Vegan wedding causing issues

[WeddingProblem]

We are getting married in a few months. Registry office then a meal in a restaurant for 40 guests. I’m vegan. My partner and kids are happy to eat vegan for our wedding (they’re a mix of vegan, vegetarian and meat eater) so we have booked a vegan restaurant.

A couple of relatives have told another relative that they’re not happy with the restaurant choice being vegan and might not come to our wedding because of it. The relative asked what the issue is, whether they had any allergies/intolerances, but no, it’s purely because they don’t want to eat a vegan meal.

We haven’t addressed it with them and I’m not sure how to. I’ll definitely wait for them to bring it up. I’m hoping they won’t, but if they do, how would you deal with it? My partner, relative that told me and friends all say to just say it’s a shame if you can’t come but we understand. One person thinks we should change restaurant 😬 but I don’t feel we should have to do that for our wedding and it’s just one meal.

What would you do? Of the people attending, roughly half are vegan or vegetarian and we’ve had lots of positive comments about the restaurant we’ve picked even from some of the meat eaters.

Stop trolling!

@lookluv

lol as if a vegan/vegetarian is gonna fuck off their principals, morals and ethics around meat eating in order to eat a chicken breast at a wedding! It’s not gonna happen and ridiculous of anyone to suggest it.
why are you so anti- vegans and vegetarians? Why can’t you have respect for them? Do you really not care at all about animal welfare?

We went to a vegan wedding and my adult DS could eat nothing because it was all sprinkled with seeds. The caters were told DS allergic to treenuts and seeds but only heard the nuts or thought nuts were the serious ones, everything had seeds in!

But it's all about beliefs and morals. One could argue veganism is more rooted in fact that religion.

(I'm typing this eating a bacon sandwich)

That’s nothing to do with it being a vegan wedding, it’s everything to do with the caterers not taking allergies seriously - could have happened at any wedding.

You think a VEGAN restaurant should frogo it's ethical principles and sell non vegan alcohol because no one would know?? Should thry also use eggs and cows milk in the recipes too cos no one will know?

So the caterers were terrible at their job. That's not because it's vegan. We hired a caterer to provide meaty, veggie and vegan dishes but with seafood and but allergies so she worked hard to cut the nuts without impacting the flavour. It's called doing your job properly. I'm sorry that didn't happen at your wedding

That's really poor on the part of the caterer.
When I got married, about a hundred years ago, we were catering for vegan, vegetarian, gluten-free, egg-free and kosher. The caterer we used, recommended by the venue co-ordinator was really good and made sure to triple-check with us about specific allergies.

Believe me I have my own issues with veganism but at the end of the day it’s your wedding and you can do what you like. I could not think of anything worse but if I wanted to share your day I’d put up and shut up. So I’d be telling them to let me know asap as you need to do the numbers.

@Labelledelune what are your issues with veganism?

Exactly. Veganism isn't a lifestyle choice. It's an ethical decision.

As for missing meat for one meal, it's like someone refusing to go to a wedding because they aren't serving chips!

I’ve owned restaurants in the past, that’s all I’m saying 😜

I've mostly only read your posts OP. I'm sorry you're getting so much heat! It's your wedding and those who want to celebrate with you should be able to see past their own preferences for one meal! Ridiculous.

I hope your wedding is everything you want it to be surrounded by those you hold dearest.

5ft5
Same BMI my entire adult life- pregnancies excluded.

I wouldn’t want to be attending OPs wedding.
HTH. “Hun”🙄

veganism is a lifestyle choice, likewise not eating pork if you are jewish, muslim etc is a lifestyle choice - if push cam to shove you could eat meat, dairy and not die unlike someone who is physically allergic to nuts.

I have no issues with vegans or vegetarians, know many and are friends with many. It is a choice not a necessity. Have seen far too many religious groups, vegans and vegetarians have a sneaky bacon butty to understand it is a choice not a necessity.

As i speak as someone with a very medically restricted diet who has NEVER expected anyone to cater for my medically issues .turns up eats the bits I can and avoids the stuff I can not and makes sure I have some food in the car to top up. On here we have heard about how ignorant meat eaters are, narrow minded, idots, reform voters and various other insults - they can compromise their ethical and moral beliefs to be an omnivore but vegans etc can not - double standard by any stretch fo the imagination. We have heard vegans/vegetarians moan about lack of "options" if there is only one veg offering - get over yourselves. Dont go to the wedding if you do not want to - the OP can do what she wants but can the insults on the omnivores and stop preaching your higher allegedly moral standards.
Epople can eat what they wan, when they want and how they want - expecting everyone to cater for each whim is unreasonable. Your dietary restriction your issue - I do put nut allergies in a separate category rather than intolerances which people confue with.

You've posted some tiresome shit on this thread, but this post is really offensive!

Your wedding your choice. These people are idiots. I’d be glad they didn’t come.

@lookluv , " likewise not eating pork if you are jewish, muslim etc is a lifestyle choice" shows you up as being ignorant.

I’m an omnivore who also enjoys veggie/vegan food (but not fake meat). My husband is a dyed in the wool, fully committed carnivore. If a friend or relative had their wedding breakfast in a vegan restaurant, he’d probably grouse a bit at me but he’d say nothing to the happy couple but thank you. He’d sit in the restaurant and eat the food that had been kindly provided. Don’t change your plans. Turn it around. Would you demand anyone change their wedding venue because it served meat? I don’t think you would. Celebrating with people you love is the focus of the day not the food. Congratulations and have a fabulous wedding.

@Paganpentacle

I just don’t believe you would forgo attending a wedding just because it would mean you eating one meal with no meat

Honestly? You would really not go to a wedding because the food was vegan? One meal out of your day, one day out of 365? My mind is well and truly blown.

Why? I'm honestly fascinated. I mean, vegan food is just vegetables, probably cooked pretty creatively as it's a restaurant.

I can’t eat all vegetables- lots of people can’t.
Its not a choice- unlike veganism.
I can control my intake when cooking for myself, or at a restaurant.
Not so much when the food is dictated for you.
I’d not make myself ill, no.

@Paganpentacle why would you be ill?

Ffs. It’s not the “no meat” it’s the “vegetables my intestines can’t cope with”.
At home I choose - at a wedding when it’s provided I can’t.

I have a FODMAP diet by necessity.
Eating certain common vegetables makes me ill.
It’s not a lifestyle choice. Unlike veganism.