Thomas is also not in this book, why is he being raised on this thread?
Because conversation has turned to the angling for a Christmas invitation, and there's a suggestion reconciliation with Thomas is one of the cards on that negotiation table, placed there by Charles. Do you understand the concept of an evolving conversation?
If H&M are right to avoid the Markles because of all their public tittle tattle (and I don't disagree with you there - I'd give the entire Markle clan a wide berth), then you need to accept that the RF is right to avoid H&M for their very public and much more damaging tittle tattle. H&M have done exactly what Samantha, ThomasJr etc have done - they've just done it with higher production values.
As to consorting with racists - well, Meghan, I'm afraid, married the only on record racist in the current RF. I'm a woman of Indian heritage, you can't tell me that the man who referred to his colleague as a P* is someone with "unconscious bias" or some such nonsense. That's overt, nasty racism of the sort I've experienced repeatedly. I doubt it was an isolated incident.
And blackmail? Well again, neither Harry nor Meghan are above that, are they? The hints of the 400 pages that couldn't be printed in Spare because they were too damaging. The hints of the Meghan biography and "her truth". The hints of the alleged racist that could not be named, but hung over everyone's heads for 2 years (and then heavily back-tracked in the Harry/Tom Bradby interview, much to everyone's astonishment). What was the entire enterprise of Spare and the Netflix doc other than some elaborate and dolled up version of a blackmail tape? Do as I say, give me the apologies and funding I want, otherwise I will tell all and not stop.
So yes, if you want to say forgiveness should not extend to Thomas Markle for his role in creating a public shit storm, then don't apply a double standard of required forgiveness to people like William, Catherine, Charles and Camilla, who have been absolutely vilified because of repeated, public, allegations made by H&M against them - and all for millions of dollars that they have pocketed at the cost of others' distress and the airing of private family business.