Feminist Pub XVIII, in which the Bluestocking greets the first signs of spring with a glass of something soothing

[PuffinsAreFictitious]

Just starting this one as the last is nearly full

it's definitely culturally conditioned, because i think people might think if they didn't comment at all it meant they didn't like it (and that you would care about this), so they have to say something to prove that that's not the case

(At least in some cultures) hair is strongly linked to femininity. The last time I got a buzz cut I got a lot of the "you can get away with it because you are pretty" comments, which I read as "thank God you don't look masculine with that short hair" (because obviously that would be the WORST thing that could happen to a women ever). Similarly, when my brother grew his hair long as a teenager my parents got a lot of flak from friends who wondered out loud how on Earth my parents allowed him to do that, to which they responded that as long as said hair was clean he could do whatever he wanted with it! And so have my brother and I done: over the years we've gone short, long, bleached, pink....

I am actually thinking of getting out of investment banking IT and if I do, God knows the first thing I am doing is dying my hair mermaid blue.

My older son had very long hair as a toddler and people said aren't you afraid that people will think he's a girl as if that was the worst thing that could happen!

I'm afraid I'm place marking. I've been on holiday, and the pub has dropped off my list of threads I'm on. I might have something sensible to say once I've caught up but then again I might not

Just popping in to wave from Málaga.

That thing on planes about items in the overhead lockers might have shifted in transit? I was ready for my bag, but got distracted by the steward's jacket falling on my face, so then didn't catch the bag - well, I did - just on my cheek rather than in my arms...

I was given a red carnation for buying a book on World Book Day.

I suppose shaved hair is less commented on in men, because a lot of them do it when they start balding. Hardly anyone talks about female pattern baldness. Also, women often are judged by their hair in a way men aren't.

I have thought some men haven't got the best-shaped head for baldness, but I'm pretty sure I've never voiced it, except possibly to a close friend. Besides, baldness isn't always a choice, whether it's genes or illness, so there's no point telling someone they look rubbish without hair, if their only solution would be a wig - and why should it matter anyway?

I'm going to have to have a word with DS, he's decided he doesn't like short hair on women. Why this is I have no idea. I'm surprised as his sisters pour him full of their feminism and, in the main, it has been digested.

I think he's free to not like short hair on women as long as he keeps his opinion to himself ... I love short hair on women. At least on one woman - me. I'm going to skive off work one day to get my hair cut.

The hair thing is interesting. My (male) boss has very short hair (probably #2 all over). I think it looks wrong, but I would never dream of saying anything. In fact I think he looks less professional than my other two male colleagues who have longer hair and clearly style it each day. I'm now wondering if I'm being unreasonable to judge them in this way.

LordC, he's apparently made derogatory comments about short hair on women, which I will investigate further. If it's true he will be told 1/ it's none of his business, 2/ women do what the fuck they like, have you learned nothing from your sisters and your mother? and 3/ I wouldn't say that in the company of women unless you want to stay single.

And on the subject of bald men, yes, that describes me. Well, balding at least. And yes, I have a weird shaped head that a totally shaved look does me no favours. Too many bumps etc. :o

What happened to Buffy? No, I haven't seen her. Why was she deleted?

Surely Buffy can't be gone - what happened?

You what? I saw one of her posts was deleted, not much more than that (weird in itself I thought): are you saying she has gone completely?

I noticed I've not seen Still around for a couple of days either, but I think that's her being upset with us/ namechanged/ on hol etc. Hope it's not that she's upset.

I don't know if she has gone completely, I just noticed I hadn't seen her around since that thread, I came across another thread yesterday from the same time and again, this board and "the regulars" were getting a hard time.

I really don't understand those threads, it's not the "regulars" who are hostile, there's a few names I've noticed haven't been around, I'm hoping it's something unrelated and everyone is busy, but it must get pretty tiring having to defend yourself, time after time, to people who seem to have no intention of listening anyway.

I hope Buffy isn't gone, I'd understand her wanting a break after all that nonsebse on the other thread.

Just put a couple of 'info wanted' posts on a couple of key threads... see if that leads to anything.

She's not allowed to just wander off!

I have a lot of time for any of Buffy's posts. :)

But I'm a bit bored today. Will someone entertain me? >

So I decided to go and cook myself an early lunch. I set off the fire alarm. On balance it's probably safer if someone does entertain me.

Phew, thank goodness for that! Have a good one (if I haven't wrecked it already).

I have done a puzzle.

No stats for me. I can't face numbers. I have a pile of stuff to do that fills me with dread. And they are not even bad things.

But my lunch is delicious, burnt garlic and all.

There's two things you can do with piles of dread. One is to say to yourself 'no-one else is going to do it for me' and get on with it. The other is to leave it all till the last possible minute with that dready feeling going on (especially in the middle of the night when you can't do anything about it anyway, don't you find?). Often as not when I'm MN-ing I'm using the latter strategy.

Errol - so true!

Glad to see that Buffy is still around, I always found her reasonable.