Vegan wedding causing issues

[WeddingProblem]

We are getting married in a few months. Registry office then a meal in a restaurant for 40 guests. I’m vegan. My partner and kids are happy to eat vegan for our wedding (they’re a mix of vegan, vegetarian and meat eater) so we have booked a vegan restaurant.

A couple of relatives have told another relative that they’re not happy with the restaurant choice being vegan and might not come to our wedding because of it. The relative asked what the issue is, whether they had any allergies/intolerances, but no, it’s purely because they don’t want to eat a vegan meal.

We haven’t addressed it with them and I’m not sure how to. I’ll definitely wait for them to bring it up. I’m hoping they won’t, but if they do, how would you deal with it? My partner, relative that told me and friends all say to just say it’s a shame if you can’t come but we understand. One person thinks we should change restaurant 😬 but I don’t feel we should have to do that for our wedding and it’s just one meal.

What would you do? Of the people attending, roughly half are vegan or vegetarian and we’ve had lots of positive comments about the restaurant we’ve picked even from some of the meat eaters.

Thank you @SquirrelMadness I appreciate that.

Yawn

This "argument" that gets trotted out all the time is asinine and missing thr point entirely.

What is very clear on this thread is that a lot of people must eat very boring and plain diets completely lacking in imagination because they clearly have no idea what a tasty vegan meal could consist of.

They are utterly unable to think outside of the meat and two veg box.

Aren’t people rude and entitled?! They are complaining because they can’t have Baileys? For one meal? Do they have to have it thrice daily like some sort of alcoholic antibiotic they must not miss at any cost. Weirdos. And rude ones.

That's there choice, but I wouldn't change restaurant, if you are important to them they won't let it being vegan stop them attending your wedding.

I've never understood people like that. Surely everyone can enjoy a salad or some veg? I feel like meat or chicken or fish are more controversial in terms of taste. Everyone likes fresh salad or veg dishes.

Everyone likes fresh salad or veg dishes.

Apart from picky eaters.

Would you expect pork at a Jewish wedding or beef at a hindu wedding?

Honestly, I would not be excited at the thought of a vegan meal but it's your wedding, your day, your choice

But do you go to a wedding excited about what you are going to eat.
I cant remember what meals I've had over the years at weddings but I remember what great fun we've had celebrating.

True but I think it's one meal once and it's about the bridal party and celebrating their marriage and happiness - eat prior and just enjoy a drink instead.

They’re complaining about the drink as well, apparently - there’s no helping some people!

Unfortunately, I think there are quite a few people who hate salads and vegetables. (I am not one of them!)

This. ^

I can't believe some people still come out with this ludicrous 'argument.' 🙄

As I said, meat eaters can eat meat, and dairy... AND they can eat 'vegan food!'

Vegans cannot eat meat and dairy.

So asking a vegan 'would you eat meat at a carnivore's wedding as this is THEIR choice?' is a ludicrous and pointless question.

Of course no vegan is going to eat meat. Behave yourself FGS.

.

But vegans aren't a religious group......

Ethical veganism is a philosophical belief with similar protections in law to religious beliefs. Don’t see why religious dietary restrictions should be seen differently in that case,

I don’t see why it would be a problem for anyone, how ridiculous that some of the guests are upset about this. It’s not like you’re asking them to convert to vegan for the rest of their lives - it’s just one meal! If it was the other way round, ie meat only, I could understand. I once went to a wedding where the only food they served was a hog roast. There was a couple of side salads and some bread but no substantial alternatives to the meat, so all the vegans, vegetarians and people who don’t eat pork were very hungry that night. I think the couple must have just assumed that everyone loves a hog roast and didn’t really think it through.

I love meat, fish, game, seafood and don’t get me started on how much I love cheese.
But I like vegan food too .
I think anybody moaning about this needs to be told that if they don’t like it the6 don’t need to come -it’s an invite not a summons and that by coming it does not mean they are compelled to eat vegan for the rest of their sodding lives,
Some people are so damn entitled- I think I would have to withdraw the invite if anyone dared to complain to me frankly but that’s just me.

I hope you have a glorious wedding and a fabulous vegan feast.

The Op has said it’s only one couple.

I wouldn’t change restaurants. I would reassure them there would be enough French fries/snacks/ battered veg to see them through. Give them the option not to come too. It’s not a summons - your wedding, your way.

A wedding, is a joyous celebration of life and love. It always bemuses me that many people think that this needs to be celebrated by the taking of other lives. Hardly a celebration for the victims. Enjoy your wedding, enjoy the delicious vegan meal, and do not lose sleep over people too unimaginative to try a meatless meal.

Ridiculously rude and entitled. Ignore them.

There are, but those people tend not to object to chips and bread.

Well done for having a completely vegan wedding. I hope you stick to your guns and don’t change the restaurant because of two inflexible guests who may very well turn out to like the food after all.
The times as a vegan, I’ve gone to celebrations knowing full well that I won’t like any of the options, vegan or otherwise on the menu, but attended anyway because it’s about the occasion not the food, and eaten a full meal before hand.
it’s one meal for pity’s sake they’re not going to die for the lack of 🤦🏼‍♀️

As a vegan myself with one vegan son, one vegetarian son & an omnivore daughter & husband & mother-in-law. We all recently went to my favourite vegan restaurant & celebrated my husband & my 60th birthdays. As this restaurant is amazing, no one even considered or thought about eating any poor animals. Everyone enjoyed the fresh produce that was made special for me as I am also gluten free & low Fodmap & when a special dark rye bread freshly made for my requirements came out, we had to keep asking for more because everybody enjoyed it, along with their white crusty bread. So I would definitely have YOUR celebration in YOUR choice of establishment & if people do not eat, then that is their choice. Just as when we are invited to a BBQ, we do not go, we do not want to be around the smell of dead animals being cooked. That is so offensive to us, you on the other hand are offering fresh natural food grown from nature & if presented in a certain way, many do not even know what they are eating. Ask if there are any allergy or anaphylaxis issues & act on that if someone is allergic to mushrooms etc. Otherwise enjoy your day & this day is not about food, it is about the 2 being married & if the people that you have invited are more interested in a free feed, then tell them they can come to the wedding & go on their way afterwards. You are not forcing anyone to eat with you. If someone gives you a gift that is related to butchering animals or something horrible in that regard, send them a thank you note & let them know that your favourite charity enjoyed the donation of their gift. This is 2 peoples day & no-one else needs to be considered unless they have allergies, especially anaphylaxis.
have a beautiful wedding & may the day/night be enjoyed by the 2 of you & may you have luck & joy for the rest of your lives

It's a one off. If they cared about you, it wouldn't bother them. They probably vote reform.

I didn't know that about protections in the law. Is that in the UK? What protections are there?

https://www.vegansociety.com/get-involved/international-rights-network/what-rights-do-vegans-have#uk-law

In January 2020, an employment tribunal confirmed that veganism meets the criteria to qualify for protection under the Equality Act 2010.