Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

Why a lot of women don't come on the feminism threads...

999 replies

Scarletohello · 30/10/2014 22:38

So I posted this question earlier, why don't more women come on these threads ( considering how many women are on MN)

The replies saddened me. Are we doing something wrong? I remember a thread some time ago asking how many women lurk on the feminism threads but never post. I was shocked by how many women read these threads but didn't feel able to join in. I don't think feminism has to be particularly intellectual and I would like to be able to educate more women about feminism, how it affects women in many different areas of their lives, offer support and talk about what we as women can do about it.

Please have a read of this thread and tell me what your thoughts are. I want us to be as inclusive as possible as it affects us all...

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2222959-To-be-a-bit-dismayed-if-4-million-women-visit-this-site-why-are-there-so-few-posts-on-the-feminism-threads

OP posts:
ZombiePuffinsAreREAL · 30/10/2014 23:14

I can relate to that BogQueen. The careers threads aren't really where I am either.

Affordable childcare, fair pay and criminal justice are important too, if you started a thread, you'd get a really good response. In fact there has just been a thread about the lack of legal aid for women in divorce.

Hakluyt · 30/10/2014 23:14

I do find the accusations of being shouty and aggressive very odd. Unless I am really shouty and aggressive and don't realise? In my experience the prevailing mood of the feminist boards is a sort of existential despair............ I do find some of the anti feminist posters quite disconcertingly cross though...........

thatstoast · 30/10/2014 23:14

No problem, I'm probably going to bow out now as this thread has gone a bit too argumentative, for me, and also I can't type fast enough to keep up!

BonaDea · 30/10/2014 23:15

Hang on hang on. I haven't at all suggested anyone was thick. I'm reacting to the repeated suggestion that people who don't post here are intimidated because it is so intellectual.

As for the fact that I'm here posting about why I don't post... I'm just responding to the OP's original wondering as to why people don't frequent this board as much as some others.

YonicScrewdriver · 30/10/2014 23:15

"the prevailing mood of the feminist boards is a sort of existential despair.."

I'm getting that on a T shirt!

SaucyJackOLantern · 30/10/2014 23:17

I'm here now.

Does anyone have any tips on how to soothe shaving rash on your fanny?

And what's everyone's fav Marian Keyes book?

HowsTheSerenity · 30/10/2014 23:17

I've been on MN for a while and have only just posted.
For me I think it was a combination of being uneducated regarding feminist beliefs, the terminology (TERF for example) and not feeling able to contribute anything useful.

I have been caught up in the TA thread and now feel outraged, confused and also slightly ignorant.

ZombiePuffinsAreREAL · 30/10/2014 23:17

Bona, I think the people who suggested that this board was a little too intellectual were the respondents to the thread in AIBU. Scarletto was just summarising the arguments from there. I'm not sure any of us would say we were too intellectual for anyone.

Hakluyt · 30/10/2014 23:18

If you want to see aggressive, by the way, try suggesting that something might be a feminist issue on any other board. Go on, I dare you!

Coffeeinapapercup · 30/10/2014 23:19

There tends to be a bit of a party line on the boards which if you argue with is met with allegations of handmaiden-ism or being a troll.

Meh I read it but I don't agree with much of it

tywysogesgymraeg · 30/10/2014 23:20

I'm not a feminist. Which doesn't mean I don't want equality of the sexes. I just fine feminism boring.

Hakluyt · 30/10/2014 23:20

What sort of things don't you agree with, coffee?

BonaDea · 30/10/2014 23:21

Okay well to be fair no one has been that shouty here tonight.

YonicScrewdriver · 30/10/2014 23:21

"I just fine feminism boring."

That does seem a v good reason not to post on FWR and is broadly the reason I avoid the Camping topic!

SevenZarkSeven · 30/10/2014 23:22

Ah right it just felt a bit snide.

I am not sure if ops motivations but I suspect this op was formed after reading the responses on the other thread (which I also saw before this) where a few responses said it was hard to follow / a lot of intellectual wankery etc. I took it that she was thinking that was a big reason from what people said on that thread, rather than it was an assumption she'd made iyswim

Momagain1 · 30/10/2014 23:23

If they are reading but not posting, they are likely getting educated. So, your goal is accomplished.

BellaSolanum · 30/10/2014 23:24

Bona A few people on the other thread said they just didn't understand a lot of what gets said here, some said they didn't get the theory and abbreviations in particular. Don't think anyone was calling anyone else thick?

ZombiePuffinsAreREAL · 30/10/2014 23:25

True enough momagain.

YonicScrewdriver · 30/10/2014 23:25

Well, kinda. But one goal of FWR chat is to chat about FWR so it's good if everyone joins in sometimes.

SevenZarkSeven · 30/10/2014 23:25

Saucy

  1. Ouch! Answer is to stop shaving obv :D
  2. Don't know who that is, should I? ( waits to be told is no. 1 feminist author and,/or something else that I will look like a twat for not knowing about)
BellaSolanum · 30/10/2014 23:25

HowsThe Serenity I think those are the standard emotions in feminist debate Grin

BitOutOfPractice · 30/10/2014 23:27

The tone of the OP and the OP's subsequent posts is exactly why I don't even look at the Feminism section any more to be honest. There I said it!

YonicScrewdriver · 30/10/2014 23:27

Seven, she gets pastel covers, but she wrote This Charming Man, portrayal of a domestic abuser. And Watermelon.

smellycandles · 30/10/2014 23:28

I used to post on this board but stopped. I very occasionally have a read, like now.

I found it shouty, aggressive, rude... All of that.

I like to learn, and am still figuring out my feminism I guess. However these boards are not the place for that. I was constantly told I was wrong, people were basically telling me I was thick and that my feminism wasn't good enough.

It just made me think what dicks the posters were. Which is a shame because I'm not on any other forums and this is the only FWR board I know.

I have no idea who the posters were.

ouryve · 30/10/2014 23:28

I dip in occasionally, but I'm usually more involved in discussions on other subjects.

Way back in my earlier days on MN, I got quite pissed off at being told that I had no excuse for posting on the feminism board. I think it's much more open, now, though. I can't work out whether I've become more self assured in my opinions, so less intimidated, or whether the board is more open to different flavours of feminism as well as people wanting to explore issues without feeling like they are being told what to think or that they're stupid for not having considered something, previously. Perhaps a mixture of both?