My Dad married a woman twenty years younger, he will likely die before her. Does that mean I am unlikely to inherit?

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I think it does doesn’t it?

I’d use this as the opener to the conversation. Say you’ve been getting your finances in order ( or writing your own will.. etc ) and you’re trying to remember what the paperwork for him was. Can he remind you of his arrangements ( where his will is stored for example ). My DH and I have a will which includes a trust for our DD which other posters have outlined. This was set up at the time we signed our powers of attorney etc and did mean our will was more complicated and expensive to set up but neither of us wanted to be in a position of our DD inheriting nothing. I don’t actually think most people set their wills up like that. I think there’s just an assumption that the new partner will do the right thing ( which is clearly not necessarily the case )

If he hasn't made a will since he married, he doesn't have a will- marriage voids any previous will.

I found that my parents opened up a bit about things like wills and LPAs when I spoke to them about what I was doing (as I've recently gone through all this and made a new will and LPAs)- it's a lower pressure way of bringing the subject up.

Power of attorney doesn't have anything to do with leaving anything in the will though. You could be involved in all the stress and decisions when someone loses capacity and the new spouse can inherit everything.

You never know, they may both be doing the right thing by you with their wills.

My GF remarried very quickly when GM died back in the 1980s (though she was not 20 years younger). DM never had a good relationship with him and they both proceeded to ignore us for years, refusing all invitations and excluding us from family events. When he died nothing came to DM as expected and we all assumed he had left the lot to the new wife and she would leave the lot to her own kids.

However, on the new wife’s death recently, DM had a letter from a solicitor administering her estate telling her that the estate was being split equally between her, her DB and her two DC. So in the end at least one of them did the decent thing. We don’t know if this was due to an informal agreement between the two of them, or just the wife being decent, but it has somewhat restored my faith in human nature.

Yes - unless his will mentions you. And previous wills are null and void if not updated after a new marriage.

This happened to a friend of DH’s. A relatively wealthy man, his wife died when their kids were teens, eventually married someone not that much older than the kids and never made a new will so when he died suddenly in his 60’s the wife inherited everything and didn’t she share a penny.
But he was a successful business man who would have been aware of how the legal stuff works, his kids are pretty bitter about it. Their family home no longer anything to do with them, and will likely be left to the new wife’s family. All that upset for not spending a bit of money with a solicitor!

Sorry people are being mean, it’s a reasonable question to ask

You could ask him!

Many families I know who remarry have left their estate to their children but have allowed their wife to stay in the family home for life.

The 20 year age gap isn't that relevant as women tend to live longer anyway.

It's more about 2nd marriages when couples have children from their first marriage.

Tbh given men tend to die earlier than women, the age gap is immaterial. Even at the same age she'll likely outlive him, and end up with the caring responsibilities.

Having been through this exact situation, the answer to your question is 'yes'.

I think @Bananadramatic nails it with this: Always best to plan as if you won't inherit anything. You never know what will happen.

New wives, care home fees, donkey sanctuaries, a falling-out leading to a new Will ... whatever.

I agree OP.

It is a perfectly reasonable thing to wonder about - and even to feel hurt about if he does plan not acknowledging you in his estate.

POA is nothing to do with leaving assets. Its about making decisions if someone can't. That includes finances- it's nothing to do with inheritance.
I hope you know what you signed if you do have POA.

I would be wondering too!

You aren't entitled, blah blah, but it's fairly standard to inherit from one's parents (if there's anything left) so the thought will pop into people's heads.

One would hope that the remarrying parent would give some thought to what is fair for the kids of first marriage but in my experience they often don't and assume the new spouse will "do the right thing" when the time comes. This is especially true for men.

Your dad might have made provisions in his will for you or maybe not. If he does without a will his wife will get the first 375k (i think) of his estate, kids and wife get a split of anything left. But if their house is in joint names (joint tenants) she gets that automatically without it being included in the 375k.

If she outlives him she might leave her estate to you as she has no kids but no obligation to (and you'd probably have to wait an extra 20 years or so).

I note that she gave up working when she was 40. Was that when they married? If she has no income she may well need to spend whatever your dad leaves her so there might not be much left by the time she passes if she has a good long life, even if she does leave her estate to you.

My friends mum passed away last year and her will tied everything up nicely. She had been widowed and remarried but the house had been paid off by her and her first husband (father of kids). House stayed in her name and second husband got a life interest to live there but the legal title passed to the kids. Very sensible and well thought out. Second husband had his own kids and has provided an inheritance fund for them from the savings he made not having to pay a mortgage etc. She had been upfront about her will so everyone knew where they stood and could plan accordingly. I wish more people would!

If there’s nothing wrong with asking the question, why not ask him?

A family friend remarried in his 50s to another family friend the same age (both widowed.)

The agreement they had was that she could stay in the home they livedi n but when she died it would be sold and go to his sons. (It was his home, not hers.)
She got his pension when he died.

She died about 10 years after him and yes, the house was sold and his adult sons inherited.

Having been in a similar situation it is reasonable to ask.
Strife can arise when assumptions are made and then arguments start.
I would tell him you are putting your own affairs in order eg making a will.
I would ask him directly and tell him you will support whatever decision he makes.
People in second marriages often don’t want a discussion because they don’t want ill feeling but it’s better to be straight.
In my experience it was not discussed and caused family rifts.
And getting POAs sorted if vital. Everyone laughs at what I call my ‘death book’
eg will, letter of wishes, POA funeral plans.
Having looked after parents with no POA was a nightmare but they had a will which made probate easier.
I would also want to say - dad I just want to assure you if anything happens to you I will be here to support your wife. That will mean a lot to him.

If you die without a will I think actually it's only below a certain amount that automatically goes to spouse, then over that amount split between spouse and kids. Altho kids might not contest (we didn't,). I think OP is right to ask. I've set it up so we each own 50% share of house and if either of us dies will go direct to kids with spouse having right to remain. Also protects half house for care home fees if only one party needs. This idea that kids shouldn't be interested is ridiculous nowadays where unfortunately inheritance is playing a much larger role (compared to their own work ethic for example) in the life chances of younger generations. Whilst you should never rely on it, the friends I've seen who were given a helping hand by previous generation have significantly better lifestyles and life chances for their own children are massively improved - it has a multiplier effect.

A POA is in no way connected to a will.
My parents have POA and a Will, as do I and my DH.

POA seems on this thread to be being conflated with finance/ inheritance.
It's used access accounts etc if someone can't due to illness.

Sorry if that is not what you meant.

There is no splitting of assets going to the spouse automatically.
What you have described is a tenancy on common whereby children inherit/ own one parent's share, to avoid sale of the house for care home fees.

It is quite literally ‘her business’ whether she inherits money. Shes not asking about whether someone else will inherit, she’s asking about something that will directly affect her. It’s her business.

OP you are completely reasonable to wonder about this. Presumably half of your dad’s assets are from your late mum. And sorry for your loss of your mum. Your dad’s estate is not just his (morally) to do with what he wants or leave to the donkey sanctuary even if the law allows that, because your mum’s estate is mixed in with his now.

I’ve never heard it said in real life but it is strange how some people on here will say that children are owed nothing by their parents’ wills. Why do they never say that younger step parents who marry an older spouse should be owed nothing in the will from that short marriage to an older spouse? Surely the stepparents come with their own adult assets and don’t need that inheritance including from deceased previous spouses? Why do they need to marry at all, when the law is so all or nothing about the inheritance situation, if they do..?

Flipping heck. You are really going for Op aren’t you?
My kids know they will inherit our estate when we die. One of my daughters is the executor. It’s best to be open and save any upsets down the line.
Why wouldn’t you want your kids to inherit?

Yes, but it is all part of planning for the future and can be a good opening for a tricky conversation, so "Dad, remember we did the powers of attorney, are you planning to update those to include DWife? What about wills?"

Inheritance doesnt exist until the person dies. Until that point it's all theirs and nobody else's business.

It’s a perfectly reasonable thing to ask/wonder about. When I inherited from my parents what I got represented their life story, the choices they had made. The final sum was something tangible I had from them and what I have done with it has always been carefully considered.