The Big Fat List and the Days of Doom (TM)

[BlooferLady]

You lot! Over 'ere! Sorry for taking liberties with the previous thread: I am no good with suspense, and it was like looking at a gigantic throbbing pustulating boil and not being able to squeeze it

I gained about 3 stone each time in pregnancy , the second time I was trying to minimize weight gain - and for a while it looked like I wasn't going to go above 2 stone, well that went tits up!

I believe for very heavy women they recommend a kind of half way house between dieting and not -with the aim of not gaining more than 1 stone, so realistically by the time baby is born, and you have lost all 'fluids' a week you may have lost a little weight ? My MW's never mentioned my weight though - even though they really should have!

I would recommend getting in the best shape you can before a baby - pregnancy really does take its toll on your body - but saying that I did ignore my own advice both times !

lucked sounds more fun

Bloof Being overweight during pregnancy is a risk, sure, but my advice is to carry on TTC, and as and when you are blessed with a little parasite, keep going with SW to ensure you remain as healthy as possible. This is a healthy way of eating, and results in weight loss too. I know of someone who weighed 8 stone and put on another 8 stone during her pregnancy - that to me is more dangerous than a big bird getting a bit bigger.

I did not break any beds, but did have a horrendous delivery. I have no way of knowing if that was due to my size or not. I do however know that pg2 was harder than pg 1, I was heavier, older (obviously) and had a toddler already. I would not consider having another until I was slim, but I say that in the blessed position of having 2 children.

After I had DD2 I weighed less than when I got pregnant, as I was sick from conception to birth! She was 10lb 3oz.

Hmph, that's helpful Nora....I just looked up a calcumalator thing and it said a woman of my height and weight should only gain about a stone. it's a tough one. I am overweight but not unhealthy or unfit, but you're right, it'd be good to be rather lighter before it starts. It's just - well: you can imagine - when you've been TTCing for nearly a year and a half with no joy you're disinclined to put a stop to it all until you're a size 12! Oh - quick disclaimer - all tests been done and my weight is not affecting my fertility (I ovulate like the clappers and don't have PCOS or any other ishoo).

Oops, crossed with Stink - blimey. Gaining your own bodyweight cannot be good - that's one heck of a yo-yo . I nearly typed 'maybe I'll luck out and get awful morning sickness', but having seen good friends suffer absolute torments of sickness I thought I'd best not tempt the fates....

Nora I already have two lids like that! Gosh the 4 year old is driving me crazy - ready for School me thinks.

bloof - I really hoped for nasty morning sickness second time around!!! Didn't work

Stink - hahaha I SOOO know how you feel.... mine was ready to be at school this year... so annoying for her and us - she's been quite hard to manage the last few months

Bloof - I was just under 17 st all the way through last time. Not ideal, but I thought if I waited until I'd lost the weight it would never happen. Postnatally I was 15 st 6. I think not drinking much and limiting some of the smellier cheeses for 9 months helped! I went off 'nice' chocolate (but was always at the vending machine at work for a Twirl) but had a huge appetite for fruit.

So not everyone gains weight, think it very much depends on the individual, & luck. Some women I know who really gained weight - I suspect it was the first time in years they had eaten "normally". (But then what do I know of normal...)

Didn't have morning sickness, thankfully I had 2 healthy pregnancies, not great deliveries, but good recoveries. So keep TTC!!

Sadly breastfeeding has not helped me loose weight - I have put 10lb on due to the excess appetite. Which is why I am here now, trying to ignore the cravings.

Breastfeeding helped me - until I stopped! Last march I was 13st 10!

Hello all, have been so very busy doing lovely things for last few days and rushing around like mad woman 18 hours a day. Have found this new thread now, and had quick read through

Stinkypinky and Mummynoseynora I know exactly what you mean about hyperactive 4 year olds. Mine has worn DH out today (I spent the afternoon gardening in peace). She is so ready for school in September, not that I want her to go, but I can see she'd benefit enormously from it.

Bloofer in your position I'd crack on with TTC now, never mind about losing the weight. I was about 14 and a half stone when we had our first IVF, resulting in DD. Put on 3 stone during pregnancy, mostly water and baby I think as I'd lost all of it within 2 weeks of birth. The only health issue I had was pelvic girdle pain/SPG or whatever it is called now in the last few weeks, but I've no idea if this is weight related or not. Nobody made any tutting sounds or drew their breath in sharply when dealing with me either, so I can't have been that exceptional.

Have had lovely time over past few days, but would very much like to get into the groove of Alpine and Stinky in that my body is a temple, to be filled with healthy nutritious food and NO MORE WINE.

nora -

Probably the increased appetite and my lack of willpower was a recipe for disaster.

Bloof - I lost weight during preg as went off takeaway/fried food etc etc. And I was so busy running around in work I didn't have a chance to eat. Plus I ritually puked every morning while brushing my teeth for 17 weeks. I craved (and ate my body weight) in porridge. I def bloomed during preg and miss my bump now!

Yesterday started off well. Went to the pub and had baked fishcakes and sald for lunchbut followed it up with 4 White wine spritzers ( over a 6 hr period so you don't think I'm a drunken mummy) and a takeaway pizza for tea. I'm a larry lightweight post pregnancy and can feel the affect of those White wines this am. Actually did not enjoy the pizza as it was greasy and salty so feel horrid now.

Need to go bk through the thread andcatch up on other news!

As pay back for last night I'm having 3 syn free days ... Crikey!

Brunch: poached egg on toast, baked beans, tomato and mushroom
dinner: turkey tarragon and pea frittata.
Snack: fruit

exercise: Gym!

Bloof: my weight did not affect my preg or labour in any way. Straightforward pregnancy with some lower bk pain. Long labour, needing to be induced but that was cos me bloody waters broke at 37weeks and labour took it's time to get going. I was consented for a Csection as baby ended up getting distressed after a 48hr labour but managed to push her out 10min later! You need to be as physically fit as possible I think so it's worth getting in shape for. It just helps your body cope with the physical demands of carrying a little un.

How's the studying going? It took us a long time to conceive mainly cos we both work long hrs and finding the time to shag was tricky. One month we had a lot of sex and ka-boom baby! I think we had sex 4-5times a week for 2months after 10months of just doing it when ovulating. Good luck with it - it's so hard when your studying etc.

Duck - we won't kick you off the thread but get bk on the bkaddy horse. ( says the woman who ate 1/4 metre pizza last night)

fuck - I'd gladly help you pack. T'is my favourite OCD tendencies thing to do. Make a good list, lay clothes in piles on bed eg daytime T shirts/ swimmers/ evening dress/day dress,pack things nice and neat in an orderly fashion. I'm slightly like Monica from friends, just less thin. Although she WAS fat so maybe that will be me in 1 yr time!

Slightly nervous about going to the gym today. Am worried the trainer doing my induction will laugh me out the gym....

bloof I put on a little over 2 stone and when I got home from hospital I was less than a stone more than I was pre-pregnancy - however the bastard drugs they had me on made me put on a stone immediately afterwards and I suspect made me put some on in hospital itself, so I'd love to know what my post c-section weight really was.

I ate a fair amount, but in my usual style, puked nearly every day so not much really stayed down. Most people didn't know I was pregnant, I saw a friend the week before I had him who had no idea I was pg and our neighbours were stunned that we came home from hospital with a baybee - the must've thought I was one of those crackpots who "didn't know they were pregnant". I think this is just my shape though, I'm naturally flat-stomached for a fat bird so my bump probably just looked like a chubby tummy and it never stuck out more than my boobs. I resorted to wearing a t-shirt with baby feet on it to give people a hint! But then my mum didn't show either and only wore maternity clothes because she'd put the effort in at the sewing machine and made them! Horse-riders abs flab apparently.

cheese I'm the worst packer ever. :( I get all stressed out and end up packing a ball-gown and 52 pairs of socks to go camping (plus eye-liner, blusher etc.) and then for a posh weekend away I'll have timberlands, combats and one solitary faded t-shirt with a hole in it. :(

This "just have your passport & creditcard" myth needs to be de-bunked because it's making people like me look like trampy disorganised twats!

Ha- I pack for every scenario. An outfit for having dinner with George clooney / an outfit for an evening on a yacht/ in case I decide to use the hotel gym....so pack way too much. Prob going to have to restrain myself now I have to pack for DD! Dh is more simple - shorts teeshirts boxers boardies flipflops...done!

Thanks so much for all your advice re. les bebe. I think you're right, it'd be daft to put it off eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeven longer given my weight's unlikely to be affecting owt. I'll just carry on as I am and focus on being fit and healthy. The OM keeps pestering me to do more and more crunches: I think he read somewhere that firm abs = more manageable bump and easier labour . Fortunately, and oddly enough, my abs were the only muscles that the PT thought weirdly strong. let us not dwell on my kitten-like strength elsewhere!

Cheese studying is a bit of a 'mare to be honest. Yesterday I ended up getting so tense and wound up I was snappy and wretched and had to be turfed out of the house. We went to the river and managed to arrive just as a boat had to get Tower Bridge to open up - defy anyone to be a total mard watching that happening! Given that current medical advice is that it's purely a matter of statistics, I reckon once this is all over and I'm not permanently sleepless and rigid with strain it'll maybe start looking up.

Right, food for today! Doing EE, and need to save syns for this evening (the choir I sometimes sing in has a gig, and I'll prolly have a G&T)

Break: fruit, yogurt, All-Bran (HEA)
Lunch: pasta and roast veg and feta (HEA)
Dinner: smoked mackerel kedgeree and asparagus

Am jealous of people having something to pack for!

Sunday morning....sausage sandwich (complete with trashy thick cut white bread) scoffed and still no packing done and no likelihood of getting any done as I'm off out all day at a charity event. Cheese, I will try my best to employ your packing advice but I fear that it is based on the assumption that you know where everything you might need is to start with. Organisation in the home is not my strong point.

Reading all your TTC advice with interest. I have, thus far, have had no desire for marriage or children but I hit 35 last month and the biological clock that I was sure was a myth seems to have been wound up to the hilt. I have no idea how DP feels on the matter because we have never really discussed the prospect of children as I was always quite firmly against the idea. I'm still not sure that I absolutely, defintely want them either; but I feel like I need to at least explore the idea bit further while there is still time. Terrified of DPs response...if he says that actually he'd quite like kids then I'm fucking petrified of what lies ahead. On the other hand, if he says no, no way, never...well, I don't know whether I'll be relieved (as in...Decision made. Done. Move on with our lives) or sad and resentful...which would be totally unreasonable on my part as it's been 100% my decision so far to not even entertain the idea.

Sorry, I'm rambling.

And this is not furthering the packing efforts.

Enjoy the rest of your Sunday, ladies.

Fuck, here are my thoughts on TTCing and families, to be taken or left - no idea if they're helpful!

I never wanted children. Don't like babies, don't like kids. Got 10 nieces and nephews and have had ample opportunity to witness how awful it all looks up close . Frankly, I view those women who SIMPLY ADORE BABIES!!11!!1!!!! somewhat askance. Am ferociously ambitious. There is much i have yet to achieve. The idea of my world dwindling to nappies and drawings pinned to the fridge makes me want to vomit. The idea of being pregnant is unappealing. The thought of BF makes me all ooooooogly (though since it's free and convenient I would like to give it a go, should the chance arise!). But then something happened and I realised I was looking at it all wrong. I was focusing on the babies and the toddlers, and the isolation and PND and lack of career and all that. When actually what you're doing if you have children is setting up a totally different sort of future - one with the small milestones of others' lives, and sort of expanding your world a bit. So when I think about TTCing I rarely (if ever) fantasise about, Oh I dunno, smelling babies' heads or whateverthehell it is those women on NetMums seem to go in for, but I think more long-term, about school plays and Christmas mornings and having a DIL to hate

That's not to say that that future is for everyone and it might well not be for you. Lots and lots of people have very happy lives shaped quite differently from all that, and it might even be that I have to live a life that doesn't look like that. But it did help me to stop focusing on the first 2 or 3 years (the thought of which STILL brings me out in hives) and look at the next 20 or 30 instead. Um. I'm rambling now, soz!

Urgh, I am utterly starving, so to forfend eating lots of syns I'm going to switch to a Green Day, thus gaining myself an extra HEB so I can eat some of the stewed apple singing to me from the fridge.

this means today is:

B - fruit, yogurt, HEB (all bran)
l - roast veg pasta and cheese (2 x HEA)
Snack - stewed apple and yogurt (1 x HEB)
Supper - mushrooms, wild rice, asparagus, fruit salad

2 syns for honey in the apple. BAH I am NEVER normally this hungry after lunch!

I think I mean forestall Oh I am so tired. This could be in Russian for all I know

Thanks, Bloof. You've summed up very articulately a lot of what is going on in my head. I don't like babies or children as a general rule but when I think of our future, it seems very empty (that's not the right word but I can't think of a better one right now) with no real focal point...I don't really know how to put it into words.

I shall broach the subject while we are away and see what DP thinks

Talking 'bout it can't hurt, Fuck. I mean: you don't know what his feelings have been - he may have been thinking along the same lines as you, but been afraid to articulate them knowing your view on the matter! The OM married me on the assumption he'd never have children, so much did I loathe the whole idea. It was only years later I realised how much he'd wanted a family, and how much he must have loved me to give that up I fear I have IN NO WAY been a good and loving enough wife to compensate

I think 'one of those' chats is in order. We had a similar chat when I reached a hiatus in my career. I can safely say best thing I ever did. DH thinks the same. It's a life changing thing. And there a lots of cons to outweigh the pro's. For example my vajazzle will never be the same ago.
Bloof - you sound like you have a good un there.

Gym was OK, horrified at how unfit Ive become. Still, on the road to recovery now. Also had a Bridget Jones moment where I fell off the powerplate. Ha, lucky soft landing! Postnatally not allowed to do too much - Zumba and pilates classes, swimming and low impact gym work is what was advised!

Fuck - do some packing!