Unofficial Draft Guide to RFF

[MrsStarkey]

Was I the only one that felt a little badly for the MN team member who tried to get our input in order to help build a guide for this forum recently? That didn’t go as planned!

Am in the only one who laughed about Justine’s “The Royal family forum
is deranged” comment and can take it in stride? That thread was definitely an example!

I am proposing we try again and help crowd source a guide. I just ask that we don’t be so RFF, and have a sense of humor while we do so. I’ll paste my draft attempt below. Everyone is welcome to contribute however they like.

I don't think a purely republican board would get much traction though. I've tried in the past to start threads to discuss different head of state options etc and you get a few interesting pages of discussion but there are inevitable "bin the lot of them" / "they are all benefit scroungers" comments which just shut down the discussion.

Worst is when a thread gets flagged up on Twitter by the Sussex Squad (and they have the words Sussex in their usernames so no mistake) and then there's a directed pile on that spreads to here. With the pro Sussex posters using any opportunity to criticize the monarchy / individual members because they see it as a defence of their idols. Which is an odd strategy because H&M love their royal connection.

I agree with your analysis @wordler although I do also recognise and congratulate the way in which @bluegreygreen has succesfully marshalled (rather than managed) an effective and focused discussion on the the ANL court case threads.
I suppose, I'm left wondering (Carrie stylee) - is it the marshall, the collective desire to understand complexity and a path forwards or a need to Be Right and Shout at people. I'm certainly more interested in the former rather than the latter.
The browbeating posts of some do, in my opinion, little to further their cause - epsecially when they post statements untethered to reality.

I recall one poster (possibly still here under a name change) who was so aggressive about an issue that I ended up spending about £10 to prove to myself I wasn't mistaken!

Why are you assuming they are repubicans unless they have openly said so? Is everoyne who doesn't agree with the idea a republican or ar you able to understand that unless someone has shared that they are that other people aren't?

@myrtleWilson I think it does help to have a specific topic rather than a vague free ranging one and an active OP who keeps things back on track. But that's quite a lot of work sometimes. MN is my light-hearted relief in snatched moments - I don't have the energy to police threads.

End fo the day a forum is set up with talk guidelines to help ensure certain behaviours are not allowed to flourish that should be enough to govern it. Because you would expect mature adults to be able to chat and post and get along even if they have different views, to be respectful of their views and not be diminshing them as though they are worth reading. It happens on many other boards on this forum. There is space to create threads of various viewpoints and discussions on each of them should be respectful especially if you don't agree with them.

Yet clearly as we can see (well I certainly can) that isn't possible for some and thus here we are.

Best thing is everyone to just adhere to the official guidelines and be polite and respectful and be open to other peoples views and opinions and discuss or debate or challenge politely. It's as simple as that, not hard really...

In general I don't think it's much worse here that somewhere like AIBU which can get very snarky. Maybe it feels more personal because there are regular posters interacting with each other.

But one thing this board gets that only a few others do (Feminism Sex and Gender Discussions for example is one) where new posters flood in for a targeted pile on prompted by a call to arms from somewhere like Reddit or Twitter.

It's not been so bad with that recently - worst times were post Megzit on anything Kate and William did, and especially around the 'where's Kate' period.

I fear you are not contributing in good faith and the clue is your use of this term, “boss”. That’s a rather rude label, though you claimed to dislike labels.

I and many others already replied to your first post about the idea of a separate forum, responding that it obviously would be about topics. Why are you suggesting again that it would be used to confine posters based on these made up labels? Clue number two that you aren’t attempting to contribute to this thread in good faith.

Ignoring replies you don’t like to keep repeating the same purposely obtuse remarks won’t get you any farther here than playing poker on a golf course.

It’s like getting a hole. In one.

I am not interested in playing the its worse elsewhere game. It doesn't in my opinion justify anything. There is a report feature people can use there are talk guidlines to adhere to and then there is your own choice to just ignore posts and if its affecting you the best advice is always go take a break. You don't have to add value or weight to anyone's comment, you don't have to let it affect you - its a choice.

Personally I am one of those who don't let things affect me unless it coming from my nearest and dearest whos opionions have value to me. Anyone else feel free to say what you like it doesn't impact me and I don't waste my time on it. That's just me though. Others are clearly different but as ever life is too short.

You got it in your first sentence . 😉

I respectfully disagree and actually agree with others about the proposal to split is wrong.

Republicans is a group of people, not a topic. If the proposal is to split forums by subject, then the forum should be named after the subject under discussion, not the people using it. Something like The Monarchy Debate.

It also seems to send the message that one group should leave the existing Royal Family board and discuss things elsewhere. If the concern is that some posters feel they're being driven away (which has been expressed and is valid), creating a separate forum could be seen as reinforcing that rather than addressing it.

Why should one group's preference determine where another group is expected to post? If 'Royal Family' is the topic, surely it should remain open to all viewpoints, with individual threads covering the different aspects of the subject.

To be honest I am like wtf that as adults (Some of us with children) can't even seem to be mature about having people discuss different viewpoints in the same space. I am sure noone of us are teaching our kids to be rude to other people who express different opinions.

😂😂😂

There's only a small handful of people who seem to want to actually discuss the potential of a republic - to the point of talking about options, what could work, gains, losses when the topic comes up in this forum.

I'm happy for it all to stay under the one banner of The Royal Family but if there are enough posters who really want a separate board I don't see why they can't have one. It can be like the two Feminism boards - there's some cross over between the two but both also are active enough to be justified.

You could have something like:

'The Monarchy: Past, present, future' for the serious discussions about head of state issues

'The Monarchy: Royal family chat' for the gossipy stuff which to be honest is 90% of the board.

There's only a small handful of people who seem to want to actually discuss the potential of a republic - to the point of talking about options, what could work, gains, losses when the topic comes up in this forum.

Yes, as someone who likes to understand how things work, I find it disappointing how many of the conversations about removing the monarchy have a tendency to descend into diatribes against a family, rather than looking at the complexities of constitutional and legal change, implications for the UK and the Commonwealth realms, costs v benefits, etc.

I wouldn't have suggested a split (I'm not convinced it will fix the actual problem) but I could see how your structure would work.

Respectfully, if the thought of splitting the board is so awful, then perhaps the complaints and othering of posters was not in the best interests of posters at all ! 🤷‍♀️ people have their own opinions but they are not going to align and trying to override them will only end in arguments .
nobody is trying to drive people off threads ( although I’m feeling very much like that was the intention with the attitude towards me!) disagreeing is not attacks , but disagreement perhaps there would be no need if posters could respect that everyone has the right to express themselves ( yes ! Even those critical of h and m ) , and not try to bend threads to their own will .

Yes @jeffgoldblum I agree everyone has the right to express themselves within talk guidelines, be that with gifs, memes, jokes, mindless chit chat amongst posters or the tone they choose to post in. Some posters on this thread have raised this as the reason they are “driven off the board” and want it to stop, basically that is plain old censorship and I’m sure no one wants that.

I do love a gif …as you know! , particularly if it involves me personally 😁

You handsome devil Jeff! 😈

May I add the delightful and dearly missed Sam?!

You may, nice tribute ❤️

Thanks! , apart from Sam , only Penelope Keith and Alan Rickman have left me feeling such a loss! 🌹

I've been reading all the posts about the idea of splitting the board and am on the fence about it. I can see how a division in the way you suggest makes logical sense, if people stayed on topic. However I can't see how dividing the board in two would help with the interpersonal problems that have also been written about in this thread.

Posters are going to disagree however narrow the focus of a specific board. Posters are going to offend and take offence, some are going to be rude without, or with, provocation. I also agree with the poster who said that this board, like the Feminism one, does sometimes attract people from other online places who come only to attack, although fortunately that hasn't happened for a while and let's hope it stays in the past.

I don't think there is an easy answer beyond policing our own tone, giving grace where possible to others, and if that isn't possible simply not engaging. Since the Where's Kate threads I've realised the report function is largely pointless. We have to engage in the way we want to be engaged with because ultimately online forums need clicks and those are driven by contraversy and conflict.

🙉🙉🙉 not listening @jeffgoldblum we haven't seen him on TV recently because he is on a sabbatical, that is all.

Yes - you have hit the nail on the head.

The board needs to be renamed - the current title is extremely old fashioned in any case . Call it the monarchy debate .

Or - I also agree with a new board placed elsewhere called the Monarchy Debate. Actually I prefer that .
Leave the ‘royal’ board for those happy with this set up and fresh start with the new name for others

I partially agree just not about new boards because I ahree with previous poster some people will still go between in bad faith.

I have decided to start a thread to debate the monarchy in modern times so hopefully yourself and other who are interested in that type of conversation have a safe space to do so 😀