BigMoFos w/c 21 December

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Sounds very similar to my MIL, Jackie. She never really got over losing her husband - it was nearly 20 years ago, and she has just never moved on. She tells us that her life is dreadful, purely because she's on her own.

She also suffers with pain from arthritis, but most of her joint problems stem from the fact she just decided, about ten years ago, that she wasn't going to walk anywhere anymore. And she didn't ... but within a very short time, she couldn't walk anywhere anymore because everything seized up. She has one of these wheeled walker things (a Rollator?) but won't use it, so she never leaves the flat. Which has to be depressing in its own right.

I find a lack of exercise and contact with teh outside world hugely depressing You can generally pinpoint when I am slightly depressed as it usually coincides with my exercise levels dropping.

It's really difficult to see someone so fed up with life. I remember my mum's mum being much the same (though she lost her husband in the second world war, when my mum was a child). I remember her saying that she really wanted to die, and didn't know what the point was of her still being alive, and I can see my mum going the same way. And when I see that, I swear to myself that I won't be like that when I'm older. But I guess you never know how you're going to be.

And you're right - the less you do, the less you can do, so it's a downward spiral.

My grandmother never forgave my grandfather for dying (aged about 40). She lived for another 45 years and was unhappy for the whole time. She resented my other grandparents because they "still had each other".

What an incredibly sad way to live.

WWB - so sorry your Christmas Day was difficult. How often do you have to see MIL?

Littlefish - I think you've hit the nail on the head - there's a lot of anger there, as well as the sadness - 'how dare you go and die and leave me on my own'.

I did weigh yesterday, and was rather amazed to find that I hadn't put on any weight, though I've drunk more alcohol in the last 4 days than possibly all the rest of the year put together, so am expecting to have put on next week.

I weighed on Thursday too, and have put two pounds on. Which, given that most of my weight loss a couple of weeks ago was because I was ill, and also given that I have stuffed my face for several days, I'm not unhappy with.

LittleFish - we don't see her as often now as we used to. She used to live just round the corner and we saw her all the time, but about 18 months ago she moved to Cheltenham, so we only see her once every four weeks or so. She won't come here, otherwise it would be more often.

I am undone

Tesco's at North Harbour have introduced a Krispy Kreme do-nut concession

I'll NEVER be able to resist

......................................................................................... ..................................................soooooo.........

How many calories do I need to set aside each fortnight to allow one creme filled chocolate do-nut as a treat

• no idea. The one near us does them too. But they've put them near the door, and the thought of all those people judging me as I put them into the bag often puts me off (not always, though). If you really want to know, the US site seems to have a nutritional facts section linked to in the faq - it's a pdf, and too tiny to read, for some reason.

Ahem. Would it be OK if I re-joined...?? I've excelled myself this year and have managed to put on the 2 stone I lost 18 months ago Have been v. down and stressed at work but finally went to see my GP last week and I'm Mrs Prozac so fingers crossed will start to feel better.

Sooooo, there's no time like the present - I need to shift this weight because I'm down to about 3 things in my wardrobe I can wear (having stupidly optimistically thrown all my bigger stuff away last year).

Any room for a not so little one?!

. Lovely to see you. I think there will be a lot of us doing a new start for a new year. I've been completely static for the last year and a bit, putting on and losing the same 2 pounds.

Hi DottyDot, good to see you though I'm sorry about the circumstances!

Hi JackieNo, I don't think I'll look up do-nut calories, it'll only encourage me to feel eating them is ok...then I'll eat loads! I think I'll probably be able to avoid them most of the time too (you actually have to walk back up the shop past all the other check outs to get to them so as long as I make for the check out nearest the main entrance I'll be able to walk out without going near them!) and the occasional treat is good for the soul!!!

I havn't weighed over Christmas but I'm hopeful of a not too large increase as we've all been a bit ill with an 'orrible cough/cold so havn't really over eaten (though what I have eaten tends to have been chocolate covered!)

We've had the cough/cold too, though it waited till just after Christmas to hit DH and me. I have a nasty cold. He, of course, has 'the worst cough I've ever had - it's like a spike being driven into my chest'.

What are they like!

My DH went down with it yesterday and has spent most of today in bed, calling down for hot toddies, soup etc.

Still he did look after me very well when I had it (Christmas day!I actually went back to bed for a couple of hours in the afternoon) and he did cook all of the dinner etc. True we didn't eat until 7pm but it was all jolly tasty (what I could taste of it!)

Poor you, having it on Christmas day. I haven't had it very badly at all, just as well. At one point last night, when his cough was really bothering him, DH was lying face down on the bed, with his torso kind of dangling off the bed towards the floor - when I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to get gravity to help shift the stuff on his lungs that he wasn't able to cough up. I had to quietly to myself. And I'm not the world's most sympathetic partner, I have to say.

Dotty How lovely to see you - there's always room for you! Hope you start to feel better soon - bear in mind that ads can take several weeks to kick in, so try to hang in there until they start to work for you.

Krispy Kreme ... aaaaaaarghhhhhhh! Although I'm a bit like Jackie - the thought of people judging me is enough to stop me buying them.

Thanks everyone! WWB - it's funny but I feel calmer and more positive already and I think it's just because I've taken steps to regain some control. I know the ADs probably haven't kicked in because it's only been a few days, but I'm so relieved my lovely GP took me seriously (I'd gone to talk about having really bad PMT and he was fab - very gently got me to admit that the 3 weeks in bewteen the PMT weren't so great either..!).

Anyway, today's been good, eating-wise. I've been binge eating over the past couple of months, but today I managed to just have breakfast, lunch and dinner Having said that, I've bought some minstrels and crisps to share with dp tonight - not that we'll make it up until midnight but we might just get to watch Girl with a Pearl Earring before staggering to bed!

Dotty, I think it's pretty normal to feel more positive once you take steps to take control of depression. Well done for recognising that you needed to - I really hope that they work well for you.

I am struggling to get back onto an even keel again ... I have eaten anything I wanted to with gay abandon over Christmas, and I am finding it hard to get back on track. Roll on the new term at school; getting back to work has got to be a good thing!

Yes - I've been pretty unconstrained, shall we say, too. Haven't felt up to going for a run - well, I tried on Boxing Day, but walked a lot more of it than I wanted to.

I need to start getting more exercise pretty smartish. Walking and doing my stuff in the playground is all very well, but it's not really enough (although when I'm on skipping it's a real workout; rope attached to drainpipe at one end and me at the other, and I turn it for an hour and twenty minutes. Great for the upper arms ...!

A friend of mine wants me to join a gym with her, which would be a great way to start getting some exercise ... but I can't justify spending £350 a year on it. And I know running is free but I'm far to heavy to lumber around on the pavements!

Could you buy something to use at home, exercise bike or something? Or just bite the bullet and pay the gym membership, maybe for 6 months, and see how it goes? The skipping sounds like extremely hard work.

You have to take out a year's membership. It can be paid monthly but if you give up before the year is out, you still have to cough up for the whole year. It works out at something like £25 a month, which I guess is no more than paying Weight Watchers or Rosemary Conley class fees - but if you don't get on with it it's an expensive mistake.

I have an exercise bike but with having knackered knees, it's not something I relish the thought of! It makes a great clothes horse

The skipping is a killer ... although sometimes I cheat and let one of the kids turn (dd is always desperate to turn the rope). It's actually less hard work than being in the dining hall ... they get their money's worth out of us in there. At least skipping is out in the fresh air!

Well I got dp gym membership for christmas this year - but only dp, not me!!

Ah well, new year, new start (again)...

Happy New Year, MoFos.

Happy New Year

Happy New Year all

Right, on Thursday I weigh myself. That is Point 0. There will be a loss of roughly half a stone every month for the next four months. We will then take it from there [yeah right]

We did Secret Santa at work - about 25 people involved. My ss bought me a mahoosive bag full of Thornton's choccy - clearly someone who knows me well

Good to see you Dotty. I too threw out my fat clothes when I lost weight a few years ago. Not that they'd fit me now anyway, I'm bigger now than I have ever been.