How do I tell friend I cannot go away ?

[rolandratiloveyouroland]

we are in financial difficulty. I do not want to tell anyone that is the reason for not going away. We have a super holiday coming up over xmas, we paid for that in full over a year ago, before things got really bad. To not go on the upcoming holiday would mean losing the money as too late for any refund. So we will go (it's all inc so spending money should be very little). My friend will then say something along the lines of '' you can afford to go your super holiday but not one with me''.

What do I say to friend ? she will be more than pissed off at me.

Yes, friend, I can only afford to go on the holiday paid for before everything went up so much.

This

its really not that hard.

friend - fancy going away again this year?
you - I’m so sorry but I’m wiped out because of X! Y and Z… and have a holiday booked already and can’t justify anything else for a while…

if she gets huffy and pathetic about it then sorry but she isn’t your friend!!

Tell her a family member is paying for you to go .

You don't owe her an explanation. “Sorry it won’t work for me this year” is enough.

How is she a good friend when a) you can't/don't want tell her about your troubles and b) she wouldn't be understanding?
Hope you can work it out.

Having more than one holiday isn't in the budget as you've blown the budget on the Christmas one. Explain you're mortified.

I always blame work and say I can't take the time off.

You need to be firm and say we’ve got other commitments so I won’t be coming on holiday with you end of

it’s none of her business why! A true friend would understand this.

I really don’t see the problem here. Just tell her something along the lines of :

“We budgeted a set amount for holidays this year & we have spent all of that on this all inclusive trip, so unfortunately we simply don’t have the money for another holiday.”

Then explain that you haven’t planned for next year yet & will start to do that at some indeterminate point in the future.

What exactly are so you fearful of? Are you afraid of your friend? Do you not want to divulge that you are going through financial difficulty? It all seems very silly to me. Number one, if shes your friend, you should be able to be honest with her, and she should absolutely have sympathy for the situation - after all, we all encounter roadblocks and hard times, its hardly novel. And number two, while theres no need to divulge all the detail, theres also nothing to be ashamed of. I would strongly advise that if you tell her its not in the budget and she kicks off, that she is not much of a friend and you should probably remove yourself from her orbit, which sounds a bit unpleasant and unsupportive....

I’m sorry we paid for our booked holiday a long time ago but we are doing some financial restructuring and this means actually money is tightly controlled for the next 12 months but I still like and love you and want to spend time with you, but it has to be on a budget. Likewise we are cutting out small luxuries but it doesn’t mean you can’t come here for a cup of coffee and a nice walk and spend some time together

"You can afford to go your super holiday but not one with me"

Well yes obviously.

Family holidays trump a holiday with a mate.