Vegan wedding causing issues

[WeddingProblem]

We are getting married in a few months. Registry office then a meal in a restaurant for 40 guests. I’m vegan. My partner and kids are happy to eat vegan for our wedding (they’re a mix of vegan, vegetarian and meat eater) so we have booked a vegan restaurant.

A couple of relatives have told another relative that they’re not happy with the restaurant choice being vegan and might not come to our wedding because of it. The relative asked what the issue is, whether they had any allergies/intolerances, but no, it’s purely because they don’t want to eat a vegan meal.

We haven’t addressed it with them and I’m not sure how to. I’ll definitely wait for them to bring it up. I’m hoping they won’t, but if they do, how would you deal with it? My partner, relative that told me and friends all say to just say it’s a shame if you can’t come but we understand. One person thinks we should change restaurant 😬 but I don’t feel we should have to do that for our wedding and it’s just one meal.

What would you do? Of the people attending, roughly half are vegan or vegetarian and we’ve had lots of positive comments about the restaurant we’ve picked even from some of the meat eaters.

Since when have guests dictated a wedding? sod them, they have an invite if they wont come thats their problem.
I have been vegan for years and when i met my partner he was a meat eater but i told him straight away he doesnt need to change but over the years he has come to love my food and eats little else

I mean, I personally wouldn’t be keen on a vegan restaurant, I love meat and dairy products but for a wedding I’d just suck it up for one meal and not say anything.

The whole k "limited menu" just shows a lack of imagination. Grains, pulses, vegetables, fruits etc should make up a huge part of a balanced diet anyway. Food isn't inedible if it isn't a derivative of a living creature. And I'm a meat eater!

Sorry, I haven't read the whole of this long thread, but I'd simply say "we're paying for a hotel for you. If that's not enough generosity for you to eat a meatless meal, just let me know that you're not coming so that I can cancel the booking and invite someone in your place"

I read this as Vegas wedding causing issues....I'd survive for one day, im sure there's something they will eat.

Wedding meal - typically a 3 course. I can promise yo that if you can't whip up a vegan butternut squash soup or a mulligatawny soup that isn't delicious then that's on you, not the food. Coconut milk is superior to cows milk in most recipes. I've done vegan lasagne, casseroles, curries etc all gorgeous and clean plates even amongst the "grrrr where's my meat", folk. Vegan chocolate torte with raspberry coulis is a superior dessert to many things.

Assuming it just be bland because you couldn't cook it isn't a reasonable assumption of a specialist restaurant

Tough shit. If they don’t like it, they don’t come. Is seeing you get married and sharing in the day and celebrations or eating meat more important to them?

Herbs and spices make everything taste more interesting.
Plain boiled lentils are boring. A lentil dahl is delicious.

Or do you only eat plain food?

They’re being ridiculous , so what if there isn’t a meat main course .
I happily eat vegan , vegetarian, but also fish and some meat dishes .
We do tend to gravitate towards vegetarian.

I expect it’s not really about the lack of meat it’s more worry about what the meal will be.
For example I would struggle to eat a meal made predominantly with nuts or beans so would hope there would be lots of bread to fill up on if needed.
Our wedding reception was in an Indian restaurant but we had to have chicken and potatoes cooked separately for the older relatives who wouldn’t eat a curry.

It they can't go vegan for a few hours to celebrate your wedding then their loss.

Honestly, I blame these protesters we're all seeing on social media. The ones that judge people for eating animal products and stand outside farms or restaurants shouting at people. It's got everyone's backs up. Now people get really defensive and annoyed if someone mentions vegan now. It probably offended them in some way. 🤣 We had similar when a cousin had a alcohol free wedding. Some people were offended like they were telling others not to drink and didn't end up going.

Definitely don’t change restaurant, how self centred of them.
They will cope without eating meat for one meal.
as others have said, just reply with ‘That’s a shame, catch up soon’.

Presumably you are paying for this meal so it's up to you what you serve! People are free to go to mcDs after if they really want to!
If these people can't enjoy one meal to celebrate your marriage then do you really want them there?

I’m afraid I haven’t read all the messages, but just wanted to quickly say that I am vegan and really regret not doing a fully vegan menu when I got married years ago. My husband wasn’t vegan at that point (he is now) and it just didn’t occur to me, weirdly. I am now so sad that we actually paid to feed non-vegan food to our guests. We also missed an opportunity to show people how delicious vegan food can be. You are doing just the right thing. I hope the tensions blow over - I expect they will. Have a wonderful wedding day xx

Fuck me!
I went to a vegan wedding and it was lovely! Best chocolate cake I’ve eaten! Even if someone told me their wedding breakfast was a 3 course dish of plain rice, I’d think it was a bit strange but of course I would srill go and just bring some snacks with me and tell them it was a lovely day! To tell you they won’t come and to change the restaurant is bonkrsy

But is that really the case? The vegetarians are ok with eating vegan for one meal.

I don't understand why anyone should have a problem with that at all. Good food, surely they should feel happy that for one day they have had a cruelty free meal.

I’m not vegan or vegetarian, but I don’t eat meat at every single meal, and gasp I even chose to go to vegan or vege restaurants sometimes because the food is great.
Absolutely ridiculous that your relatives can’t cope with one meat free meal.

I can see both sides. A vegetarian or vegan usually has a few choices (or at least one!) in an ordinary restaurant but the meat eaters won't have the option of meat in yours. Having said that, I would probably enjoy the vegan meal and it is your wedding so you have the ultimate say.

If they are unhappy with the menu they are free not to come.

I would simply say “oh that’s a shame you cannot make it, catch up with you another time”.

No, why the hell should they? I would not go to a place serving meat for my wedding meal just because some of my family eat meat.

As long as Elvis turns up!

That is so, so silly. Meat eaters eat vegan food but vegans do not eat meat. Meat eaters have vastly more options almost everywhere.

It’s absolutely fine. I’m not vegan or veggie but would be delighted to be asked and happy with your choices. Have a great day.

👏🏻💯