I am getting obsessed with not losing weight and it's making me unhappy.

[Bintle]

I'm mid fifties. On HRT. Either 5 7 or 5 8, not sure! Weigh 13 stone. I've put 10lbs on since beginning of December- living away from home for a week looking after an ill relative started it, then Christmas, then I injured myself (broken arm) and currently can't drive or go to the gym.

I am OBSESSED with looking fat. I won't have my photo taken at all, assume I'm the fattest person in the room. I'm worried that my dh doesn't find me attractive any more. I am constantly worrying about food.

I've started trying to walk 10000 steps a day but I've aggravated my broken arm somehow so really need to rest.

I'm drinking a Huel shake with fruit in it every morning which I enjoy. I bought this to make sure I got enough nutrients and protein to heal my arm and because cooking isn't the easiest. Lunch will be a tuna salad or some heated up leftovers. Last night we had quiche and salad for dinner then I had a skyr yogurt. Today its fish stew. I barely drink alcohol. Dd3 is doing exams and stressed so to relax she makes cakes which I'd feel ridiculous saying I can't eat a slice of cake because I'm dieting so I ate a couple of slices (delicious!). I'm obsessively weighing myself and already dreading my holiday in 6 weeks.

I have a break from the progesterone part of my HRT for 5 days and during that time I do seem to drop a couple of pounds.

It's making me really unhappy and I'm piling the pressure on myself.

I think most of us can relate to finding it much easier to be slim in our younger years. I was a size 10 in my 20s even after having a baby at 26.
By my 30s I was a size 12.
Now I’m a size 16 in my 50s but definitely not getting any bigger! I refuse to buy size 18 clothes so have to diet whenever my size 16 clothes start to feel even slightly snug. Hoping I can get back down to a 14 as Im currently dieting & slowly losing weight. I still have loads of size 14 clothes in my wardrobe.

I have a friend who has always been a size 10 (she weighs herself every week and cuts back as soon as she notices a weight gain)

This is exactly what I do. I am on HRT and haven't noticed a weight gain, but I weigh myself religiously to keep an eye out.
I haven't always been this size though, I lost 3 stone about 10 years ago and have watched my weight ever since.
I drink (a lot on occasion) have a massive appetite and am basically a greedy cow. Cake. Sausage rolls. Wine.
But because I actively watch my weight, if I've gone up a couple of pounds I'll cut back a bit the next week.
Weight loss isn't all about feast or famine, it's a moving target all the time.
I think once you've had a decent weight loss (eg my 3 stone) it's made me very aware that it's easier to lose a few pounds than it is to ignore it for months and need to lose a stone or more.

I do exercise quite a bit but I agree with a PP that it's very easy to overeat those calories that your watch tells you you've burnt (usually overestimated)

I think this sounds very sensible

@Minikievs if I get down another few stone (I've lost 2 ) this is what I will be doing. I'm ashamed to admit I didn't weigh myself for 4 years because I knew it was going far too high - it's a lot easier to lose 5lb than it is 55lb

Never done Aquafit @Twiglets1 but I think I will try it. Used to swim a lot last year but haven't this year.

I was in my NHS centre waiting for a mammo today, and I noticed a lot of 60 something women there could barely walk because they were so overweight. I really don't want to be that way in another 10 years.

I lost weight simply cutting out cakes,sweets,pop,pizza and now munch all day on fruits and stuff.it barely took much tbh

Neither do I in another 5 years, that's like a horror story with people getting too fat to easily walk.

Aquafit is great because while some people like me don't like being seen in a swimming costume, people of all shapes & sizes participate & it's more fun than just doing lengths of a pool.

That's what I intend to do too @Minikievs if I get down to a weight I'm happy with first, which for me will be a size 12/14.

Some people say it is toxic to keep weighing yourself but I think it makes sense unless you are a person at risk of eating disorders.

Apart from that cake last week I never eat any of these things.

Me too @Twiglets1 that's what I'm aiming for and will never allow myself to go 4 years without weighing again!!

fwiw I definitely put on weight through being on HRT - half a stone that I couldn't shift despite eating the same as when I wasn't on HRT. I came off it and lost that half a stone really quickly.

I do fast - not for fasting's sake, but because it's easier to stick to a lower calorie intake in two meals. I also find that once I've "woken up my stomach" I want to eat more.

I think the two most fursteisng things for me are now the sheer amount of time it takes to lose any weight-I have to really stick at it and be under strict about not eating carbs and sugar for a long time to lose any at all and it's just not sustainable because sometimes I want to have a nice dinner or a drink, say once a week and I can't even allow myself that so shite is my metabolism
And the other thing is that for a week before my period and during it I look like a lumpen mess-I gain between 3 and 6 pounds water weight and so for half a month no matter how much weight I've actually lost I still look like I haven't.

I'm the kind of person that needs to see results to motivate me to carry on-and as these seem to take ages and be scuppered every two weeks anyway I give up

Yeah. I've stuck to 1400 cals this week and this morning have gained 2lbs.

Haven't drunk, have done 16.8. Two days of 1200 calories. If I'd lost anything at all I'd be motivated to carry on.

It's a bastard OP. I'm concinced it's hormones.
I'm a sodding dog Walker. I walk three hours a day sometimes more. I eat 1200 calories often less and no carbs at all, and yet I've probably lost about 3. Pounds in the last 6 weeks. People keep telling me 'that's impossible'. But my scales, my peri belly and my still too tight summer clothes beg to differ!

I think that perfectly describes weight loss in middle age - it’s a bastard.

Then Doesn't sound like low UPF suits your waste loss hopes. Maybe you'll lose weight if you eat more crap.

or weight loss even, oops

Eat more crap… now there’s a diet I could really get behind!

Huel is highly processed and almost a third of your daily calories. There are lots of reports of weight gain with it. I would try swapping it for whole food sources of protein, eggs, meat, fish, nuts and legumes and see if that makes a difference.

Well op this will make you smile: I lost 4 pounds this week. Was feeling quite positive until yesterday when I showed up at the elderly lady I care for and her husband asked me if I was pregnant

I wear a size 12. I'm choosing to believe it's his 80 year old eyesight at fault

Yeah I'm going to ditch it. Thanks.