Best advice for Harry going forward?

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I have all the same initial reactions as many others on MN regarding Harry i.e. whiner, grifter, stupid, entitled etc and it's easy to dole out the criticism.

However while I wouldn't say I have sympathy for him, as so much of his situation is of his own making, I actually do have some underlying feelings of concern for him and his future (and children).

He reminds me an awful lot of a relative of mine who is neurodiverse with a mild learning disability and a tendency to be self-absorbed with an overdeveloped victim complex - always lashing out, blaming others, seeing conspiracy where there is none etc.

Harry is clearly a damaged man, with childhood trauma and issues which continue to plague his mental health.
As with my relative, he has grown up with a support network which has probably quietly managed and enabled his passage through life, but when big outbursts happen (as have happened in our family too) everyone backs off and 'grey rocks' him until he has calmed down. Some people just give up, too exhausted by the constant drama of it all.

Too true, Jeff. It's a lie that keeps being told. There is absolutely no comparison to the tawdry, dishonest and vulgar tome that Harry made £millions from, and continued to tout his lies around any tabloid hack or low level magazine that would print his whining rant.

Exactly!!
even his parents two tv interviews don’t compare! , neither reached his level of poisonous lies and manipulation.

Plus, it didn't go on for years and make them millions.

Another good point!!!
doing it for a payday makes it a million times worse!

Sorry, I'm going on Jeff, but the comparison of "Spare" to the Dimbleby book is posted on here time and time again, and it's just another lie that's perpetuated to excuse the vile behaviour of Harry.

Sticking to a prescribed list of topics is quite a goalpost move, even on the assumption that Harry would be fine with having no information about his dad's health and not make a Netflix special about that. And one of these you've mentioned here is potentially hugely incendiary.

If the RF are unable to come to a security 'compromise' that Harry is happy with, which is a realistic possibility even taking the claims about their influence on the process at their absolute highest, that obviously raises the possibility he'll talk again. There could be nothing at all untoward on the part of the RF, seeing as how they're not actually in sole charge here, and it still cause real problems if and when Harry talks. He could easily reveal information that leads to security issues. So no, it still doesn't follow that they can just 'behave decently' and thus circumvent the problem of Harry failing to keep matters confidential.

Not C of E so not my wheelhouse.

Harry is unable to get back on track on his own and MM's is the only opinion he listens to.

Do you really think that he listens to her opinion? I think that she’s doing the right thing of looking for new income opportunities while he will have spent shocking amounts on his court cases. I suspect she’d rather he earn money than spend it on lawyers and posting a new pic of the kids to distract from the negative headlines.

In the light of everything that happened, I am sure both Charles and Diana regretted their books and interviews where they divulged infidelity. It opened a door which can never be closed although William is different - he was around to absorb the fallout of his parents’ war of words. They were both, at the time, utterly self absorbed. It has made William very reserved in many ways and now Harry is like a ticking time bomb.
What does Harry get from them? I am not sure. He’s supposed to not like fame but he knows he makes the headlines with them.
If he ever divorces, it will become an epic battle.
If I were him I’d want a quiet life in my 40’s.

Ok so Charles didn’t write it, but same difference with Harry. They both worked with someone who effectively wrote a book on their behalf.

And no I didn’t read it; watching the obsequious Dimbleby televised interview was quite sufficient.

And if you actually read Spare; Harry didn’t say anything that bad! A lot was made of it at the time but I am sure he could have revealed a lot more and said a lot worse tbh.

Also, you can’t really equate the two because Charles’s book was published thirty years ago, so it’s bound to be different in tone and content. The climate in which Charles’s book was written was more deferential , and as the internet was only in its infancy in 1994, extracts weren’t spun by media outlets across the globe in to people’s mobile phones. Therefore not a fair comparison.

Oh I'd forgotten the "on Mummy's life". Shame on Harry for monetising something so very personal that should have stayed that way and poor William.

@Hardcrustsfromnowon654 yaving read spare I came away absolutely disgusted with Harry.

I actually think in parts it was worse than was portrayed. I’d never forgive him if I was William.

Harry goes on about mental health without giving a fig about his father’s, brother’s or sister in law’s.

Shame on him and shame on those making light of it.

No , Harry had a ghost writer so was fed the information which was then turned into something ( barely) readable .
Dimbleby was not a ghost writer .

They can't make him King which TBH seems to be what he actually wants to have the top job.

@tortieCatLover I remember reading decades ago that apparently William said he wasn't sure if he wanted to be King and Harry's response was "You don't want to be King? Fine, I'll be King".

I thought at the time it was just kids being kids but I'm not so sure now.

It is not the "same difference". They are completely different.
Yes I have read Spare. It is a nasty, whining, deceitful book. He reveals very, very personal details and invades the privacy of his family. He then spent years touting the stories round media outlets and made millions.
There is no comparison. At all.

Yes, you're absolutely right. Harry wanted to tell his story - or rather, make millions out of the personal and private lives of his family, a litany of complaints and very personal issues. So he employed JR Moehringer (who said Harry worked at a "glacial pace").
Dimbleby wrote a biography and asked Charles for details, with which he complied.
If anyone thinks that these 2 books, or the behaviour of these 2 men is in anyway comparative, I find it strange!

I agree. It is a shameful book.

We’ll have to disagree on our opinion about it then I’m afraid as I didn’t have the same reaction to it at all.

We will indeed. Imagine making millions by telling people about William's penis. What a vile man.
Quite different to Charles telling Dimbleby about the importance of organic farming, but that's just my opinion.

He reveals very, very personal details and invades the privacy of his family.

Not just his family, but people he barely knew who are not in public life at all.

Absolutely. His "first time" and that poor matron at the school.

Are you suggesting that Dimbleby wrote his book without Charles’s permission?

Funny that, because in this article in Town & Country, Dimbleby writes of Charles;

https://www.townandcountrymag.com/society/tradition/a41781126/prince-charles-jonathan-dimbleby-interview-how-

“I am sure he does not regret his co-operation over the book”. “It is a balanced and thoroughly researched appraisal of the Prince of Wales's development as an individual and the way he has developed his role," a spokesman for Charles said of the book at the time of publication. In addition, a Buckingham Palace spokesman said it was "substantially factually accurate."

So it was actually endorsed by the Palace!

And I doubt that Charles would have allowed Dimbleby to film over 180 hours of footage for his documentary had the two not had some sort of very well defined agreement! So posters trying to make out that Dimbleby wrote the book without the tacit agreement of Charles are completely wrong.

No-one has said that. Charles co-operated with Dimbleby, we've said that. It's not the point - it's the continuing claim that the book is in any shape or form similar to "Spare".
"Spare" is a completely different book in tone, content and impact. They're just miles apart!

And as I said, thirty years on, it’s hardly surprising that the tone and content are different, as publishers and readers have different expectations nowadays.

And frankly, I think talking about your marriage on tv, and having your spokesmen admit to an affair a day later, when your sons are about twelve and nine years old and away at boarding school is pretty grim tbh!

Much worse than talking about your brother’s todger that no one really cares about!

So my point is that the two are very comparable. And moreover, Diana was persuaded to do her interview in response to Charles’s remember? A small detail that people like to skate over nowadays. It must have been hell for those children.

I thought we'd agreed to disagree? I'm not going to talk about Harry's book any further. It's crass, vulgar and cruel. He made millions from it, so I hope he's happy.
That's all I have to say, so I will end it there.

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