Any advice for someone who doesn't know one end of horse from another. How expensive is this likely to be?

[Spero]

Grateful for any advice, just starting on my research here for next year.

I am not remotely interested in horses, but my daughter is. Her only dream is to have a pony. We live within half a mile of a riding centre/stables so I was wondering if it is feasible to think about getting her a pony which could live at the riding centre and she goes round a few times a week to do whatever it is you do with these animals.

Once she is in secondary school in 2016 I expect to free up about £500 per monthin child care costs.

So if I can take the hit on buying a pony (I assume a few thousand or depends on what you want?) I assume if there is space, he or she could live at the riding centre if I pay for it.

do you think £500 a month is feasible for livery, saddles, whatever else? Tack seems eye wateringly expensive from the little I know.

i have heard of people sharing or loaning out a pony - would this be a good idea in case the reality of a pony doesn't quite meet my daughter's dream? I think she is quite realistic has she has been having lessons for two years and been on pony camps etc so she knows the score.

OP - I am not being unpleasant, I am just stating facts.

I run a livery yard and don't allow any unaccompanied under-18's. You might find yourself relied on to be at the stables more often and for longer than you would like. You might actually find that you enjoy it, if you allow yourself to.

I would suggest buying something like the BHS First Pony Manual and the BHS Horse and Stable Management books. I'm not big on everything BHS, but these will be a good guide and provide some pretty sound advice. As the adult, you will ultimately be responsible for the pony, so make sure that you are well clued up. :)

I never understand why people come on here looking for advise and get shirty when they don't like what they hear?!

From what i've read it sounds like you'd be more suited to a share, not lease because 10 is FAR too young to do it alone, and you are inexperienced.
Then it's 3 days a week or whatever the arrangement is, and if it doesn't work out you move on, you aren't stuck with a unridable horse that you can't sell.

"From what i've read it sounds like you'd be more suited to a share, not lease because 10 is FAR too young to do it alone, and you are inexperienced. "

Spero said, very clearly, upthread that in light of what had been said on here she'd revised things upwards from 10/11 to when her daughter is more like 12/14. She has also said she'll consider a share. I don't think she's getting shirty about the advice - much of which does seem to be rather "horsier than thou" - so much as people not reading the whole thread and realising that she has taken on board the advice and changed her mind because of it.

AuntieDee you ARE being rather patronising and unpleasant though. Just so you know.

Spero, the poster who has posted most sense so far is ThatBastard ( ) who has said that depending on the horse or pony and the way you keep it, it is possible to put as much or as little effort and money in as you wish to. The problem being that for the average horse owner it takes many years to figure out how to do either end of the spectrum to best advantage.

My own take on the matter is that it is possible to do horses even as a beginner the Hard Work way or the Lots of Money way. I would reckon that as you work and do not wish to be essential to the pony's care then the lots of money route will be the route for you. Rather than asking here, where - as you have found- you will gets lots of replies to the tune of "I have horses myself but they are not for the likes of you" and "if you factor in everything a pony could cost you more per month than your house" I would recommend speaking with a few of your local yards about prices, as costs do vary across the country, even within the local area prices can be quite different between yards. I would also try to talk to your daughters instructors and try and cultivate some friends among the local horsey parents. They will be able to give you tips and ideas about how they manage their kids ponies.

In the meantime there are many options. My just-turned-11 helper is one of my most valued horsey helpers. She sits on my younger kids ponies and keeps them fit. She's introduced one pony to hunting already and this year will take the new one out with me before I put my 7 year old daughter on him out hunting. She goes to shows and PC rallies on them, rides when she wants, and I expect her to do her share of stable duties. She is fab. It doesn't cost her parents a penny, I get a helper, and I am able to supervise her so she does things correctly. When she briefly decided she wanted to ride bigger horses she went back to her old riding school where it was concluded all the things she did at mine meant she was beyond the riding level of most of the children there, even the older kids. She was put in with the 16-18 year olds due to her ability, but didn't fit in with them age-wise, and was back at mine a month later!

Ask around enough, and you will find there are quite a lot of people who will be interested in a competent and keen small jockey.

I agree with others that investing some time in making contacts on her current yard could be a great way forward. Especially the instructor/owner of the riding school (I'm assuming it's a good one, not all are but I expect you are aware of that and no fool). They should be able to advise in lots of depth about you and your daughter's situation and ability etc and in how much support they can offer too. They may also offer to look at ponies with you if you do go down that route.

When I was growing up I was fortunate in a lot of ways (we had no money) to able to share for free my instructor's horse, as her workload increased dramatically when she took over management of the riding school. I didn't have to pay anything (except competition costs) and could ride 2-3 times per week. I did "help out" a lot in the riding school in return, which arguably sometimes a lot crossed the boundary of a fair agreement/exchange, so watch out for that one, particularly in more "old school" yards. My parents weren't able to get involved much, and in all honesty this did leave me open to being taken advantage of at times.

That said, if it is a good yard with high standards (do they have high staff turnover etc) considering a working livery might be good, as would loaning one of their ponies, as they will be as invested as you are. In fact I would lean towards this for starters, but make sure any agreement you have is very clear.

Spero, the poster who has posted most sense so far is ThatBastard

Ahem......get it right!

All right, YouBastard, if that makes you happier...

I honestly would not consider working livery unless you want beginners bouncing around on your pony's back and pulling at its mouth.
If our pony was on working livery it would take her about two months to turn difficult and vicious , in my opinion.
source: horse owner and ex professional groom/instructor

I honestly would not consider working livery unless you want beginners bouncing around on your pony's back and pulling at its mouth.
If our pony was on working livery it would take her about two months to turn difficult and vicious , in my opinion.

Fuck me, what kind of riding schools do you frequent!?

Working livery can be an excellent solution for a child's pony to get the work and care it needs.
Having novices ride it under instructor's supervision will not ruin it.

"Fuck me, what kind of riding schools do you frequent!?

I have worked in several actually youbastard - inc BHS training and exam centres.

and yes I have seen several perfectly nice horses and ponies 'ruined' by working livery, it was sad to see.

Well they can't have been up to much if they were using the ponies so much and in such a way as to ruin them and make them 'vicious.'

OK youbastard, dismiss my years of experience and qualifications and opinion.
I know what I have seen, and yes they were well regarded exam and training centres.

Almost frightened to post....but here goes....Spero I was in a very similar position to you about three years ago. I knew bugger all about horses and that was just fine by me. My ds on the other hand absolutely loved them.
Slightly different in that he is older, but he is autistic with some learning difficulties.
When he was younger he went regularly to an RDA centre and became a competent rider quite quickly, we found a riding school much closer to home and he started going for lessons there a couple of times a week. They did own a pony days and camps in the holidays, he joined Pony Club, and competed in several small comps at the riding school. While all this was going on, I gave him lifts there and back, paid for lessons, bought hoodys and jodhpurs, and boots, and thermals, and hats...and stood about at comps chatting to other parents and clapping when everyone else did.
Then he wanted his own pony - a particular pony at the riding school, the one he always "got" when he was having his lessons and attending camps, and the people who owned him were selling as their daughter had outgrown him.
So I spoke to the stables owners, who were well aware of my reluctance to be involved, and I bought the pony.
Ds was thrilled, and nearly three years later, is still thrilled. I have taken the "lots of money" route as mentioned by pp, and it works great for us.
Ds goes up three or four times a week, a couple of evenings and most of the day at weekends, mucks out when he's there, does grooming, fills hay nets and rides if there's someone there to supervise - which there is 99% of the time, he happily accepts that he can't if no one is free.
We had his pony as working livery which was great, and I was able to negotiate terms that meant ds would have his pony to himself every evening after 6pm, and always on a Sunday. We also had Mondays as the school wasn't open to the public that day.
They changed last year and closed the riding school, so it is now just a livery yard, and pony is on full livery - he is enjoying his retirement and is getting older, so is delighted to be ridden less, but is as calm and bombproof as he always was.
I have made lots of good friends among the "horsey people" at the yard, my lack of enthusiasm for any of it is a source of hilarity for them, but they accept it as one of my little foibles and are great at helping out ds if he needs a bit of advice.
Ds has also made friends among the teenagers who are always there, and that alone is worth the money as far as I'm concerned. He has been completely accepted by them because of their shared interest, and his differences don't matter when he's at the yard.

Dumpy that's lovely. I do get where some posters are coming from in warning the OP about the potential dangers of horse riding but I think it is important to remember how great it is to be around such amazing animals.

Duncan I took my stage 3 riding at a riding school that was full of rather sour horses who were at best switched off. I didn't pass. I'm not quite sure how, at stage 3 level, you're supposed to undo years of what is basically abuse within about 10 minutes. I certainly couldn't manage it. I never retook the exam. You wouldn't get me to do it now as the only horse I'll jump is my own. My flatwork however is now somewhere between stage 3 and stage 4 level.

I think it's a case of picking the right school and also, rather than buying a privately owned pony and expecting it to fit into a school, going to the school and looking for a pony there. As Dumpy describes above, this can work well. You'll get a pony that's able to cope with a riding school and you'll know the school protects its ponies enough that they don't get completely sour.

thank you Gabilan, you know my point was valid then!

My blood pressure couldn't take much more yesterday! I am glad to see however that the majority of posters understand that you will get more flies with honey than vinegar and have taken the time to read what I post, rather than continually 'advising' me about a mythical situation i.e. that I wish to strap my 10 year old to a vicious stallion come rain come shine and leave them cantering unsupervised around a muddy field.

Anyway. Thank you Dumpy, that scenario sounds ideal and almost exactly what my daughter described as her dream scenario. Her school has a very well known equestrian centre and she will be there for one more year; she has also had lessons at what appears (in my ignorant, uneducated way) to be a well run and well staffed riding school, so I think my next step will be to get some clear advice from people there are the best thing for her over the next few years.

good to know that non horsey people don't necessarily get driven out by pitchforks; I am nearly 45 and I know what I like. I am not suddenly going to have an epiphany and find myself striding round in jodhpurs and shovelling poo or whatever else is involved. I will come along to events and clap politely but that is about it.

And thanks Gabilan and Bastard, some good advice. Backinthebox that is also interesting about your young helper. the problem is I am just not sure how 'good' my daughter is but her parents evening is coming up and she is very keen I speak to her riding teacher, so maybe I can start the ball rolling then with an honest appraisal of what she could cope with and how it would change over next few years, obviously if she keeps up with her riding.

That sounds like a good place to start Spero. Working liveries can be contentious, particularly those run with just pound signs infront of their eyes, and will want to make as much money from your loan/working livery pony (have worked on lots of yards). Best thing to do is to ask around the yard, talk to other loaners/wls. Better still try to find someone knowledgeable to take your dd under their wing, an independent maybe, who can advocate on hers and the pony's behalf, particularly as it sounds like you might not always be able to. Good luck

Duncan I think it depends on the school, the pony, and what you want to do with the pony. With the best will in the world, riding schools teach beginners and some horses and ponies will have to put up with unbalanced riders. Of course schools can mitigate this but it does take a certain type of animal to put up with it.

If you get to the stage where you want to get your pony to HOYS you won't want anyone else on it. But if you want to learn the basics, do friendly competitions and have fun hacks, IMO a working livery arrangement can work well.

Very true Gabilan, and is probably the case for many starter ponies but I have also known working liveries who are only used for more experienced riders and working pupils, and this can work well too, depending on the yard.

OK youbastard, dismiss my years of experience and qualifications and opinion.

No probs, can do.

Speaking as a highly qualified instructor and well known competition rider (if we're going down that route ) working livery sounds like a good option for the OP.

Yes, you can get bad places, but - and here's the trade secret - dont use those places

But ssssshhhhhh! Don't let the unhorsies into my blinding bit of insider knowledge there.

And don't fall in the trap of thinking bhs / council approved always equals quality, or conversely that a yard without bhs (legally must be council approved, I think) is rubbish. Go by reputation and recommendation as far as possible.

If it's the school I'm thinking of then I'd wait until she is at her new school and see if she wants a pony still. The culture at that school is such that you almost have to want a pony or have one to fit in. If she is going to a state secondary, she may change her mind.