AIBU to feel gutted after seven weeks of silence from husband?

[Justplottinglaong]

Long story short.
Had argument with husband now silence and no communication for 7 weeks other than me questioning him ( via text) about female he liked/ ❤️ photo on Facebook.

He said it’s childhood friend’s sister who also was like a sister to him.
Not heard of her in 18 years.

Also, he deleted me off social media.

AIBU to be gutted, disappointed and disheartened?

My ex used to do this, to the point where I was so desperate for him to talk to me that i would apologise and beg him to even when it wasn't my fault. Thankfully when my son was 3 and I could see he was picking up on it I left. Im now married 16 years to an amazing man and often look back and wonder why on earth I put up with that piece of shit. Please please leave, if you cant do it for you do it for your children. It's hard and scary but you absolutely won't regret it. Life is short dont waste it on someone like this.

Is this the final straw for him?
Have issues like this come up before?
Do you argue regularly?
Has he been distant, secretive, had unusual behaviour, or changed routines inexplicably?

7 weeks silent treatment is beyond abusive what a prick and your poor 12 year old too. I can only advise you to call womens aid or whatever is close to you, this is disgusting behaviour.

My first husband used to do this, except it would be 3 weeks at a time. Then one year, 3 weeks silence was followed by a week of talking then another 3 weeks of silence….the final straw. In the beginning, I’d apologise , grovel, even though I didn’t know why or what I’d done…so it would be a week if I was humble enough. After a couple of years, I just ignored it, so it was 3 weeks . At a time. After the 7 weeks , I planned to leave. I stopped talking to him except when I had to out of necessity. No casual conversation. Not ignoring, just checked out. 4 months of that he sat me down and said ‘we can’t go on like this’ 🤣 I answered that the door he kept talking about..’if you don’t like it you know where the door is’ ..that I’d be going through that door when I could. He turned nice. A few months later, I’d gone. Exactly a year after the 7 weeks , into a rented flat, with my 4 yr old. Never looked back. Life became good after 20 yrs of him.

It’s abuse. Don’t put up with it.

You’re disappointed? I’d be fucking furious! How dare he treat you like that. I’d be off.

Please tell us that you're not cooking for him, doing his washing or not sharing a bed.

Grounds for divorce to be honest. He clearly dosent care the harm he's causing you. Leave him, you deserve better then that.

Clearly he’s been up to no good and is looking to blame you. What a c…

Time to ltb I’m afraid

One day of silence is pretty bad, but 7 weeks is just insane. Tbh if you can't take him liking a photo of another woman and this is his reaction I don't think this is a healthy relationship because either he has a history that gives you good reason to worry about him merely liking a photo or you have some serious incompatibility anyway.

I hope you're not doing anything for him and are making as much noise as you and your dc like downstairs, ignoring him as much as you can, why doesn't he just move out if he's so unhappy.

If that were my DH, his bags would be packed end of week 1 and divorce papers served end of week 2. The silent treatment is abuse, 7 weeks of silent treatment is utter insanity!!

Did we not have the thread about this husband a few years ago , liking a sisters old friends Instagram.

Absolutely this! He won't change. Please don't waste another minute with this abusive POS. You deserve so much more.

LTB

Friends husband didn’t speak to her for 8 months after an argument on NYE. She found her strength and left.

This behaviour from him is breathtakingly cruel. Tell him it's abusive. Give him a deadline and then put consequences in place if he doesn't shape up, snap out it and apologise for what he's done.

He needs to know he's destroying your marriage.

Does he have form for this, OP?

I have been through periods of hating each other, it’s a 20 year relationship and I do think you get ups and downs. We had a year split once, we didn’t see anyone else in that period but tbh it was none of our business if the other one did during that period. We ended up deciding that we did want to be together. We had got to a completely stalemate. Blamed the other for everything wrong and both of us refused to see eye to eye.
maybe you need a break from each other to see if you are happier alone or not. You could suggest a break, request that you don’t see other people and test if you miss each other or not.
i lived in that situation of completely locking each other out and it’s horrible. Someone has to take the initiative and sometimes a break so you can think about if you really do want to continue is the only way forward. I would suggest a break.

This is actually shocking

can you tell him that if wants to lead separate lives he has to move out . Or get a solicitor to write to him if he refuses I communicate?

Pretty sure you posted about this a few weeks ago and were given loads of advice then?!

other than me questioning him ( via text) about female he liked/ ❤️ photo on Facebook

You haven’t spoken in weeks and this is what you messaged him about? Seriously?!

What was the original argument about? And has he ever done this before?

My ex didn’t speak to me for 6wks once. No way I was continuing a relationship like this. It’s abusive.

Stop staying upstairs for a start. Use your home.

Ideally while you begin the process of divorcing him.

This is a form of abuse. You know you need to leave.

What he is doing is abusive and you should consider all your options with a vew to separating.

So you have stopped all “wife duties yeah? - joint meals, laundry