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The royal family

Just finished 'Spare'...

1000 replies

HerReputationMadeItDifficultToProceed · 14/01/2023 22:02

… and I encourage anyone who’s even vaguely interested in this story to give it a read. Especially if what’s been leaked has made you at all angry, because I think in context everything makes a lot of sense.

I wasn’t a Harry and Meghan hater before reading this, but I wasn’t a fan girl either. Like many Brits, I find a lot of Americans- especially West Coast Americans- quite irritating and Meghan firmly falls into that camp for me. I’m sure she’s nice enough, but she’s very American and very perky and much like Wednesday Addams, I don’t do perky. However, I suspect that her intentions and generally good and that like most of us she’s got good and bad qualities. She’s clearly ambitious and I think that she probably initially dated Harry based on that ambition and on getting a platform, although I think that she genuinely loves him now.

The ghost writer has done a great job at capturing Harry’s personality I think; he comes across as introspective and thoughtful but funny and bright.

I think that Harry has a good soul; I think that he’s kind and has had a hard time of it growing up. I also think he’s a bit clueless and naive and has been in a bubble, but I think he acknowledges that and wants to understand and change. Undoubtedly losing his mother at the age he was had more of an outward impact on him than it had on William. He’s also been a victim of his dad’s wishywashy parenting. It sounds like- and looks like to me from my vantage point as a normal citizen who knows bugger all except what I’ve seen in the media- that Charles has been there for his kids to an extent, but not in a hands on or especially useful way. It also seems clear that Charles has always put Camilla first. From almost the moment Diana died it seems that he wanted, above everything else, to rehabilitate Camilla’s image so that they could marry. I think that he put that above being a father and the way Harry writes about their relationship makes that clear too.

I also think that it’s suited the palace to portray Harry as dimwitted and feckless to show William in a better light and that Harry has every right to be angry about that and not want to play that game anymore (and to call it out now). Especially as it’s obvious that the palace haven’t kept up their side of the bargain and protected Harry from the media in return.

I also think that the media have treated H and M poorly and it’s clearly the case that the palace has used them and news stories about them to divert from other newsworthy problems… certainly Prince Andrew, perhaps William’s affair/s. Is Harry overly jumpy about the media and the paparazzi in particular? Yes, of course. Who wouldn’t be with his background. But they’ve also obviously been hounded and harassed.

I do think that Harry is on a journey that he isn’t at the end of yet, but I think that he realises that too. I think that he was always going to leave the royal family and that Meghan didn’t cause what’s happened, she was just the catalyst for it. I think that he’s been scapegoated and an afterthought within his nuclear family and I don’t blame him for being angry. I think that he means well and is essentially good. And I don’t think that anyone who’s read the whole book would be able to disagree.

More than anything I think it’s clear that the British Royal Family is no longer fit for purpose; the way they live, bring up their children, pay their members for work and demand unrealistic levels of protocol and formality is no longer working in the 21st century. These people need purpose and lives beyond the crown and those on the edges of the heir shouldn’t have to live their lives in service of the their. Realistically H and M could have worked as royals and had private interests, the RF chose not to bend to help them live fulfilling lives because of its own, outdated reasons.

OP posts:
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Lozois99 · 16/01/2023 18:34

I read it and came to much the same conclusion as you OP. I think anyone who reads it and still thinks badly of M&H need to go away and look up empathy in the dictionary. I believe everything he’s said, it’s not like anyone happily goes LC with their family. I also heard the royal family are actually secretly relieved the business about Williams affair wasn’t brought up. A lot of Harry’s anger comes from how his nasty entitled shagger of a brother gets off
scot free in the press while Meghan who is generally just a sweet person has been vilified for absurd reasons.

Vynalbob · 16/01/2023 18:38

Coffeetableposhbooks · 14/01/2023 22:38

Ok so you read it. You believe it. You’re summarising it and presenting a summary of Harry’s view and have applied absolutely no critical thinking to it, and completely ignore there is two sides, clear lies and an abhorrent attach on direct family

cheers mate. Enjoy your kool aid.

Exactly this...
It's like someone watching 'The Crown' and thinking it's in fact verbatim truth / history.

To me I think it's an easy cheap shot way to make a living (taking chunks out of a family that never replies in public)

Throwing a tantrum after not getting his way

Going to the US and seeking any possible way to sell their story no matter the cost to his family or the armed forces (recent comments)

Colluding with the US press (who he hates oh sorry just UK press)

He was the one that had to be helped to cleanse his image Invictus Games (pre-Meg) as he was heading towards being the Prince Andrew of his generation .....people have selective memories (eg nazi uniform party)

Roussette · 16/01/2023 18:43

awaynboilyurheid · 16/01/2023 18:18

How v insightful thank you for pointing that out…..

Why come on here then? A thread about a book.. to say what you did? Why not just ignore the thread

Strange.

JustDoingMe · 16/01/2023 18:45

Thank you for such a measured review.

Clarabell77 · 16/01/2023 18:47

NameChangeGin · 14/01/2023 22:08

Wow that's a long post! I read the first few sentences. Sounds like you're saying it's nicely written etc.. and trying to give a balanced view.

I don't care really what the comtent of the book is. The fact it's been written, gives personal details of his family without their consent, and puts down members of his family for the world to see, is enough for me to form an opinion.

The fact H&M have done countless interviews, are v hypocritical and H is massively undermining the monarchy, openly dissing the UK and our traditions. Again, that's enough for me to form an opinion.

My opinion is H&M have no morals, have sold their souls and are, in Harry's words, in bed with the devil. For what?

The institution (family) leaked untrue stories about them and allowed the media to trash his wife to the point she felt suicidal. That’s what I call having no morals and being in bed with the devil.

For what? Just off the top of my head, to set the record straight, to put the truth out there, to let the British taxpayer see what they’re paying for…

Clarabell77 · 16/01/2023 18:51

Crabo · 16/01/2023 08:54

Funny then all the journalists who have been talked to have denied the Queen ever briefing against members of her family. It’s something she didn’t do. The only ‘briefing’ they got was ‘recollections vary’. I suppose that is what Harry’s paranoid mind considers ‘years of briefings!

Well if the journalists say it it must be true…

Ninjapot · 16/01/2023 18:57

I've just finished it. Given that the couple have been proved on many occasions to have lied I would feel gullible if I believed everything said in the book. As it is, who knows what is truth, what is exaggeration and what is fabrication? I certainly wouldn't take it as a basis for forming an opinion of the royals.

Easy to write this, knowing that the people you are attacking will never fight back with their own sides of the story.

Blossomtoes · 16/01/2023 18:57

Clarabell77 · 16/01/2023 18:51

Well if the journalists say it it must be true…

There must be a scintilla of truth if they’re all saying the same thing, don’t you think?

Atethehalloweenchocs · 16/01/2023 18:59

I have started it but not got very far yet, but your assessment sounds very fair. The culture clash is very real - returned from living there for 13 years and found the settling back in really hard. Things are just done differently. It is a pity that so many people here struggle with west coast approaches - it can be flaky, but there are nice sides to it too and things they do really well.

Louisa21 · 16/01/2023 19:07

Excellent book review

Mittens1717 · 16/01/2023 19:08

wintersdreams · 15/01/2023 00:05

To be fair to be him, he lost his Mum at what, 12? Had a rather absent father in Charles and was then forced to grieve in the public eye. Privilege and wealth aside, I’d say that’s a pretty hard and traumatic thing for any child to deal with.

Exactly, money doesnt solve all of lifes problems I'm afraid

CallMeBettyBoop · 16/01/2023 19:09

Totally agree, OP.

I would add that Harry's account will resonate with anyone who has experienced a toxic family dynamic from the inside.

Cherry60 · 16/01/2023 19:12

@Atethehalloweenchocs it's not the flakiness of the West Coast stuff I object to, it's the blatant insincerity, perfectly exemplified by PH when he insists that he loves his Father and Brother - while kicking them right in the teeth.

Canthave2manycats · 16/01/2023 19:12

Blossomtoes · 16/01/2023 18:57

There must be a scintilla of truth if they’re all saying the same thing, don’t you think?

I cannot believe that the service-driven Queen would have briefed against any member of her family? Plus anything of the sort would have reflected back on the whole family anyway? Seems counter-productive to me.

I also don't believe that William had an affair. I'm pretty sure it would have featured in the book. I'm pretty sure Pippa's daughter wouldn't have been given the same first name as a woman who'd done the dirty on her sister. Plenty of Harold's bad behaviour was covered up!

The thing too is, he's more or less confirmed a lot of the rumours! Can't imagine someone so malevolent who has betrayed his family to this extent wasn't doing his own negative briefings!

But then Saint Harold never does anything wrong. Everything is someone else's fault. Diana had two sons, but Harold is the one laying full claim to her memory. He's diabolical. This is nothing more than revenge because he didn't get his own way. He could have written a memoir and dedicated the proceeds wholly to charity but the two money-grabbers can never get enough.

Mandyjack · 16/01/2023 19:14

Well written and thought out post and agree with a lot of what you say. I do think she's ambitious but that doesn't mean she met him purely to boost her career.
After seeing the Netflix series it's obvious how much they love each other. People blame her for him leaving UK but for many years he's preferred to he away from the institution which I also agree is outdated. I don't feel it serves a purpose or that we benefit from it. I think we are sold the idea that they bring in money to keep them where they are.
Harry and Meghan are being used as scape goats to detract from Andrew and can completely understand why he's angry with his family. Meghan has been treated appallingly by the tabloids, especially the likes of Morgan and Wooton and sadly the public blindly believe a lot of what's written and are cruel with their comments.

Pointerdogsrule · 16/01/2023 19:15

NameChangeGin · 14/01/2023 22:08

Wow that's a long post! I read the first few sentences. Sounds like you're saying it's nicely written etc.. and trying to give a balanced view.

I don't care really what the comtent of the book is. The fact it's been written, gives personal details of his family without their consent, and puts down members of his family for the world to see, is enough for me to form an opinion.

The fact H&M have done countless interviews, are v hypocritical and H is massively undermining the monarchy, openly dissing the UK and our traditions. Again, that's enough for me to form an opinion.

My opinion is H&M have no morals, have sold their souls and are, in Harry's words, in bed with the devil. For what?

Hahahaha!

Christ, You didn't read all of OP's post but still wanted to comment on it. You haven't read the book but want to comment on it.....

Mandyjack · 16/01/2023 19:17

Mittens1717 · 16/01/2023 19:08

Exactly, money doesnt solve all of lifes problems I'm afraid

It certainly doesn't and living the sort of life they did, being bought up by Nannys, sent to boarding school and losing their Mother must've caused a lot of abandonment issues

Roussette · 16/01/2023 19:21

Cherry60 · 16/01/2023 19:12

@Atethehalloweenchocs it's not the flakiness of the West Coast stuff I object to, it's the blatant insincerity, perfectly exemplified by PH when he insists that he loves his Father and Brother - while kicking them right in the teeth.

You obviously haven't read the book. He didn't 'kick them in the teeth'

As others on here have said, he spoke very lovingly about his Dad, and despite not always seeing eye to eye with William, the same.

Roussette · 16/01/2023 19:24

He could have written a memoir and dedicated the proceeds wholly to charity but the two money-grabbers can never get enough

Random House say the profits from the book go to charity. So your slur calling them 'money grabbers' is incorrect.

Eyerollcentral · 16/01/2023 19:25

Roussette · 16/01/2023 19:24

He could have written a memoir and dedicated the proceeds wholly to charity but the two money-grabbers can never get enough

Random House say the profits from the book go to charity. So your slur calling them 'money grabbers' is incorrect.

Harry received his fee for writing the book. He didn’t do it for free??

Diynoidea · 16/01/2023 19:26

NameChangeGin · 14/01/2023 22:08

Wow that's a long post! I read the first few sentences. Sounds like you're saying it's nicely written etc.. and trying to give a balanced view.

I don't care really what the comtent of the book is. The fact it's been written, gives personal details of his family without their consent, and puts down members of his family for the world to see, is enough for me to form an opinion.

The fact H&M have done countless interviews, are v hypocritical and H is massively undermining the monarchy, openly dissing the UK and our traditions. Again, that's enough for me to form an opinion.

My opinion is H&M have no morals, have sold their souls and are, in Harry's words, in bed with the devil. For what?

💯

Liorae · 16/01/2023 19:27

and that the Queen had a bizarre momentary stand off with the Queen when he asked her permission to marry Meghan
Ok, you sound like you know what you are talking about.

Yrhengastan1962 · 16/01/2023 19:27

I've probably only got 20 odd years left to live if I'm lucky. I just don't have the time.

senua · 16/01/2023 19:27

he comes across as introspective and thoughtful but funny and bright ... I also think he’s a bit clueless and naive
Thoughtful but clueless? Hmm, OK.
I'm afraid I stopped reading your review after that.Grin

RedBea · 16/01/2023 19:32

Haven’t read it & probably won’t. But I agree the RF has traded stories to benefit themselves for years, unfortunately Meghan fell victim to this too. Anyone saying they “can’t defend themselves” of course they can they choose to never complain never explain. I have noticed a lot of people are leaking stories I’m guessing on behalf of the RF. In 2023 we will have a RF we pay for through our taxes. It’s so outdated.

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