What normal question do you hate being asked?

[timple]

Maybe not a normal question but to me it's anything to do with my first relationship. It's come up many times in different ways.

I was on a Hen do and we were playing games and it was 'whoever lost their virginity the latest has to take a shot'

It was me, I was 19 and it wasn't consensual. It was an abusive relationship. So I don't know whether to count that or the sleazy boyfriend I had right after aged 20.

It comes up very occasionally 'have you ever dated a scotsman?" Yes, my abuser but I can't say that so I just lied and said no.

"How old were you when you had your first relationship?" again the dreaded question.

I asked a lady who was telling me about her son the other day how many kids she had. She told me that just one as her other had died.

"What do you do for a living?"

I hate it when I'm introduced to a new person and they immediately ask if they can call me by the shortened version of my name

Admittedly the shortened version of my name is more common but my family and friends have always called me by my full name which I prefer

I hate being asked "why did you not have children?"
And
"What do you do for a living?"
I'm a cleaner and always feel "less than" when telling people.

I hate being asked what I did at the weekend. It’s like some sort of competition at work. I’m fairly introverted, so I like having a quiet weekend. I’m single, and work full time so I also need the weekend to catch up. Every one else is much busier, and I feel judged.

Have you lost weight?

Any question about parents or siblings as mine are dead.

are you going away? - no i am not ! haven’t afforded a holiday since kids (14 years)

Did you not want children? This is very triggering for me as I did want children but for a few reasons I can't have them. People just assume because I am 39 and married that just chose not to have kids. Then they are all sheepish and apologetic when i say i can't.

This. I am disabled (with a hidden disability and quite serious mental health issues ) and I hate this question because it makes me feel like shit because I am unable to work. I used to be able to say SAHM but my youngest is in highschool now so it doesn't really cut it anymore. I literally dread it and I know I go red when I answer.

Are you ok??

No im not, i left and reported an abuser, have been left in substantial debt and my MH health is in the gutter..... but yes I am ok.....

Same here. I don't have kids though so I can't say I am a SAHM.
Thankfully, most new people I meet are in the support groups I go to. Hardly anyone who attends has a job, so they get it. They rarely ask anyway.

How are you?

What sort of music do you like? I honestly don’t really like music, but if I give that answer people look at my like I’m very odd…

Where are you from?

Work colleagues asking what I'm having for dinner that night.
Boring as hell conversation

What do you teach?

I’m a community carer and feel the same, yet we work very hard !

I'm quite shocked that anyone asks PPs why they didn't have children. That's appalling. I have friends who have just one DC – in some cases I know why, and in others I do not. There is no way I would ever asked the ones where I do not why they have only one DC. I also had colleagues who had no DC – through choice AFAIK, but they used to get loads of pressure from family about it. MYOB tbh.

@timple I am sorry you are having to deal with these questions. I might be tempted to make up a first, more pleasant, bf, but then again, why should you have to?

I dislike the holiday question, as I don't really go on what a lot of people class as a summer holiday. It’s just not for me to fly to the Med and sit in the sun or sightsee. You crack on, I've no problem with others enjoying it.

I prefer to do something I will enjoy (this year it's a trip to watch the European Athletics Champs starting tomorrow) but for some reason for a lot of people bc it's a) in the UK (well, this year it is! I have been on similar “holidays” to mainland Europe too) and b) doesn't involve a pool or a sunbed, it’s not a holiday. Go figure.

“What’s for dinner?”

I’ve not been a carer but I’ve been a cleaner. It’s bloody hard work, and I wasn’t even doing it full time as it was a second job to boost income. If anyone judges you that’s their problem. Carers do an amazing job.

Yes, we do work hard, for very little. I'm 55 now and my body hurts at the end of the day but we have to keep going. Ps..community carers are worth their weight in gold 💗

Om sorry you wrnt through that OP.

I hate it when I'm introduced to a new person and they immediately ask if they can call me by the shortened version of my name
Admittedly the shortened version of my name is more common but my family and friends have always called me by my full name which I prefer
Only one person calls me a shortened version of my name and i dont mind her doing it. When im introduced to people and they say do you prefer (short version).I have no problem saying "no, actually everyone calls me........"

I dont recall anyone ever asking when I lost my virginity. I must say I'd be really put out if someone did.

I DO like music, but I can't answer this question. Or about a favourite anything, no favourite song, film, book, nothing...

"Do you miss your (dead) dad?" No is not the acceptable answer, apparently. I get horrified looks and have been called selfish before for my honesty. He was abusive. It's definitely a conversation stopper!

"Why are you single/Have you met someone yet?" I LIKE being single. Why isn't that enough? Why do I have to neatly partner off with someone, just because that is usually the world's version of normal?

Sometimes I am wary of being asked what my job is, as some people take offence to me being a farm worker, because it clearly means that I am evil and the cause of society's ills. Actually, I'm very fond of our cows, and they clearly are of me, judging by the way they rush up to me, mooing excitedly, (rather like when you go home after five minutes, and your pet dog is excited to see you, multiplied by 100!) when I go back into work after my weekend off!

"I dont recall anyone ever asking when I lost my virginity. I must say I'd be really put out if someone did."

It's the kind of thing young-ish people talk about. Very awkward when you have to say that you haven't lost it and they can't believe it!
I don't go to hen nights because they include these kinds of conversations between people who don't know each other well.