Twix I think it's a very easy trap to fall into, to starve all day and then go berserk in the evening. It's the main reason people tend to get all po-faced on MN about calorie restriction and how it "doesn't work" - it does of course, if you actually do it, but it can so easily lead to bingeing, which realistically will quite easily counter most if not all of your restriction. It's a bit like how people often gain weight when they take up running, because they haven't quite accepted that that hard-work, agonising run which left them scarlet and huffing and sweaty probably burned off about as much as a slice or two of toast, so they haven't strictly "earned" a cheeseburger and a double chocolate muffin even if they feel like they should have!
Something you could try is shifting your main meal to lunchtime and having a small, "lunch-sized" portion in the evening. I assume evenings are your danger zone, they are for most people, so if you can shift your focus to that time of day and make dinner an "in the zone" time, you will a) not be starving when it comes around and b) may find it a bit easier to swerve the freezer. Would that work for your lifestyle?
Easier said than done, I know, but I do find that when I sit down in the evening with a plate of veg and a small piece of white fish, I feel far less in danger of drifting towards the wine than I do if I start to sink into a bigger, yummier meal.
That said, as you pointed out, if you're on a calorie deficit even with the evening treats then you'll still lose, albeit more slowly, and as I'm always saying, finding a way to lose slowly and sustainably with ice cream and wine factored in will mean that in six months you'll actually be slimmer which is the whole point, rather than hammering at a monk-like lifestyle for a bit and then giving up, meaning in six months you'll be cross, demoralised and probably the same weight or heavier. Which is obviously not the point...!