How can I lose 10lbs before my holiday on, er, Monday?

[WhatsGoingOnEh]

In a panic. Was meant to start diet in May but one thing (or rather, one pizza) led to another and now I've got less than a week.

I'm 5'6" and look great at 9st 7. This morning I was 10st 11! Shiiiiiiiit!

What can I do? I really REALLY need to crash some of this off. I don't care if it's unhealthy, it's only for a few days and I can do it properly when I get home.

Any and all ideas MASSIVELY gratefully received. What are your tried and tested tricks? Thank you!

Thanks Zucker. Just ate a stick of celery while waiting for the toil and bubble. It made my tongue go numb. A mild allergy or is celery poisonous?

I think we know the answer.

Ooh I wish they did do shitters coffee. Id love that. And shitters squash.

What I do in moments of desperation is hop on the scales before putting my contacts in.
So when I squint I can make out whatever number I want.

Feel free to borrow when needed.

That's ages Cat, we'll nag you into losing weight if all else fails.

Is shitters coffee not just really strong proper coffee?

Going to have another detox tea [scared]

I'm not looking forward to getting on the scales when I get back from hols. The main constituents of my diet have been ham, cheese, hazelnut chocolate, pistachio nuts, cava, alioli, coffee and crisps. Oh and peaches.

This thread is getting to me as DH clutched his stomach and ran to the loo yesterday. And I was envious. I thought damn, why didn't I eat the veal sausages.

@Itsfab. A loss is loss indeed. Well done.

Waves to everyone else.

Happy hols OP.

I did the Jason Vale 7lbs in 7 days juice malarkey 2 years ago and the weight just fell off.

I lost over a pound a day for the first week (and I cheated by having a healthy evening meal instead of just juice) and within 2 months I'd lost 1.5 stone.
we then had to deal with a stressful house sale and move, and I put it all back on, but we'll just ignore that part

This is mine.
No need to buy the tea with it.
maigrir-comment.fr/methode-gesta/

Has anyone ever had a colonic?

They come up on groupon from time to time.
I used to work with a bloke that had it done, and the weight just fell off him for a couple of months afterwards.

Not sure I am brave enough though

I'm on holiday. With my scales. :) I weighed earlier and it was 10st 13 (FFS) so I might stop doing daytime weigh-ins.

Food has been faultless! Soup, then tonight everyone else ate pork n beans while I had a mountain of salad and the smallest tin of tuna you can buy.

Drinks, however... Not so faultless. A gin and diet tonic. 1.5 4oz baby bottles of white wine. Now a HUGE vodka with soda and a tiny splash of lime. That's all i'd be allowed on the Drinkers Diet.

In other news, I can't tell if my fiancé is going off me! How can you tell? He got REALLLLLLY grumpy in the car coming here, which has never happened. I'm dying to have a Deep Tawk with him but I think it might be better to pretend I don't think anything's wrong.

:(

I love you girls, I'm so glad you're here. Hic.

Is the flooring different? The flooring the scales are on that is? Daytime weighing is bad anyway, only first thing, naked and after going to the toilet.

Am sure boyfriend is fine most people find long car journeys stressful.

Whatsgoing, maybe just drink more vodka instead of tawking?

Could he be feeling discombobulated by you bringing the scales on hols, like they're the third person in your relationship? Are you hugging them?

If he kicks off just slur something like, love me love my scales. Maybe he's worried you'll appear on a C5 documentary along the lines of 'The Woman who Married Her Scales'.

.

Please can you guys help me??? I'm a seasoned crash dieter but I've lost my way lately & after putting my body through 2 years of failed fertility treatments it is now getting its revenge...

I'm only a bloody bridesmaid on Saturday & I just tried the dress on & I can't get the bloody zip up I daren't force it in case it breaks [Hmm]

All I've eaten today is 1 slimfast, 1 cup of tomato soup & 3 dry krackawheat. Oh and a peach.

I tried to buy slimtea today but tesco have sold out of anything likely [Hmm] will twinnings detox tea do instead?

Pfft even my didn't work

Scarlett I'd ditch the krackawheat and have a banana instead.

.....then I found a load of clean clothes stuffed in his wardrobe... Time wasted, dryer electricity wasted....

Feel fat tonight.

OP your Boyf has not gone off you. He is annoyed the car journey is taking so long as he wants to jump your bones NOW!

Whatsgoing, if he comes between you and your scales then LTB.

The slimtea in Holland and Barratt also contains Senna. Using laxatives too often can cause the bowel to become dependent on them and stop working properly on it's own. The weight you lose is water which will go straight back on.
This is reading like a pro anorexia site.

Hardly .

Oh, sod off allmyhopeisgone. You were here on day 1 declaring you didn't think it was funny. Bye bye.

I've had another vodka. I asked fiance to bring me a glass of water too but he forgot. SEE? SEE WHAT I MEAN?

If he doesn't love me tonight he's going up hard me tomorrow when all this booze and the crispy-coated peanuts :( kick in and give me a gunt like a football.

Oh FFS. I'm meant to be having a brilliant time on holiday and I just wish I was back home!

Scarlett! You can't lose weight eating carby crisp breads. Look up thread for the link to the James Duncan diet. Do that for a week and the dress will fit perfectly. :)

You better start enjoying yourself as I wish I was still on holiday and weighed what you do so snog your fella, eat the crisps and stop moaning.

.

Oh FFS.
Weight is weight, water or fat or whatever.
All it matters it's is off.

Wah dammit I knew I'd failed already

In my defence the krackawheats I ate were the little crackers you're supposed to have cheese on them but I eat them dry to stave off the carb urges I am a carb junky so they help me wean off the hard stuff...

Can't follow a plan properly this week as am away with work the next 2 days so am improvising with slimfast soup & fruit. And detox tea. And pretending I have developed an alcohol allergy.

I just took the dog for a brisk walk, does that cancel out the crackers?

Love the idea of taking scales away on holiday, I wonder if luggage scales would do the same job?