Harry and Gabor

[laurwalsh]

My friend just sent me this. I adore Gabor mate and the work he does. His book 'in the realms of hungry ghosts' was life changing for me who had suffered serious addiction issues. But am I being too harsh to feel disappointed he's jumping on this band wagon of garbage. I'm sorry but Harry we're sick of listening to your trauma and no offence you've sung it to death, (and I don't even think it's that bad relative to how much he has gone on and on about it) and trauma aside you're a complete hypocrite with how you've treated you're family and the trauma you've put them through!!

@Roussette

as a parent of children with adhd, and giant adhd thread running through my family, I genuinely worry about adhd and addiction so I found Harry’s casual endorsement of drug taking worrying

Perhaps you should google adhd and addiction and then come back and we can have an informed debate ? But I suggest sources other than Gabor Mate

“**

I have read this thread and yes I stick by 'incensed'. Not everyone of course. I personally don't lump everyone in together.

If only it were just 'discussion' without the insults being thrown around. For instance...

"I feel very sorry for their children,He needs to STFU, He's whoring himself out, He's a dick,His poor poor kids, he's a drug taking idiot who has sex in fields, and yes...
the insults about their parenting are on this thread. I won't repeat it as I dont want to give it oxygen.

You say report. There is no point anymore, MN have decided anything goes. Some of what is said would not be allowed if it were anyone else but M&H.

Your post makes no sense. And you are welcome to refer to me by name as opposed to 'this poster' which is quite frankly just rude. You an't dehumanise me like that lol

I am not tied in knots thanks. Quite chilled. Just expressing an opinion. Were you the post who said because I use exclamation marks I am desperate and rattled? !

And I am not 'unconsciously cross and disappointed with PH'. That is so funny because it means that you cannot stand anyone saying anything that isn't criticism about him and you have to find a reason because you are so puzzled about it!

There are quite a few of us around you know!

@Howsimplywonderful Have you read Gabor's work about the root cause of ADHD? It might help you.

@0o0o0o0

if you believe adhd is based in trauma and is curable, this is not what most of the experts in this field believe.

@Maireas

Another example:

“Meghan is a woman who thinks she is a deep thinker and humanist/feminist, when the reality is shes an internet influencer and C list actress. No depth and as superficial as they come. It didn't need south park to show this.”

You said that you had not seen any criticism of Meghan on here.

Its here, and it’s unnecessary on a thread titled “Harry and Gabor’

Its just more piling onto Meghan.

Its just unnecessary but it doesn’t have to get to slut shaming or parent shaming to be distasteful. There are another few that discuss her parenting in negative terms. How could they know what sort of parent Meghan is? They are going by one sentence she said in an interview. God forbid someone judge my parenting on a sentence I said. As parents we all say and do silly things at times.

I’ve seen much much worse said about Meghan on other threads.

"I feel very sorry for their children,He needs to STFU, He's whoring himself out, He's a dick,His poor poor kids, he's a drug taking idiot who has sex in fields, and yes...

Let’s break that down

“I feel very sorry for their children” - a valid balanced opinion to express.

“He needs to STFU” - you’ve said this yourself in different words.

“He's whoring himself out” - unpleasant language but factually correct as there is a financial transaction for this ‘act of service’

“He's a dick” - some people may come to that conclusion reflecting on his words and actions depending on their own values and moral compass.

“His poor poor kids” valid opinion to express in light of his behaviour depending on your own values of how parents should behave.

“he's a drug taking idiot who has sex in fields” - all of that is factually correct from the horses mouth - only ‘idiot’ is subjective - and is a valid descriptor if your own values and moral compass don’t align with his behaviors.

Why don’t you start a thread about Meghan’s parenting and how amazing or not it’s going to be on another thread and let us continue our discussion on Gabor mate and Harry without this noise

You justify the insults all you like ooompaloompa

I don;t agree that it's talk of how awful his parenting is, how him and Meghan are going to damage their children. If just 1% of what is said about their parenting was said about W&K there would be a massive outcry. But anything goes with M&H.

You don't need to break it all down for me.

I can’t work out who you are addressing this post to?

Me?

I didn't start it. Pages back there are posts about their parenting. Maybe tackle those posters instead?
I agree with you for what it's worth, criticising their parenting is very very wrong, and maybe those who think they have damaged their children for life should start a thread and say it. Instead it gets hidden as concern on here.

I;m assuming me

@Roussette 👍

It’s just a different perspective - you see these phrases you listed as ‘insults’ - I suspect because you have an especially heightened personal sensitivity, reactivity and defensiveness of PH - others may see the phrases you listed not as insults but as calm open discussion points informed both with facts and where their own subjective values and moral compass around expectations of behaviour in public life.

Harry triggers the royalists because Harry is real . I'd say 'authentic' but that word seems to trigger them too
Why?
Because 'royalty' is built on lies and the facade must be maintained at all times .

I suspect because you have an especially heightened personal sensitivity, reactivity and defensiveness of PH

What in god's name are you on about?! Are you trying to diagnose me? What do you mean about MY heightened personal sensitivity... you are talking complete BS, honestly it just makes me laugh.

Can I make a suggestion. You stop making your posts so personal about the poster. Any poster. It's really not the thing to do. I am not posting about your personality, so perhaps you should stop that. Just a thought.

And yet Harry has said recently in his interview on ITV before the release of Spare that he believes in the monarchy, so he is a “royalist”too, don’t you think?

I have not watched any of Harry's interviews or read his book, so my perspective is based on the soundbites and extracts I have seen and read.

However, I don't think the parenting criticism is solely and purely because its Harry and Meghan. If I looked at it from a more personal perspective, if my brother was publicly extolling the virtue of narcotics and spouting loads of psychobabble, was estranged from his family and my sister in laws family, I would absolutely be worried for my nieces and nephew, I would be heartbroken and terrified for them, I would probably try some intervention in the hope he / they would see sense. Equally, I would be horrified that my sister in law was supportive of his drug taking.

If it was W&K publicly saying the same stuff that H is saying, they would absolutely and rightfully be slaughtered publicly for it. . K got loads of criticism for her early years programme, with comparisons and critique about their nannies, private schooling, her being a stay at home mom for the kids younger years. W&K get their fair share of criticism from all corners too.

I just wonder about Gabor Mate diagnosing someone from reading his book,

Most experts in his field use a series of tests and a number of interviews to diagnose, it it’s no wonder many professionals have condemned it along with giving someone a diagnosis live on air

when I got my children’s diagnosis it took a while to process and unpick everything in the report. I can’t imagine having to do that in public

criticising their parenting is very very wrong

I would genuinely like help to understand why this is wrong. I don't know much about their parenting so I haven't got many opinions, but I would like to understand the principle of why this would be off limits.

Most of the posters here are not 'royalists' even those who are favourable towards the monarchy, and it's a very outdated term I see thrown about, I'm not ' triggered' by anything as that's a new woo phrase also thrown about with abandon now.
However I do find it irritating, so from now on I will refer to republicans who use it as ' Roundheads ' .
Which is the time appropriate opposite to ' royalists' .

What term do you suggest ?

Because what has been said on these threads is pretty damn horrible. I've never seen it about another couple or mother on MN, except when it's been horrific crimes. Or maybe Katie Price who has problems and doesn't always have her children living with her.

I wish I could list all that has been said.

They come across as very loving parents to me. But on here some posts have said they are damaging their children long term, their children will have MH problems, their children will hate them when they grow up etc etc. That's just a mild snippet, there's far far more. Is that OK? Who knows what their parenting is like, but I imagine it is warm and loving. They don't deserve that sort of criticism about their parenting.

Sorry that was to @FloorWipes who worded her question in a genuine way.