2WW for breast clinic referral - anyone care to join me?

[OneMoreForExtra]

Referred to breast clinic yesterday after finally acknowledging I wasn't imagining the indent on my left boob. Normally I'm very sanguine and unflappy but this has me completely distracted and tearful. I've banned myself from Google (easy now as I've read everything ever published about breast indents over the last 24 hours) but have no idea how I'm going to avoid going bonkers while I wait. I don't want to talk about it IRL till I know if there's anything to talk about, but think I need an outlet. Anyone else in the same boat?

I’m not in the UK which is probably why Cherry, but we do follow nice guidelines (or the ones they want too!)

Am just hoping it’s not anything nasty, as unfortunately we don’t have a radiotherapy unit here so I would have to travel to the nearest centre and that would involve having to stay there for the duration. I’m a single parent to two - would be a nightmare.

I have no intention of being content with a little feel of my lump and being sent on my way. Just hope I don’t have to fight for more testing....

Even if it is, radiotherapy might not be necessary. It would remain your choice and your surgeon should have very specific figures to help you weigh up the options. It’s called a prognostic indicator (mine was adjuvant online) and gave % survival and recurrence rates based on your specific circumstances. Usually post surgery though - so fingers crossed you won’t need any treatment and it’s just a cyst or patch of fibrosis.

Maybe (and I’ve no idea of your coping mechanisms) it might help to plan what you might do in short term worst case scenario. You won’t sleep much tonight so might as well plan and need to consider a stay for surgery (mine was 5 days others do day surgery).Wholl have the children - could grant come out etc?
It helped me know I had most eventualities covered. Luckily it was nowhere near as bad as I imagined.

Thingy - good luck tomorrow. How maddening that you don't get the full work-up at your appointment. It's like holding your breath waiting to find out. I hope you manage to get some rest this evening.

Cherry that is the most helpful description of treatment. I'm pretty certain what I'm going to hear at my appt - nipple turning sideways and indentation don't seem to have the same ambiguity that some other symptoms can have. So I'm almost wanting to get the news over with and start dealing with arrangements. It's a really bad time at work for me to be off (I run a business) and a really bad time for the family for me to be ill (DF seriously unwell and DM at end of tether) so hearing your take on treatment is wonderfully practical and manageable. Thank you.

I'm going alone on Friday too Thingy. Partly practicalities but I think I'll actually prefer it. If DH came I'd spend the whole time making sure he was OK.

OnemoreFact . Yes I knew before I went to clinic for similar reasons. Somehow that made it easier to be told as I’d already started getting my head around it all and found my pragmatism before I went in. I went alone as I wanted to deal with it in my own time without himself fussing and flapping.

OP, I'm on the 'other' cancer support thread. We have very ungrown-up conversations about woolly knickers, toenails, pets and many, many very important things . I hope you don't need to visit us but if you do you will find much help and reassurance.

FWIW, going to appointments on your own is not unusual; many people like to digest news on their own because - as you say - they can focus and concentrate more easily. Also, many of us carry on working through treatment. Yes, a little bit of accommodation may be required but it's perfectly manageable and often preferable.

for everyone awaiting tests.

Thank you all for your support - it really does help.

Well... the day has arrived! I’m on my way! I actually didn’t sleep too bad considering - I actually overslept which wasn’t a great start and I had a little work out running for my usual bus (live rural=1 bus that gets me to work in time!)

Am going on my own, Work is only a few minutes from the hospital so if it all goes tits up (!!) I have the best managers in the world that know what has been going on and one of them would come over and give me a hug and a kick up the backside! (Worst case scenario procrastinating may have been happening!)

TQ - thank you. I have read your other thread but wasn’t really ready to post on it. Hence I been posting here! Your conversations are indeed very “in grown” up but as I am an incessant catastrophiser I thought it best I stay away for now! Although I have missed the woolly knickers bit - so I may need to hop across for a bit!

Thinking of you and hoping you’re wrong. X

I’m finished! Clinic was running early! Referred for mammo and ultrasound and he says it’s probable they will take biopsy. 3 lumps found. 2 peas (one I hadn’t found) underneath my boob and then a big mass 4-5cms by my nipple. Been warned I could be waiting up to a month , but I might get appointment this week! More waiting....

I’m sorry. That doesn’t sound ideal, does it. 4-5 cm sounds huge but my mothers was 14 cm by the time she found the courage to mention it to us. She’s alive and reasonably well some 17 years later with the breast cancer being a distant memory.

Mine was about 7cm with significant lymph node involvement and I’m not going anywhere soon. The size is less relevant than the type of tumour and the lymph node involvement. Might be the peas are cysts and unrelated to the larger mass.

Really hard waiting. Have you got a support network in case you do need to be admitted. It can all suddenly happen very quickly in U.K. although a month sounds a long time to not know. Is that because of lack of resources somewhere?

Thanks Cherry, am hating the waiting game, but hey ho there is nothing I can do at this stage but wait.

Have warned work that I may need time off at short notice (a nightmare with current logistics) and they will get cover for me. Dr did say i could be called in tomorrow or Thursday before I go away for 10 days. But can’t be sure. So now it is a case of watching my mobile at all times (a nightmare to do at work as am customer facing half the time). If not they will arrange for when I return off my hols.

As for support network - if the worst happened and I was admitted or something then my mum would move in to look afte the kids, my dad would be taxi service for the kids, so it would be fine. It already happened this year when I got sick and spent a week in hospital so I have no worries there.

Am just wishing it had been a one stop shop!

At the end of the day though, it’s just as likely to be benign rather than cancerous, so until I get al my tests done and results back I just have to try and hope for the best outcome! My big lump I am actually less worried about for some reason - it moves about easily and have a feeling that will be be benign. Have named her Agnes for the time being!

Indeed. If you can dismiss it during your holiday, then that’s a good thing. Hopefully a swift and good result.

Thingy your attitude is absolutely fantastic. I'm taking notes. It can't be much of a relief to know such partial info and I admire the way you're meeting it head-on.

TwitterQueen I think I'll be joining you for toenails and woolly knickers next week! The first page I looked at had palliative care and secondaries and I ran away in a combination of terror and imposter syndrome. My angst over the unknown is very indulgent compared to some of that so this feels like the place to fret until I graduate - it's nice to know it's not all heavy duty!

The unknown is the worst thing about it all. When you know what you're dealing with and what the treatment plan is, everything becomes a lot more manageable. It's still fucking shit of course, but you can at least grab it by the short and curlies and stare it in the face. Know your enemy.

onemore I lost it a little earlier - I caved and told my mum. First thing she said was i’ll Pay for you to go private. Got a telling off for not telling her earlier. I’m not going private - will cost in excess of £1000 easily here (that was researched weeks ago!!!!!) Instead I have got in contact with a family friend who might be able push an appt through for me a bit quicker as a compromise. She did make me laugh when she said “oh well you’ve always wanted boobs (Mine are miniscule)so you might end up with some after all!”

Your appt is on Friday isn’t it? Not long to go now for you. It is what it is, you can’t change it now. And it’s not over til the fat lady sings so don’t lay down and roll over in defeat just yet. You still have every chance of “it” being benign just like everyone else waiting for test and results.

TQ I love your gusto- I think we would be great mates if we ever met!

Thingy I love friends , though I've lost one or two along the way because they tend to make it all about the.m (eg: "but I wouldn't feel right if you didn't let me do xyz...". I'm old enough (59) not to care what people think any more. My priority is me .

It's not worth going private for cancer or suspected cancer. The treatment will be same, the consultants the same and the (2 week pathways are clearly laid out in NICE guidelines.

Having said that, I did have to go private for my radical hysterectomy last year because the hospital had apparently changed the way operations were scheduled. So despite the fact I'd had a laparoscopy and come off chemo to allow the hyster within specific dates, the bastard hospital (Churchill in Oxford btw) didn't even answer the phone to me and wouldn't schedule me within my window. I was fortunate to have private health insurance through work. I'm back on the NHS now.

OMG - tq that’s awful. Well my local hospital (and postman) is on the ball now - appointment letter was on the doorstep when I got home. 5th November for my scans. I go away tomorrow night, so that’s the first day I am back as am away all next week. So none of this “up to a month” of waiting that I was told yesterday. Just have to ignore the lumps whilst on holiday now!

Now I just need to start packing and all will be good. Going away straight after work tomorrow so need to get everything sorted before bed. Could be a late night!!!!

I have the image of TQ grabbing a boob by the short and curries while staring it in the face firmly fixed now. If I could have it made up into a poster for Friday, I would

Thingy I'm so glad you get your holiday and then no waiting for the scan! Have a lovely time and step away from the bad thinkies.

It's tomorrow at 9 am. Like you Thingy I'm calmer the closer it gets. It's rushing towards me now, I'll actually be surprised if it's not cancer, I just hope they do as much as possible at the appointment so I leave knowing some facts. Out to dinner with friends this evening which has been a very good distraction but now I feel like I'm standing on the top diving board, waiting for a signal to jump.

Lest anyone think I'm overly philosophical, I'm also on course to eat a who like packet of Percy Pigs on the train on the way home

Heya just popped on quickly to wish you luck in the morning. I hope you get some good news and can try and enjoy your dh’s Birthday.

We are off on our holidays now, but will try pop on as and when I can to see how you get on. Will be reliant on free WiFi!

The calm thing is strange isn’t it - it’s like there is no point in stressing over it all as d day approaches. What ever it is it can’t be changed now, we just have to hope for best. If it’s the worst we just have to do a TQ suggested. Please let me know how it goes xxxx