The Forty - Eight Republic - countdown for DfE media agency to wake up

[StaffRepFeistyClub]

You are most welcome to this school staff support thread to get us through stressful times. It is meant for school staff only – a sort of room of requirement. Baiters, haters, goaders, and bashers can jog on somewhere else.

If you are NOT staff and just have a general education query please start your own thread.

You can play here if you are a member of one the following groups-

-ABBA - anti bashers and baiting association
-SWAB - school workers against bashers
-SWOT - school workers opposing teacherbashers
-STARS - schoolworkers together against ranting + slurs

Do not give the staffroom password just in case it attracts the wrong sort

Other requirements for staff room entry include the ability to find the staff room, the ability to find a clean mug in the staff room, knowledge of the photocopier codes, and the ability to sniff out where the booze is stashed - Thirsty Tuesdays, Fizz Fridays now in operation.

If you come with a stick to goad us then that is not allowed in the staffroom and you will receive a detention

@JanFebAnyMonth

Now noble, as we've previously established, I do have standards....

Bah.

Surely as an ancient cock it's of purely academic interest.

If you do go, please take a ruler and report back.

Ha! Yes definitely up for a pity party. Or even a penis relic party

I've got a cgp workbook for DD and I'm going to do the white rose honelearning stuff. It's mainly fractions, geometry, measurements and translations. Most of which I can do with food or Lego analogies

I have to say though Ophelia that compares to you I really have nothing to feel sorry about

We watched 'Greenland' tonight. Not so much a disaster film as a will-they-get-to-the-plane-altogether-in-time-but-of-course-they-will film.

Watched that too! Oh my goodness the horror or Gerard Butler’s changing accent!

Sorry @EnemyOfEducationNo1 it’s all just too much isn’t it. Yes, do enjoy that wine!

Here for hand holding tomorrow @OpheliasCrayon if needed!

Kevin Bacon and Fred Ward are finally appreciating that no foundations, building houses out of wood and having single story buildings is bad news for wormy bity things!

@EnemyOfEducationNo1

I have to say though Ophelia that compares to you I really have nothing to feel sorry about

Ooo no @Ememy I don't work like that .. there's no comparing who needs to feel sorry for what ... If you're having a rough time you're having a rough time doesn't matter if I am or not ..you're allowed to feel how you do

And you're allowed to feel an ancient stone cock should you find it @JanFebAnyMonth

I've been to cambodia a few times and they have a thing about ancient stone penii as well. They call them 'Linga/ lingam" and they have entire rivers with stepping stones of stone penii. It's fascinating. .and also very fucking slippery if you try to walk over them.

Well who doesnt love an ancient stone cock?

Googling ‘ancient stone cocks’ brings up this beauty first. I particularly appreciate the caption from the newspaper

Truly a thing of awe and wonder

They are rather glorious. Prior to the river penis discovery (we'd seen about it in lonely planet so had gone specifically to find them, obviously, who wouldn't ).... We had been at the temples at Angkor. I have all the usual photos and me sitting on what I thought was a pillar. All posey and perched sidewards, smiling coquettishly at my then new bf (now DH)
Only when we got back and looked through the photos did I realise that also was .. an ancient stone dick.

Watched that too! Oh my goodness the horror of Gerard Butler’s changing accent!

Yes! At first I thought he was trying to go for an American accent, then they talked about kilts so I realised he wasn't. Then I was confused...

I need to watch Tremors now! Is it on Netflix or Prime? Or do I have to gasp rent it?!

entire rivers with stepping stones of stone penii.

Sounds like the sort of thing Boy George would have as a water feature.

It's weird, isn't it, how universal and timeless the nob is?

Whenever I go into a room and the projector slide is pulled down, there's a brief frisson of 'will there be a penis on the board?' when I pull it up. If Y10, chances are reasonable.

Knew I should have checked this thread before I went to bed. Now I’m googling ancient stone cock instead of going to sleep.

@RafaIsTheKingOfClay

I’m not going to be explaining exactly why I haven’t had much sleep if I’m tired tomorrow.

I need to watch Tremors now! Is it on Netflix or Prime? Or do I have to gasp rent it?!

Currently on ITV4! (Channel 25 on Freeview)

Whenever I go into a room and the projector slide is pulled down, there's a brief frisson of 'will there be a penis on the board?' when I pull it up. If Y10, chances are reasonable.

This is always my risk too, when I have to teach Penetration Testing to Year 10s. Often interesting what I find drawn on desks

Bloody exam boards and their syllabi.

Moving swiftly in - here's a very good point from Counterfire, which is apparently a revolutionary socialist organisation - from their article on why schools shouldn't reopen on 8 March:

This is not just about the safety of schools, but of the surrounding communities. Schools are often the most densely populated buildings in the community. The more the virus spreads inside a setting, the more it will be able to spread outside it, via public transport and family members.

Nob drawings are my main reason why I don't use mini whiteboards....
However. I have been known to make comments on anatomy and get them to label them properly if they do draw them

Sorry Jan maybe you can cover your eyes?

Before Christmas (Y10 obvs) there was a large penis on the whiteboard. I rubbed it vigorously with a board cloth. Didn't budge - permanent marker!

That's fine, I thought. I know the trick of getting permanent marker off the board - you just scribble over it in normal board marker and then wipe it off.

It was quite large. And needed a lot of scribbling. So there I am, scribbling diligently over a the outline of a penis, essentially making a larger, blurrier penis, in front of Y10 who were waiting for their starter and wondering what on earth I was doing.

Got rid of it though!

HCP demanding better masks:

But we have open windows 🤷‍♀️ (Except one room I teach in doesn’t even have a window)

Early morning wind up. Wider MN will not like the suggestion of fines since the convenient answer is often 'let silly people keep children off and don't fine them'. Doesn't learning time always fall in the summer term?

www.theguardian.com/education/2021/feb/19/learning-time-for-children-declined-as-2020-covid-lockdown-progressed-study

I had a large new cupboard delivered last term by the old caretaker and the apprentice (who is about 50)
Where do you want it, miss?
In front of the large spurting cock, please.
Bloody hell, miss. That's a big one.

I hate other people using my room!!

Snurk.:o

@MrsHamlet you must try! This has been going on for days - call your GP and ask for an emergency appointment - you've put up with it for a good while now and getting nowhere with OTC things - irs the weekend as well, I do hope you get one!!