Is 30 too many for a hen do?

[mam1998]

this Is my own fault, I’m very number blind and created a hen group on Facebook and feel like I went overboard inviting people… I didn’t realize how many I actually wound up inviting 🙈

my sister kicked me from the group so it can be a surprise she’s organizing it the only guide I said it I just want a weekend city break abroad.

I feel really bad her having to plan for all these people now, even though she said it’s okay.

my anxiety is in overdrive and I’m just panicking that I have gone way over the top with invites? Has anyone else gone abroad with a big hen do group?

so far 20 is confirmed…

I think 30 is fine but I'd lean towards an all inclusive place I think so you don't have to worry about booking restaurants etc. Can still go out for drinks etc or the odd celebratory meal but most of it will be covered ... financially and logistically!

Christ they aren't all like that 😃

Also thoroughly unhelpful - but I agree with you entirely. A particular dislike of mine is where the ‘hens’ all dress in one colour and the bride in another. Thousands of pounds spent on outfits solely for a social media post. Wild!

It’s a lot but doable if it’s kept simple, costs are kept down and choices for eg restaurants are places with a set menu/buffet, book a hotel with breakfast included etc. Book an excursion/activity which includes drinks so one cost for all and so on. Tell your sister to avoid tat, any dress code should be very simple and decided months ahead and so on. Keeping fixed costs down is key for happy hens

30 abroad sounds like a recipe for disaster, unfortunately I have first hand experience as a guest. Due to large amount of people, we had to break up into smaller groups to go out and eat and do most activities. Barely spent any time with the bride to be, its not like 30 of you can get ready and pre game in one room!
Why do you need to go abroad?

Why do you care what other people do for their hens? You don’t have to go on them.

I know, I fully accept unreasonability on this. But it feels cathartic to release it onto the Internet.

Far too many!
just book a restaurant and go for a meal be done with it

Why? Why shouldn’t she go abroad and why is it far too many?

She doesn’t need to, she wants to.

30 hens on a flight poor other people
in a hotel
trying to keep everyone happy

insane

It’s a lot but people do it. Have fun!

My expectation would be:
30 are interested.
25 will be able to make the date agreed date
20 will be able to sort childcare, get time off work etc
15 will be able to afford it or actually want to go to the location.
10 will sort their lives out and pay and actually go.

You have a party locally for the 30 and then if you MUST have you surprise weekend abroad do it with a maximum of 5 plus you.

There will be 30 people on the flight and 30 people in the hotel regardless.

Yes but not all on one huge group it’s incredibly disruptive

I actually think 20/30 would be preferable for me because I struggle to feel on it all the time.

hear me out!

A group of 20/30. Told to book X resort for X dates.

With a large group you can dip I. And out of the organised fun as you please without people noticing your lack of presence.

Of you are tired by 11pm you can slink off to bed without the group noticeably getting smaller.

You can sit back and listen to conversation without feeling like you need to involve yourself and be “on” all the time.

I would suggest however your sister picks an easily accessible resort with lots of various accommodations.

@ Gerbills -
The OP asked whether 30 was too many for a hen do. It’s not a matter of whether or not I “care” what other people do - an opinion was sought, and I gave mine.

How on earth is it disruptive? It’s the same number of people.

People in large groups on flights are noisy! Have you never witnessed this????

we went on a flight once and half the hens were kicked off at the departure airport for being loud and last week there was a flight to Benedorm and it had a big stag do on it and it had to be diverted to France as there was disruptive passengers - it hit national news

30 is absolutely fine. If i was organising I'd book for myself and the bride and tell the rest of the group the dates, our hotel and flight details and let them all book their own. That way they have the option to book the same, or upgrade/downgrade according to budget. Arrange to meet through the day after breakfast and then again after your evening meal. This also allows people more control over their own budget and youre not trying to accommodate everyone's food preferences.
Hope you have an absolute blast whatever you end up doing.

If it hits national news that’s because it’s not common.

I have no issue with people enjoying themselves in a big on holiday.

I feel really very sorry for the person organizing this! But if you can get rooms in a big chain hotel sorted and they’re very organized with where you eat and entertainment this could be great!

That would be rubbish, she would only get to talk to a couple of them. On a weekend away Much more chance of actual qualify time with each attendee.

I would suggest to your sister to do Ireland, Galway if you can get there, it’s so fun!
Barcelona is also great for hens. People could book their own accom and you just have differnt activities they each sign up to.