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Weight loss chat

A space to talk openly about weight loss journeys and challenges. Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. You may wish to speak to a medical professional before starting any diet.

BigMoFos Week 12

138 replies

WigWamBam · 27/07/2006 11:36

New week, new thread, new ooomph to get some more weight shifted

OP posts:
WigWamBam · 31/07/2006 20:41

I'm cutting down on portion sizes, and cutting out all the crap that I routinely used to plough my way through due to boredom/loneliness/depression/odd relationship with food. One day I also plan to address my odd relationship with food somehow too, because I think that unless I do that, the weight will never stay off. I'm flirting with the GI diet (suejonez posted a link on one of the threads about it) but need to knuckle down and start to understand it all properly!

OP posts:
scotslass · 31/07/2006 20:54

Hello everyone, I've been pointed in your direction and wondered if I can join you all?

I've been overweight for most of my adult life, but can't seem to get any control over it and am now about 16st ( I think), so I have 5stone to lose.

I am going to try slimming world tomorow night so hopefully I should be in a bikini for next summer...oops fogot about the stretch marks so maybe not!!

I look forward to becoming thin and gorgeous alonside all of you

WigWamBam · 31/07/2006 20:56

How do, scotslass! Nice to have you aboard

Thin and gorgeous ...

OP posts:
JackieNo · 31/07/2006 21:04

Hi Scotslass. Glad my link worked.

coppertop · 01/08/2006 05:24

An early morning welcome to you, Scotslass.

suejonez · 01/08/2006 09:32

wotcha doing that early Coppertop?!

schneebly · 01/08/2006 09:35

Scotslass - are you me? lol - sound very familiar! Where do you live? (am also a scotslass!)

suejonez · 01/08/2006 10:22

"boredom/loneliness/depression" WWB

I'm sure we can all identify with that, does anyone have a solution or approach that works for them? I think the reason I'm struggling to lose consistently at the moment is that i'm down about the adoption at the moment. Interestingly the first thing my mum said when I went to see her on Sunday was "sit down I'll make you somthing to eat". As if thats a solution! No prizes for spotting where I get it from then!

I was mid afternoon - wasn't due for anything to eat and would have been quite happy with a cup of tea until she said that. When I'm feeling OK I just say No thanks I'm not hungry but suddenly buttered toast seems like the best idea anyone had all month!

Not going to be a good week again at this rate!

WigWamBam · 01/08/2006 10:30

Your mother is my mother, sue ... although I think we've already established that one!

I don't know how we get around something like this, something that's so ingrained. This is why it's so hard to diet - even when I'm not hungry I just have this "need" for something in my mouth, it's a craving that's almost as physical a need as hunger is.

It's the food = love thing again, I think - maybe we need to find other ways of liking ourselves.

God, it's depressing sometimes!!

OP posts:
suejonez · 01/08/2006 10:41

Has anyone tried hypnotherapy? I have done it to get me back into doing exercise many years ago and it worked very well, probably why I don;t have any problem getting out to the gym even now. I wonder if it would be strong enough to overcome years of conditioning re food=love. It's quite expensive from what I remember though.

scotslass · 01/08/2006 10:55

Thanks for the welcome everyone.

I actually live close to the sussex coast schneebly, but am originally from the ayrshire coast (like the seaside. I moved south for uni 15years ago. Where do you live?

I'm feeling a bit nervous about tonight, but at least my dh will be doing the diet with me - being a bit of a porker himself!!

schneebly · 01/08/2006 11:21

Am across the water from Ayrshire coast - Kintyre! We nearly moved to Sussex last year lol! DH was up for a job in Rye. Don't be nervous about SW -me and my DH go to and it is fab! See how similar!?

Littlefish · 01/08/2006 14:10

Hypnotherapy sounds interesting SueJonez, but I've never tried it for weightloss. A friend of mine was a hypnotherapist and did a couple of sessions with me, to help me address some issues in my past which were continuing to haunt me.

I remember feeling incredibly relaxed, but still aware. He asked me to explain the "scene" in my head. That's how it felt, like I was narrating a movie scene. The next bit will sound really silly. He got me to replay the scene, but add an additional character - for me, this was Mr Ben - do you remember him, the one with the man in the fancy dress shop!!! Now, whenever I start to think about that time in my life, a little Mr Ben comes walking across the middle of it which makes me smile.

That scene no longer holds the same pain when I think about it. His method enabled me to think about the issues without being disabled by the grief.

I've no idea whether hypnosis for weight loss would include this method. I'm sure there are different approaches.

I found the hypnosis itself very unthreatening, very comfortable, and not weird at all.

I'm continuing to have counselling and feel that I'm really starting to get somewhere. I have become incredibly aware that my eating really is just a reaction to my emotions and that the emotions from my childhood continue to rule my life today. Very, very slowly, we are unpicking those emotions and sending them away with recognition, love and time to grieve.

suejonez · 01/08/2006 14:20

I understand what you mean Littelfish becuase my exercise hypnotherapy wasn't dissimilar - had to imagin myself wearing a really colourful swimming costume splashing about happily in the water then imagine my sofa at home, every time she clapped her hands I had to imagin the positive colourful swimming image leaping out of the sofa. Sounds mad but it really did work, I completely stopped coming up with excuses for going to aqua and genuinely see it as being something positive. It also made me understand the importance of positive colour (rather than most of us who swathe ourselves in black and dark colours) and I now only buy coloured swimsuits not black if I can possibly help it. (and before anyone claims that black makes you look slimmer - do you think anyone is fooled when your 20st plus?! )

I also found hypnotherapy very relaxing, more like meditation.

Interestingly the woman I saw couldn't get me to do something I didn't want to no matter how hard she tried. We decided to try to confront the issues I have with my father but once hypnotised I clenched my fists, shut my mouth and wouldn't be budged! So stubborn!

Littlefish · 01/08/2006 14:24

The issues with your father must be very painful ones then Suejonez. So sorry.

Do you think they contribute to your problem with your relationship with food?

Littlefish · 01/08/2006 14:25

I'm sure that a black swimming costume would make me look thinner, but only if it went from neck to ankles. Oh yes, that's called a wetsuit.

suejonez · 01/08/2006 14:41

Lol - can blame my father for many things but my weight isn;t one of them.

I think it was more to do with the fact that our troubles were very fresh at that point and really far too raw to be exposed to the air.

He walked out about 10 years ago (literally left a note and didn't come back from work one day) and I haven't seen him since. It's a very long story but as he and I were (I thought!) close so his complete lack of contact with me was incredibly painful especially as he has seen my brother and sister since (though not on good terms with them). At one point he told them that he had changed his will to leave all his money (all 50p of it) to his grandchildren which was massively painful to me as I was in the throes of failed IVF treatment at the time. I went into hospital for a cancer biopsy about a year after he left and he never contacted my sister to find out what the results were, I guess he thought someone would let him know if they were bad!

Of course I know that he probably felt guilty, that he probably had some kind of mini breakdown (though not so much that he couldn;t work or find a new partner) but knowing and feeling are different things. He rings me about twice a year now and says vaguely that we must meet up and he'll ring me to arrange a date (HONEST GUV!)

I deal with it know by accepting that he is a different person to the Dad that brought me up, that whatever he went through ten years ago made him a different person who is less interested in having a close family. I think about it more at the moment, thinking that my child will miss out on having a Dad and a Grandpa. He feels more like a distant uncle to me now - Xmas and birthday cards but no more. I just grieve sometimes for the Dad I lost.

suejonez · 01/08/2006 14:46

and isn;t it a sign of how "safe" I feel on this thread that I have rambled on about that!

suejonez · 01/08/2006 17:49

thats shut everyone up!

JackieNo · 01/08/2006 20:06

Sorry, suejonez - just off swimming with DD and then doing the whole supper/bed routine. Don't really do virtual hugs, but if I did, you'd be on the receiving end . Men have a lot to answer for, don't they. Sometimes good, often bad.

scotslass · 01/08/2006 20:31

Have just got back from my first sw class and the news was worse than I'd feared. 16st 1 1/2lbs!!! how the blinkin 'eck did that happen????

Will need to do a major shop tomorrow to replace all my rubbish food with virtuous healthy green stuff.

Am off to have one last unhealthy take-away (for a while anyway!)

MrsJohnCusack · 01/08/2006 20:34

sue
I think it's brilliant that this thread is a 'safe' place. it's fast becoming mine too, even though I don't post that often....

that sounds v.difficult about your dad and I think it's very true that he's not the same one you had growing up - definitely something to grieve I think. I've got nothing useful to say - sorry!
the hypnotherapy sounds very, very useful. I couldn't get into a swimming costume for the life of me - and I would love to go swimming, on my own and with DD. I've managed it once since she was born . I might look into it, I really might

WigWamBam · 01/08/2006 20:42

I think it's fabulous that the thread is a safe haven where we can all say pretty much what we like and know there will (eventually!) be either a sympathetic ear or a hefty size 8 applied to the backside, depending on what's needed at the time! It has certainly become somewhere where I feel very comfortable posting things that I wouldn't talk about anywhere else.

The situation with your dad does sound difficult, and I can completely understand your feelings. The person you knew isn't the person he became, and I guess you've had to grieve for the loss of the man you knew and loved at the same time as having to cope with the changes in him. It's a very sad situation where no-body wins.

The hypnotherapy stuff does sound interesting, might have to see what I can find locally. I do know a hypnotherapist but I'm not sure I would respond very well to her as I know her too well.

OP posts:
suejonez · 01/08/2006 21:12

I presume the hefty size 8 refers to shoes not clothes

Oh and in my case size 9

Mrs JC, shame on you, if I can put a swimming costume on three times a week and walk from the changing rooms to the pool whilst being overlooked by the fit young men in the gym then you can - you're far smaller than me. Get off your arse and get in the pool (you too WWB - get bck into the gym).

The exercise is FAR more important than our egos!

Here endeth the first sermon...

MrsJohnCusack · 01/08/2006 21:17

thank you suejonez!
I know it's utterly, utterly pathetic. I have made excuses so many times now that I think the rest of my antenatal friends have given up on me.

I might hang out here for a bit. I normally/hate all the whingeiness of people saying they feel they can't post on threads/people are unfriendly bla bla bla but actually at the moment I seem to keep saying the wrong things and descending on threads that turn to crap in front of my eyes - see, it's safe here and I can say that - I hope. I am too hormonal and some of the posts have made me feel quite tearful - feel I'm losing my personality and confidence a bit (on here I mean). pathetic maybe, but that's how I feel.
Think it may be time to take a bit of a back seat, at least until hormones settle a bit. but I am not & never will be a flouncer!

oh ramble ramble - sorry. Still haven't put on any more weight