribute to victim blaming etc. too.

It's just my personal thoughts i was happy to discuss/explore it but i'm sorry for clogging up the thread. Totally understand the points that reasonable pp have made and it's been at times a stimulating and interesting discussion.

On that note at this ungodly hour i'm going to bed!

No one disagrees that women can be perps and they can victim blame.

That's what's been so very taxing about this thread - lego, you've spent five pages and god knows how many words disagreeing with stuff that nobody's said.

You're right, anyway, it's late. An hour later than it was five minutes ago! Sweet dreams.