So many evil men...can't stand it

[SplitHeadGirl]

First of all, I know fully well that men will get upset at what I think and am about to say, so I would like to clarify that I am talking about EVIL men, not the good, wonderful dads and granddads and husbands and nice single blokes out there....the ones who I KNOW (my brain, not my gut, tells me so) are in a majority, but who seem to be few (is it their deafening silence?)

But any fool can see that the sheer amount of men, who are prepared to do unspeakable things to women and girls (and boys as well as other men, not to mention the vulnerable and the elderly...wow, the list goes on) is just overwhelming. I read today about Anene Booysen, and I was absolutely heartbroken, but yet not shocked. For men to be so diabolical to women is not shocking anymore, and that is men's greatest tragedy.

I have two little daughters, and a little son, and I fear for them at the hands of men. Not women...just men.

I feel like I am thinking out loud with this post, so no worries if no one feels they can respond. I just wish I didn't feel so helpless at the tsunami of male violence.

Look at Sigmund on this thread disparaging single mothers. Not a word about the fathers and their responsibilities to their children. Oh the bar is definitely set lower for men when it comes to what is expected in fatherhood.

Stop being disingenuous Pan. You post on FWR quite a lot. And we do not make male privilege fit what suits us. We'd rather it didn't exist.

oh the accusation of 'patronising' Army accompanied by swearing. I think we call that an attempt to silence, don't we?

That's not true and your privilege is showing.

Sigh!

Goodnight all.

Sorry inde, lots of men are violent towards their wives. How would you know about it? Do you think they will tell you?

Many women credit their male partners for not being violent, particularly when they've left a violent relationship. What does '1 in 4 women experience domestic violence' mean to you?

I have just found out a friend of mine has a violent partner. I had no idea until last week and I've known them for 7 years.

Oops, another anecdote! So sorry I'm sure.

Scallops - do a check if you think it worthwhile? I post here very infrequently. Don't if you cba but don't indicate I am being dishonest as a default?

The ones who are close to me I would know.

I had a friend of mine describe how her husband raped her. She didn't even know it was rape and would never categorise it as such. She is still with him. And he is still controlling and charming to the outside world in equal measure.

"The ones who are close to me I would know."

No you wouldn't.

What a nasty thread. I haven't read past page 2 because it is so full of hate. Yes, there are violent men. Of course there are. There are also lovely. kind, intelligent, funny, supportive men who don't deserve a thread full of bile. How incredibly bigoted to write about men as if they are all the same, all capable of acts of violence just because some commit such acts. How would you react if someone started a thread stating that all women are shallow/bitchy/whatever just because some are. Rediculous.

You've been on FWR since I joined 3 years ago Pan. But whatever.

The concept of privilege is a pile of wank, and can easily be debunked. The male privilege checklist for example..utter crap, only a handful of salient points.

I could list my 'privileges', I have loads.....

I can sit next to children, or hug them without being classed as a paedophile.

I can expect to be the resident parent, unquestioned.

I will not be expected to do hard labour.

I can work part time, no-one cares.

I can hit a man and it will most likely go unreported.

I could seduce an underage boy, and people will consider him 'lucky'.

I will not be charged with rape, even if I force myself onto someone.

I can be very rude to a man, and it will not be considered aggressive

I could go on and on and on.........................

But really, it's just life and the way that individuals, male and female fit into this world, depending on a whole host of factors that are unique from person to person. That's all privilege is, and all of us have it to a degree. I don't expect someone to tell me to check my fucking privilege every time I open my mouth though. And if they did, they'd get short shrift. Not being constantly told to check my privilege by privileged women is another of my privileges.

Of course there are lovely men. What's wrong with saying those men could be part of the feminist movement?

Because the feminist movement appears to be full of nasty, bitter women who start spiteful threads like this one.

Army yes I posted a fair bit in the early days of FWR - it commenced whilst I was away in RL, though was supporting the idea before I left, iirc. But you'll find very little evidence of me around here for about 18 months or so.

It would be nice for you recognise you were wrong about suggesting I have been dishonest, but I don;t think you have the good grace to do that, unfortunately.

"I can sit next to children, or hug them without being classed as a paedophile."

Because the majority of sexual abuse is carried out by men.

"I can expect to be the resident parent, unquestioned."

Not true: the primary carer will likely be the resident parent in the best interests of the child. That is often the woman as the woman is expected to do it.

"I will not be expected to do hard labour."

Because women are considered weaker than men.

"I can work part time, no-one cares."

Because women are considered to be responsible for domestic roles.

"I can hit a man and it will most likely go unreported."

Men are told that they shouldn't be 'wimps'.

"I could seduce an underage boy, and people will consider him 'lucky'."

Men are told they are obsessed with sex.

"I will not be charged with rape, even if I force myself onto someone."

You don't have a penis.

"I can be very rude to a man, and it will not be considered aggressive"

Well, I'd disagree with that.

Feminism addresses all of these things. What is your problem with feminism?

I remain baffled by how so many people seem to be taking the central message of this thread to be "all men are violent rapists". That has never even been suggested.

How can stating that simple fact that most violence is perpetrated by men be interpreted as meaning that we believe all men are violent?

I'll say it again - feminism believes in holding all people to a high standard of behaviour, has expectations that people are not animals and are fully capable of moderating their own behaviour. This view gives men more credit for intelligence and compassion than society currently does.

But yeah, sure, keep thinking we're the man-haters.

"Because the feminist movement appears to be full of nasty, bitter women who start spiteful threads like this one."

It is not a spiteful thread. It is someone reading the news.

Pan: where did I suggest you were dishonest?

This thread was started by a woman who was angry and upset at male violence. That is not an unreasonable position to take.

Absolute apology Army! It wasn't you. It was scallops who 'accused ' me of being dishonest. It came quite quickly re other posts. Again big apologies to you.

The feminist movement was started because women were upset by male violence. Feminism is a reasonable position to take.