Can you help me explain why I'm not comfortable with this

[KD0706]

To cut a long story short DHs family think I am being a loon. DH bought a calendar for his brothers Christmas present. The pictures on the calendar were women 'partaking' in brothers favourite sport, wearing bikinis and posing provocotavily. It's not a sport you'd usually trounce around in bikinis for.

I said I wouldn't wrap the present, DH could do it himself and that I thought it counted as soft porn and I didn't want DD being raised to have the attitude that women are just there to be objectified by men.

DH handed over the calendar at family Christmas and announced to everybody that it wasn't wrapped because I didn't approve of it. His family, including his mum and SIL think I'm mental because the women aren't topless and his mum keeps asking me to explain the problem.

It's not keeping me awake at night, I'm not making a huge song and dance about it. But the family, mil in particular, are mystified at me and determined to understand my reasoning/thinking.

I actually wouldnt be that bothered about the calendar

What is worse is that he essentially tried to make his family gang up on you.

He was in the wrong for making a big deal out of your disapproval. But to be honest you might have been over-reacting just a little: unless there is a lot of inherent sexism in the family, having a freakout over something minor is generally counter productive because it stops people listening when you make a more reasonable point.

I'm feeling quite defensive here, maybe unnecessarily...

I didn't make a huge fuss about the calendar. I told DH I thought it was icky and I didn't like it (or something along those lines) and if he wanted to give it to his brother in front of the family (including pre teens of both genders) he could do so but I wasn't happy about it. DH and I didn't have an argument. I didn't labour the point. I didn't make a fuss in front of his family.

Matters have pretty much resolved themselves anyway.
DH has apologised for bringing up my 'discomfort' in front of his family.
BIL and SIL have laughed in good grace at the calendar but won't be hanging it in their house as they have a pre teen boy and girl and don't think it's particularly appropriate. It has been taken as a joke present and just left at that. Everybody is happy, mil is still mystified at the whole thing.

The family in general are bemused at mil presents (the snowman with extra carrot and the big chopper boxers). But mil thinks everybody loves them. So I think she is just merrily living in her own little world.