Weight loss by being kind to ourselves? *title edited by MNHQ*

[millifiori]

Holidays over. I have had my body weight in ice-creams, chips, pasties, burgers etc and though we walked about 5-10 miles most days, I'm heaviest ever.

I know I am useless at diets - they make me dizzy and weak and grumpy.

Does anyone fancy trying to lose weight with a shift of mindset? Doing loads of treat-like things that aren't food based. Eating really healthy foods we also happen to love, Being nice to ourselves mentally, physically, emotionally and socially etc. Taking exercise because it's good self care etc?

If anyone wants to try this, join in here for chat.

Today I walked back from shops with (superfit and skinny) DS1. 3 miles. This afternoon, I'm going for a walk with DS2. Going to have some salad for lunch now because I like salad, not because it's rabbit food.

Anyone else?

I've been feeling restless and out of sorts and eating non-stop (probably PMT but also using food to fill a gap, maybe). Since I'm being kind to myself I am trying to stand back and observe, rather than feel cross with myself. I like this thread.

Free - 13 mile cycle is impressive!
I'm not doing brillianlty on the exercise, but today after a few very stressful emails (about serious very sad illness in young family member) I wanted to reach for chocolate but remembered to be kind to myself instead so cuddled the cat. Must get back into the exercise routine though.

LiveLife - have you tried giving in to the precise carb craving you have? I find if I crave a chocolate bar but eat Ryvita and fruit instead, I still crave the chocolate bar and end up eating a bowl of cereal and finally the chocolate bar I craved in the first place. But if I have it, then I don't overeat for the rest of the day.

Carbs help the body produce happy hormones, so it might be easier to stick to no carbs if we start out by giving ourselves big happy boosts at the start of the day with upbeat songs, exercise and stuff that makes us smile.

Milli - I do have a cold at the moment and have been craving bread. Toast and sandwiches is all I fancy. But toast and sandwiches is the reason I have almost 2 stone of extra weight!
I want to feel healthier. I feel sluggish and weighty.

Today's plan is tea only til 12. Then a chickpea flour pancake with onion, peppers, mushrooms. A pear and strawberries for a snack.
Dahl and spinach with a small amount of brown rice for dinner.

If I can stick to that I'll be happy and will have 'reset' my cravings and appetite.

I love lentils and pulses so am replacing bread with that today!

Hello, I know I'm late to the party but could I join too?
I'm tall-ish (5'9) but much bigger than any of you (20-ish stone, which makes me feel sick to write down)

I've tried lots of things (ww, sw, orlistat, Atkins etc) and am at the very start of the journey for some bariatric surgery but there's just something in me that wants to do it myself so in the meantime, I'm going to try

I'm just going to eat like I'm already thin, I need to completely alter my mindset and not ban anything but try and see them as 'treats' rather than 'essential sit on the sofa and stuff my face every night food'

So making tiny changes in the hope that they'll be sustainable rather than going hell for leather - deciding I'm going to run 10k every morning and live on nothing but carrots and then being upset and disappointed in myself when that inevitably fails

So the plan for the first month -

Water - at least 1litre a day (never used to drink water, just coffee and Pepsi max)
No more than one fizzy drink per day
No sugar in coffee
Walk at least twice a day for at least 10 minutes
Treats to be treats - occasional indulgence not a staple diet

Hi OhHoly and welcome. I like your do-able exercise plan.

LiveLife that chickpea pancake thing sounds delicious.

I've been drinking more water and eating only healthy foods, (though still too much of them but...step in the right direction after all the ice cream, wine, crisps and pasties over summer.) Also listening to lots of feelgood music. Sounds daft but I think the music helps most. I haven't craved sugar or raided the DC's unhealthy snack cupboard (which DH restocks. I don't.) And today I skipped a glass of wine. Only slightly wanted one and decided I'd rather have a clear head and do a bit more work after dinner.

Has anyone managed to do their treats? I've done the music, the daydreaming and the funny show.

I've done my nails, and put together a play list of music from highlights of my life. I've actually come down with a stomach bug, so eating is rather by-the-by at the moment - it was nice to have suggestions for treats to cheer me up when ill. I'll try to do a pedicure tomorrow.

Travelling, you're doing brilliantly on the treats. Sorry about your stomach bug. Hope you feel better soon.

I've had a bad day today. But it's only shown me that actually I've had good days all week until now and not really over eaten at all. So, I'll get back on with the healthy eating tomorrow.

Today might be facial day. I've got a cold brewing so a facial steam might stop it in its tracks.

Gymntonic are you still around? If not I have an idea for next week's treats so am happy to do them if you're busy.

Well done to everyone on treats and weight loss. I have meant to do some treats but have had no time now school are back, same old. On the weight loss front have lost nothing this week, even though I have been very good. Really hard not to get disheartened, but think it might be down to other issues, ie not being able to go to the toilet, sorry tmi. Am determined to have a good week again and hopefully to see some weight loss progress.

Hi everyone. Back home, back to work and back to school. Decided walking would be my treat for any spare time. Managed 20,000 steps on all but two days so not too bad.
Weighed in this morning: 13 2.5. So a good loss for me. Tbf I think that's just adjustment from holiday and travelling. Still a pound down from before holiday so going in the right direction anyway.
Ideas for treats. Maybe you could add some too Milli?
Stock up on books maybe from a library or charity shop. Or download an audio book and let Stephen Fry or Ian McKellen read it to you.
Plan a local walk - Google ifootpath - and invite family/ friends to join you over the weekend
Get crafty- simple knitting, crochet, etc patterns are easy to find. YouTube for teaching/ reminding yourself f techniques
Download a mindfulness app- the NHS have one I think in their website- or practice relaxed deep breathing for a couple of minutes.

Keep on being kind everyone. Have a great week

Crosspost Octopus. Don't despair. Your toilet issues will 'clear'. Hence my 4 lb loss between Monday and today... Fresh figs are in the supermarkets

Millifiori, daydreaming was the treat that appealed most to me as I feel very stuck in a rut at the moment but didn't manage to come up with much. Are there any that you are prepared to share for inspiration?

I've had a bad week but had PMT, jet lag and back to work blues to contend with. Next week should be better and because I'm being kind to myself, I don't feel like ditching it as a failure.

Octopus - don't think about numbers, think that you've made healthy choices to value yourself and your body, and that that has been a success.
Alternatively, I can come round, breathe on you, and give you gastroenteritis!

Totally agree with Travelling, Octopus. Don't worry about the actual weightloss right now. Credit yourself for having made healthy choices this week. You could find figs, fresh coffee and a bit of senokot means you get a big weight drop next week instead.

No weight loss here this week, but no gain either. That's OK.

Steala - day dreams. Happy to share.
3 easy things I've never done and would love to:

• saw loads of weird and wonderful new soft drinks when shopping with DS1 - birch water or chia seed smoothies. Will try one this week instead of wine

• walk in the pretty park I see from the train that's in the next village along. Never been there in 10 years, because we have so many lovely walks on our doorstep. But always seen that park and wanted to explore it.
• Read a David Sedaris book. People keep quoting him at me and he makes me laugh. (Going to use Gym's treat suggestions this week to actually do this!)

3 easy things I used to love and want to do again

• yoga. I need to sign up. Not done it once since the last course I did, even though I loved every sessions.
• Learning Japanese. Ditto
• writing poems

3 things other people seem to love that I don't get but want to try

• spray tans - I'm lily white. It would be lovely to have smooth, even, golden legs just once in my life.
• really long, hard cycle rides (I like easy ones on the flat but have always wondered about London to Brighton or similar)
• craft. All my friends knit or upholster or something fabric-y. I just don't Wouldn't know where to start. But since Gym has put it down as one of this week's treats, I'm definitely going to give it a go.

3 massive life dreams

• publish a novel (I'm about 20k words into one I'm having a go at writing right now. Loving doing it.)
• walk the Camino del Rey in Spain - I really really want to do this. First saw it years ago, on holiday with DH, who (quite rightly) begged me not to go on it because it was so rickety and dangerous. But they've renovated it now and I'd love to do it so much.
• remodel our house. It's a state. Not been retouched much, apart from the occasional lick of paint since we first moved in. We need £££ to do what I'd really love to do. But I could make some Pinterest pages.

Steala they're all pretty personal, but that was the sort of thing. I try and look at various aspects of life - like fitness, travel, family, home, work, etc and daydream ideas for good changes in different aspects of life, so that ideas of all shapes and sizes crop up.

Gymntonic those are brilliant treats. Thanks for the list. Already planned two of them as they fit in wiht stuff from this week's daydream list.

I have a challenge for everyoen this week. bee meaning to do it myself for years and never got round to it, but here goes:

Which bit of your body do you hate most? Bum? Stomach? Thighs? Lovebomb it this week.

Focus on taking really good care of the bit you like least, e.g. with target toning exercises, massages, body scrubs or lotions, planning outfits that are most flatteirng to it/most confortable to wear. Just be nice to it. It's not going anywhere, so may as well.

Sorry for all my rubbish typos.

Gymntonic - 20k steps a day is amazing. I did that on holiday most days and found it knackering. it's about 7-10 miles a day isn't it? Good for you.

Well done everyone on your achievements and your self kindness!

I'm weighing in at 12St 3 3/4 lbs, so a very small drop from last week. I think it would have been more but had delicious meal out last night and over ate, no regrets as I enjoyed every mouthful! so much better than boredom snacking or eating rubbish just because it's there...

I enjoyed music and the baby groot video, as well as a bath. Didn't manage all the other treats though, looking forward to a library or charity shop visit this week! I downloaded the headspace app she's ago but haven't actually used it yet so will get on that too.

Happy to suggest next week's list if that's OK?

Sorry that was a quick update before I went out, excuse typos!

I also looked up some healthy delicious recipes that I'm batch cooking this weekend, roasted some beetroots for borscht today. I love beetroot

How did your reset day go @LiveLifeWithPassion?

Well done on 20,000 steps @gymntonic! My steps have gone down as I'm temping at the moment and the current job is a 45min drive, I was smashing it when I was working a half hour walk away!

Love the daydreams @millifiori I've just signed up for a creative worrying course, I'm hoping it inspires me...

I sometimes do yoga with Adriene on youtube, not the same as a proper course but there are loads of videos at different levels, might be worth a look?

Brilliant, thanks. Masonbee is coming up with next week's treat list.

I'm looking forward to this week's treats as well. Had the walk today already. Dragged family out and we went and explored some woods we've not walked around before. Found red and white toadstools like they have in cartoons - never seen them for real before. As soon as we got back it poured with rain, so was really glad we'd made the effort to get out.

Lovely ideas from everyone. Managed not to break yesterday despite weight disappointment. Did eat a bit more, probably about 1500 calories but no junk and was busy all day painting and doing housework. Decided to take the mind set that I would be kind to myself by not failing as I didn't deserve to feel that bad about myself. Know that sounds a bit wierd but it worked.

Hi everyone just catching up. Think I may have lost a pound. Treated myself to some soft dried apricots yesterday. Love them. High in calorie but good for you. Have to be soft ones though. Started a fab new book with an author I've not read before. Taking kids swimming later. DH and I will take it in turns to go in sauna hot tub on our own so that will be a nice treat. I've also started doing Ocado shopping. It's a revelation. No more dragging kids round the hell that us Tesco on a Saturday morning! Husband going away with work for ten days next week so am going to eat all the things he hates. Such as seafood!

Sorry I've had a username change but was on here before! So starting tomorrow kids are back to school properly and I have a Monday off. Free time between 9 and 3. Work is crazy busy but I'm going to try not to work tomorrow. Not sure what to do. Might be meeting a friend for lunch. Im craving alone time as haven't had any for u weeks and I absolutely love being on my own. Also want to do some exercise but not sure what. I have a bike, a running machine, a fitness DVD. Might try and do one today but not the fitness DVD as I don't want to do that in front of anyone! Love all the ideas on this thread especially the music one.

Watched (most of) the Gillian Riley TED talks on choosing to eat less rather than following rules. It seems a simple difference but makes sense to me. Much kinder to oneself too and powerful for weight loss too. I think the mental aspects of weight loss are so easily overlooked. Has anyone read her books or used her ideas?

Gymntonic , that TED talk sounds really good. I'll look her up. I noticed a big change this week. When DH and DC were raiding their cupboard for crisps and snacks I had no urge to join them. Normally I only have to see someone open a bag of crisps to have an overwhelming urge for one too. But not this week. I wonder if that's to do with other treats and ways of looking after ourselves. As Octopus said, it's about the mindset we have for ourselves. Being nice by not overeating feels very different from denying/starving yourself.