As Ever #3 As If

[PrettyFlyforaMaiTai]

Another thread to discuss the rebranding of ARO and the merchandising of With Love, Meghan

Part 2: www.mumsnet.com/talk/the_royal_family/5278062-as-ever-2-whatever

She did The Tig, her previous lifestyle blog, well before she married H, and that was very much along the same lines - the familiar visuals of dogs on couches, beaches, shots of burgers and fries, M making fresh pasta. She called it "This brainchild of mine – of inspired living and dreams coming true, of food and fashion, fancy friends, of role models that make the earth shake"
There are also posts and photos related to her role as a global ambassador for World Vision.

Here's a C&P from a post called Champions of Change:
'“Things were different then,” my grandfather said.'
'“Meggie, on our road trip, when we went to Kentucky Fried Chicken, we had to go to the back for ‘coloreds.’ The kitchen staff handed me the chicken from the back door and we ate in the parking lot. That’s just what it was.”'
'That’s just what it was.'
'That story still haunts me. It reminds me of how young our country is. How far we’ve come and how far we still have to come. It makes me think of the countless black jokes people have shared in front of me, not realizing I am mixed. Unaware that I am the ethnically ambiguous fly on the wall.'

I would imagine the preacher was totally out of Meghan's experience!

I thought the wedding preacher was great, @CoffeeCantata, but he also brought out one of the best posts I've ever seen on here:

"Someone's going to have to tackle him to the floor in a minute"

Typo

Did she challenge the black jokes? Has dating and marrying a succession of monied white men signaled the empowerment of African Americans in some way? Or a lifestyle blog about frivolous living and hanging out with your (mostly) white, rich friends? Or worshipping your husband's British, Caucasian, dead mother?

Or a lifestyle blog about frivolous living

Which frankly barely anyone had heard of.

I don't think it's fair to oblige her to do any of those things though. I'm from a mixed background myself, and wouldn't like to beholden to doing it "right".

Ironically the first time I noticed her was in the episode of Suits where her black dad shows up, and I said to DH I didn't realise she was mixed.

Don't you? You wouldn't challenge a racist joke told in front of you? I'm second generation Indian, and I've had to do it, but then I'm old and grew up in less enlightened times.

As for the rest, she can live however she likes and marry whoever she likes. Why she's held up as the victim of her own life choices, and why her incredibly privileged life has led her to a state of permanent victimhood on a par with the worst victims of prejudice, is what confuses me.

I came to look for a thread to see if anyone was discussing her now looking to sell pancake and biscuit mixes?

It's not a competition.

Everyone's experience is their own. Everyone has their own row to hoe.

Dismissing someone's experience on grounds that others have it worse is the race to the bottom attitude that makes society an ugly place.

I actually think it’s up to her to challenge racist jokes made in front of her. Her choice. Maybe the director did it. Maybe her friend’s new boyfriend did. Of course everyone “should”, but given the vast vast vast majority of her friend group don’t appear to be black and frankly a lot of people didn’t realise she has any black heritage, I wouldn’t blame her for just thinking Not Today Thank You. It takes a lot to “out” yourself in front of a lot of white people who see it as mere banter when there is zero advantage to you in making your boss roll his eyes at your lack of humour or your friend thinking “did you have to be woke right NOW, he’s shy”.

if there is any disadvantage to Meghan speaking out she won’t do it. And that’s fine. She pulled herself together for that shooting weekend where all Harry’s friends discovered she was “woke”. But that was in her own favour. She managed to isolate him a bit further. But depending on how you think of the situation in the round, yes she did that but did she also call them out rightly? It just helped her cause dually.

One’s perspective is coloured so much by the motivation of saying or not saying something.

I think it's everyone's job to challenge racist jokes!!

HAM have dropped another parody video of H&M touting their new product line. I'll not give any spoilers but it is very funny!

She has made plenty of money herself.

Her own father is a white man - what is your problem with her having white men in her life? What's your problem with her having white friends? She has black friends too, incidentally.

Lifestyle blogs are by definition about the lifestyle or image you want to broadcast. Her choice to do a blog about a well-off mixed race woman who enjoys success in her chosen career and spends her large disposable income as she sees fit is an anti racist statement because it is modeling career, financial, and lifestyle success.

She's not the only woman on the planet to admire Diana.

Doria’s definitely tough but she could be ditched like everyone else if she says anything that gets taken the wrong way and it would be very hurtful.

Would she 'silent' or 'silenced' or given the 'silent treatment'!

Did she challenge the black jokes?

@FromThePrismOfJammyTodger
She got called a woke fun sponge by certain sections of the British press for challenging Harry's friends' idea of humour early in their relationship, iirc.

Damned if she did and damned if she didn't, eh?

Of course everyone SHOULD challenge racist “jokes” but I don’t really blame anyone black for wanting the day off from educating idiots. And I guess a lot of those people hear it from people who can sack them or not put business there way or who could ostracise them at a family party. White people would actually have more headspace to do it. Just less authority on the subject.

ANYWAY. That one article was literally the only time I have ever seen any flicker of authenticity from Meghan! Obviously it’s vanished now!

You're setting up a false premise. I didn't say I have a problem with her relationships. I am asking you how any of her choices empower African Americans. I'm still not sure how you think blogging about the highly superficial life of a woman whom many did not know was black does this. I'd also like to know why this - in your view - highly successful woman who has "modeled career, financial and lifestyle success" claims the level of victimhood that she does.

She does not merely admire Diana. She thinks she is Diana, and rejoices in her daughter being like Diana. Again, I don't see the anti racist message in this behaviour.

I disagree. I think outrageous claims of victimhood by some of the most privileged people on the planet makes society an ugly place.

That all sounds like sour grapes to me. You don't have to agree she's been a victim of anything, but you don't have to dismiss her with the level of bile I see here.

Well that's a pivot, isn't it. You are not answering the question. She had the privilege of passing for white, from the sounds of what you posted. She chose to be silent when her friends were being racist. Fair enough if that's her choice. Some of us don't have that privilege. But she's not a victim of the choice she made to remain silent.

What were Harry's friends' idea of humour? Did that include racism, which is the subject at hand? Why should Meghan care what the press is saying if she believes she is right? How is she the victim of the choice she made to speak up, when she got exactly what she wanted from speaking up, and is living her best life?

What is sour grapes about stating a fact? Are you disputing that she's one of the most privileged people on the planet?

Thanks, I am still laughing 🤣

@FromThePrismOfJammyTodger

You're setting up a false premise. I didn't say I have a problem with her relationships.
I am asking you how any of her choices empower African Americans.
You implied there was problem when you asked how it empowered African Americans.

I'm still not sure how you think blogging about the highly superficial life of a woman whom many did not know was black does this.
Her own blog was very clear that she was mixed race. It's on you you if you miss those clear statements. Also on you if you don't understand how being mixed race is very often interpreted as black in the US.
I'd also like to know why this - in your view - highly successful woman who has "modeled career, financial and lifestyle success" claims the level of victimhood that she does.
Being marked as black (or a POC or any other label for someone not white) means you are automatically "other" and "less than" in the eyes of many in white America. Showing that she overcame the institutional barriers to black success is an inspiring narrative to others.
As a black person enjoying any success in the US, your achievement will very often be diminished by being considered the result of affirmative action, DEI hiring, or some sort of easier entry into university or a profession that white people allegedly have to work harder to get into. Over 77 million Americans agree with Donald Trump on this, and he rewarded his core voters with his earliest executive orders. There is a deep seam of resentment based on pure, unadulterated racism there that he successfully mined in his election campaign. If you want to talk about false victimhood, I suggest you start there.

She does not merely admire Diana. She thinks she is Diana, and rejoices in her daughter being like Diana. Again, I don't see the anti racist message in this behaviour.
That's all your opinion, which you're entitled to.
'IMO' is a useful caveat because it signals you understand the difference between opinion and fact.

"Highly superficial" is also in the eye of the beholder.
It was a successful blog in a space that isn't the mothership of seriousness.

Also - newsflash - black people can present themselves any way they wish, on their own terms, just as anyone else can. They can wear fashion, enjoy restaurants, cut flowers, dogs, go on vacation, swim in the ocean, travel. Showing yourself as a multifaceted person and not merely presenting yourself as a poster child for what white people think you should represent is empowering. It challenges tokenism.

Still with the bile, I see.

Still with the none answer, I see.

By the way, are you a person of colour yourself?

You have posted a load of word salad about how her lifestyle and bloody beige interiors signals the achievement of African American success. I am asking you how that is so. I can see it's a signal of her success. But no more than her success, which is a very unique success, isn't it? It's in no way typical of the experience of your average human being, let alone your average American of whatever colour. So how are you making the leap?

How did Meghan overcome the institutional barriers to black success in the US? She said herself, in her Netflix docusoap, that nobody had "treated her like a black woman" (her words) before she got together with Harry. What barriers was she overcoming if they weren't put in front of her in her own experience?

What has any of this got to do with DEI and Donald Trump? She was writing the Tig and enjoying success on Suits when the US had a black president. You may remember him, his name was Barack Obama. He spent 8 years as the most powerful man on the planet.

I think my opinions on Meghan's Diana worship are probably on the money, especially as they are based on her words and actions, such as her delight in the blue, blue, blue eyes of her daughter, speaking to her gravestone and dressing up as her.

"Highly superficial" is also in the eye of the beholder.
It was a successful blog in a space that isn't the mothership of seriousness.

Well if her blog wasn't in a serious space, then it's gong to be superficial isn't it. Pictures of your dogs being cute and burgers isn't serious by any objective measure.

As to your last paragraph. Yes, I know, I do all those things myself. You are the one who thinks Meghan represents an African American success story as if all African Americans are the same and aspire to her brand of "success". IMO (see what I did there) she represents nobody but herself.