Amal Alamuddin has changed her name professionally

[EhricLovesTheBhrothers]

I'm actually disappointed. Her choice blah blah but honestly. Successful women who change their names professionally always strike me as either stupid or coerced and I'm sure that's unfair I'm not really but honestly why be so committed to the concept of the obliteration of the unmarried self that you allow it to impact on your professional reputation and renown?

Agree Ehric and Laurie - a man's name never gets called his father's name, its his own name. It should be the same for women.

can all of those saying 'disappointed' please explain why they think Amal should be doing what they think she should be doing? What right has anyone to be disappointed in her? Just because someone becomes a public figure by virtue of their spouse should not mean their every bloody move should be up for scrutiny. Unless you subscribe to the DM's way of thinking, of course.

PPs have mentioned their surname as 'belonging' to their father.

When does a woman get to own her surname? After 20 years? 30? 40? Or is it always someone elses (a male's)?

My mother changed her name when she married at 18. By the time I came along 20 years later, she'd used 'his' name longer than the one she was born with. So was I given my parents' name, or just my dad's?

I didn't change my name when I got married. As far as I'm concerned, its MY name and my identity, regardless of who had it first.

I don't think discussing what she has done is wrong. I think calling her stupid and coerced is.

This makes me so sad. I took my husband's name. I'm a professional, known internationally in my field, and everyone I collaborate with seems to have sufficient intelligence to cope with my name change.

Having said that, some of the oldest establishments in the world are actually far more in keeping with modern traditions. My PhD from Cambridge was awarded in my maiden name, so technically I am not allowed to call myself Dr Married Name (although I do, daily).

River, I'm disappointed because I think its a crying shame that in 2014, a successful financially independent woman (any woman in fact) ditches the name she has used all her life to take on the name of the man she married. It absolutely sends a message that she is a part of him and that he is the 'head' of their relationship. There's nothing 'shared' about it - if they had double barrelled I could see a case for it but as far as I know, he is keeping his name while she has changed hers. I would feel the same if he had changed to Alamuddin, but of course that would never happen and a lot of people would find it ridiculous if it did.

Yy hermit - even if their mother had that (post-marriage) surname from before their birth, it's never described as their mother's name.

Novice, do you think some choices are more feminist than others?

I changed my surname on marriage because I had a very unusual maiden name (and an unusual forename) and my husband has a much more common surname. I was bullied at school and still lived in the area I grew up in. I wanted to disappear. I wanted to experience other people having the same name as me, to have some anonymity. For people to say 'oh, do you know Jane Smith?' and for it not to always be me. (not my real name obviously!)

I was sad to say goodbye to my old name but it has been a very positive experience for me to escape it. If I hadn't had such an unusual birth name, I probably would have kept it. My husband wouldn't have cared if I'd kept it.

It's a shame that I'm judged for making a decision that made my life much easier.

Men's names are their father's names too.
Why don't 50% of married men take their wives' names??
Why is it so unusual as to be almost unheard of for a man to take his wife's name on marriage?
Don't tell me that's not as feminist issue.

well, obviously it sends that message to you, but it wouldn't occur to me to ever think that about any woman who did this. You're attaching your views onto her choice.

It is her choice, but that choice is made in the context of it being the norm for women to take their husband's name, but not for men to ever take their wife's name.

Rivertam I totally agree with you.

This really annoys me, I took my husbands name when we married and the vast majority of my friends and family have done the same.
It's ridiculous to think we're all stupid and unequal to our husbands. As well as being highly insulting.
The fact that we all made the free choice to do what we wanted with our names when we marred is the important thing.

I don't understand that my name is my father's name argument at all. It is my name from birth. It's what everyone knows me as in school, at university. It's not my father's name, it is my surname, my identity. It just so happens I was given my father's surname. I could have been given mums, or it could have been hyphenated. It doesn't matter. To me, getting married doesn't change who I am. It's just that simple.

Bridget, why do you think that none of the husbands took the names of their wives?

And treaclesoda choice is what I think of name changes. It's a change of identity she is seeking. She wants to do away with her past. I don't. (And it's the norm for my culture). That's why I kept my name.

I find this debate fascinating.
Those of you who didn't change their name when you got married, what name do your children have?

Is changing your name really a free choice in a society where many people automatically assume women will change their name? Where its always the women doing the choosing, and the possibility of name changing would never occur to most men?

(I don't have a problem with individual women changeing their names. But the decision isn't made in a cultural vacuum)

I wouldn't have wanted to change from my previous identity either if I didn't associate my old name with bad memories. I did think long and hard about it, as it pretty much went against my own principles.

In strange way I'm weirdly grateful for the social norm that meant it was unremarkable, expected in fact, that I change my name. If I'd been male I'd either have been stuck with my old identity or I'd have had to change it by deed poll which would have had loads of people questioning why I'd done it. As a woman I could quietly slip off into the new me and no one thought twice about it.

All the marriage of convenience for his political career conspracists will love this as they predicted she would change her name as part of a 'deal' to make a power couple of them to further his chances

I think for Amal, changing her name was a free choice though. No one would have batted an eye if she hadn't. Lots of woman in the public eye don't change their names.