What is the worst "bad Teacher" thing you have ever done

[Nehru]

was laughing remembering when as anew teacher I put
"william had a big_" as a fill in the gaps sentence for a very weak group on the board.

as i wrote it out I was reading it, and i started helpless gufffawing. It was so bad i was weeping and couldnt turn around...

WHat have you done?

On my first day as an NQT I knocked a little girl's head with the milk crate. I was mortified and was terrified she wkd go and tell her policeman father I hurt her. Luckily her parents were fine about it!

Spent 2 hours projectile vomiting in the nurses room with injured kids coming in and out asking if I was OK. Was genuinely Ill though not hungover, got taken to A&E.

My mentor when I was training once fell asleep after a heavy night out on his lab desk during a lesson. His Year 9 class just tidied up and left quietly. We only found out when his next class came along.

Coolas Brilliant!

Drew a massive willy on the whiteboard.

It was MEANT to be a pulley system, with circular weights.

But it just looked like a giant cock.

Year 12, all boys. Gosh that was a fun lesson.

BellaBearisWideAwake Haha!

That reminds me, I drew a penis on the board intentionally - with Year 11 we were studying Tennyson´s poem Mariana which talks of the eponymous heroine in bed at night with the moon casting the shadow of a poplar tree over her face, implying that she is dreaming of sex and penetration / penis. As the internet connection in my classroom is useless I couldn´t get an image of a poplar tree for them to look at and see the shape so with my extremely limited artistic skill I "drew" one, with stick figure Mariana, a bed and a moon.

Needless to say they "got" the poem after that and the lesson stuck in their minds leading to some interesting essays - they were set 4 of 6 and ended up with 12 A*, 7A and 1B, I was delighted with them. Maybe I should draw penises on the board more often.

Took class of 10 year olds swimming in the public swimming pool; hurrying them up in the changing rooms so banged on locked door of cubicle and ordered its occupant to come out IMMEDIATELY; was mortified when an extremely elegant lady emerged, outraged.
"No-one has ever spoken to me like that before" she said in front of my deeply appreciative class, and stormed off to complain.

Two years ago I had a tough class and they were being particularly foul one morning. To make matters I couldn't use my whiteboard for my lesson as the new young, Polish tech guy was fiddling about updating my computer.

Half way through the lesson I was not in a good mood and then to make it worse a phone text alert went off.

"And WHOSE phone was that?" I snarled.

Well, the young Polish tech guy looked positively terrified as he put up his hand...

The kids were pissing themselves and I couldn't keep a straight face so it really broke the atmosphere.

attempted to walk out of classroom with important visitor... I got flung backwards as my cardigan had hooked onto the door handle! mortified I was !! Then the door bounced back and hit me!!