These are words from the horse's mouth, and they speak volumes.
"But I just picked up the phone and I called the Queen just to check in."
Nobody just picked up the phone and called the Queen. Nobody. There were a few landlines which, if they rang, might have been picked up by HMQ if she were there and wanted to be disturbed. She was able to call out; calls in were routed through an operator. Some people will have had the extension: private secretaries, this or that advisor, a child, maybe even a grandchild. For Meghan to say this out loud, on TV, is Meghan wanting to tell a story and make a point about herself: I contacted the Queen when her husband had been admitted to hospital. I humanized the situation. I'm normal and relatable and modern. They're not.
This is also one of the rare occasions when Meghan called HMQ "the Queen". Of course, this is because it suits her to do so in recounting this story of closeness to the monarch and her humazing them. In this instance, calling HMQ "the Queen" works to bring the monarch down to her level, and to elevate Meghan to I-have-her-phone-number closeness to a monarch. In instances where that's not possible, where Meghan is on the receiving end, Harry's relatives are ALWAYS referred to as "his father", "his mother", "his brother", "his granny" etc.
"That's what we do," she explained, "being able to default to not having to every moment go, 'Is that appropriate?' "
That's what we do: as though there's a long history of relationships which have enabled a personality/identity to be formed within this institution. True for him, not for her. But through marriage she's able to piggy-back off him (seeing as the words came from her) in a joint intention to set out their stall by opposition to the RF's. That is how they do things, and this is how we do things: we're level, just on different playing fields. And I'm doing this interview to tell you that between them and us, I'm with you, the people, on your playing field. I'm the one you really need to look up to because, like Diana, I'm the only one who really gets you - I'm just like you (but better because I'm royal). Harry will be along in a minute to tell you that when he met me, that's what he saw in me: that I have that common touch that his mother had. That I should be the queen of people's hearts, just like she was.
Not having to every moment go, 'Is that appropriate': this is the key. You SHOULD have to go at every moment "is that appropriate". Not because the person in question was the Queen, not because you might think the phones are tapped, not because you think the press might write something. Because you're not the center of attention, things aren't always about you, this wasn't about you. It was about an elderly woman coming to the end of a long marriage, with 4 children/4 children-in-law/8 grandchildren/however many grandchildren-in-law/however many great-grandchildren/ counselors and advisors/ a responsibility to Parliament for private family affairs/ etc etc, coming to the point where the writing was on the wall for her husband, an event which would have repercussions for the country. She absolutely SHOULD have asked herself "is it appropriate for this woman to hear from a granddaughter-in-law she's known for 3 years at this point in time, or should I send a message through one of her aides; or perhaps wake my husband up and let him take the reins?". Meghan has told everyone clearly what she thinks of herself, a hierarchy that she chose to marry into, and her standing in it. There's plenty of other supporting 'evidence' (wrong word, can't think of the right one): it's appropriate to pick up the phone and "just check in" with the Queen, but apparently it's not appropriate to return your wedding and engagement rings to your ex-husband in person; it's not appropriate to talk to your elderly father when you think he's betrayed you; etc etc. "Appropriate" means "appropriate FOR MY BENEFIT".
"Whereas with us it was just like, just be yourself," the Duke of Sussex said. "Just be genuine. Just be authentic. If you get it wrong, get it wrong, if you get it right you get it right."
This is where it all went wrong. Harry should know better. He should know that "authentic" doesn't mean just saying what you think because it's what you think and therefore must be real and true and valuable and relevant or interesting or worthwhile. He should know that if you get it wrong, there will be consequences. He should know that being yourself isn't what's required at all time and in all situations in that world (or indeed any world!). But he married a woman who fuels his paranoia and insecurities with California-style glib aphorisms and verbiage, presented with absolute confidence like the gospel truth, descended from heaven like rain kissing the sunny Pacific-lapped earth, onto people who believe that they hold a - the only! - higher truth (this is almost every LA-dweller I've ever met, incidentally - it's cultural). The sordid reality, as Harry is no doubt finding out, is that this gospel (like every preceding Cali cult) is pretty icing on a rotten cake made of greed, money, vanity, hubris, and alllll the vices. They all know their hypocrisy and they're all aware of their duplicity, it's just idiot Harry who fell for Instagram version of it.