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The royal family

The curtsy/curtsey

223 replies

Shewonticeskateorseesanta · 10/12/2022 21:20

Apologies if other threads on this, I haven’t noticed specifically about this.
Just watcher the H&M documentary (I’m a little behind)
What were your thoughts on the scene where Meghan describes the curtsey? I just found it uncomfortable watching Harry’s face, was she taking the piss?
Ive no opinion on them either way tbh, but must admit I’m interested in the relationship between them. He always looks so desperate to please/prove he’s doing things right…is this just love for her? Is there something off or am I reading too much into it?

OP posts:
ohfook · 11/12/2022 09:12

I don't understand the fuss. She was obviously taking the piss out of herself for not understanding how to behave in that situation.

If Harry was embarrassed it was probably at the thought that his gran made her family curtsy to them in private.

Sux2buthen · 11/12/2022 09:14

He was probably uncomfortable because he knew her every move in the interview would be picked apart online and 'misunderstood'.

CurlyhairedAssassin · 11/12/2022 09:16

I had occasion to go to the palace once and an aide type person demonstrated to us how to curtsy.

presumably you were visiting as a member of the public and not serious girlfriend of the queen’s grandson, though? I’m not sure it would be usual for an aide to inform partners of the royal family that they must curtsey, and how they should do it, wouldn’t that be seen as quite rude? In Meghan’s case the aide probably assumed that she already knew what to do if she was with Harry. Maybe the aide just said to her “the queen is ready to see you now” and she quickly asked “but what should I say, do I shake her hand and say hello?” And the aide quickly said “just give a quick curtsey and say X and then you’ll find she’ll do the talking and try to put you your ease.” As they’re walking along Harry coukd have been whispering “you know not to curtsey, right?” He may have assumed she’d seen footage of walkabouts with the public so seen people doing it.

there are all sorts of reasons why Harry looked annoyed. It could be that she was exaggerating the curtsey, for effect. To suggest how awkward she felt at not getting it quite right. Like we’ve all exaggerated details of anecdotes slightly when we have an audience, to make it more interesting and funny, while our partner rolls their eyes because they’ve heard it told loads of times and know you’re going a bit OTT with it.

or it could be that it suggested that Harry hadn’t prepped her enough. She could well have googled “what do you do when you meet the queen?” And found the answer to be “ladies should give a quick curtsey, men should bow. You should address her as blah blah blah…..”. Still doesn’t tell you what a curtsey is, and if the only curtsey you’ve seen is in plays or comedy shows or something then maybe you think you know what it is? Ballet dancers curtsey but with their arms out so the fact she’d done ballet is neither here nor there.

I didn’t read it as mocking the monarchy. She didn’t say “so I curtseyed, even though it seems funny to me to have to do that.”

interesting seeing everyone’s take on it though, demonstrates perfectly how when you’re in the public eye, no matter what you do, someone will pick faults in it. She also said, remember, that when she first had paparazzi following her when the story broke of her involvement with Harry, that she would smile at them, but then Harry told her to be careful how that appears to the world, because he knew that the media and some parts of the public would spin it as her loving the attention. If she’d just done a half smile not in their direction no doubt she would have been criticised somewhere for trying to copy the way his mother was when she was first followed. And if she’d ignored them completely she would have been portrayed as a stuck up bitch.

they can’t win. I have an open mind. I don’t know then but at least they’re speaking on camera for themselves. Unlike the “keep schtum” ridiculous stance of the RF.

Fieldfly · 11/12/2022 09:16

Notaninterestingfact- I would think that 100% of the planet who were about to meet the queen for the first time would say ‘what do I do?’. She was The Queen and m isn’t stupid (although evidence now suggests she has pretty serious other flaws which is disappointing as I was a big supporter of hers).
most people give their partners the low down before meeting their parents and grandparents ‘she likesxxx, don’t mention xxx to him, the dog will growl but he’s fine type thing’.

CurlyhairedAssassin · 11/12/2022 09:17

You know how to curtsey. Not “not”

EddieHowesBlackandWhiteArmy · 11/12/2022 09:19

From my perspective she was clearly taking the piss out of herself and her own ignorance in the situation and how wild it was that she was meeting the Queen without the faintest idea to go on because until then they’d been caught up in their own private love bubble where they were just Harry and Meg. Yes the fact he was a prince was of course known and the fact his grandma was the Queen was something she’ll have had an abstract awareness of but I completely understand why until that point it had occurred to neither of them to go through the etiquette stuff. Harry should have prepared her better and that’s on him, which I think in hindsight he probably realises. I don’t think it’s that outlandish though for Meghan to not have realised that you need to curtesy to your fellas Granny, even if she is the Queen, I’d definitely have thought that was all for ‘outside’ and not ‘inside’ the family.

CurlyhairedAssassin · 11/12/2022 09:19

But @Fieldfly , that could still have happened. Harry could have told her and in her head she thought she knew exactly what a curtsey was.

Fieldfly · 11/12/2022 09:27

curly - but it is a quick/ small curtesy and Harry should have been clear. And most people would then go ‘like this?’ and demonstrate, or if she thought he meant it was a full ballet curtesy and she thought it was as odd as she says she’d have expressed her surprise! And yes, Harry may well have looked uncomfortable because if it was true it was his fault and he is used to people bowing their heads to him and calling him ‘sir’ and ‘your royal highness’. Are we to believe that Megan had never heard anyone call him that?

DuchessOfPort · 11/12/2022 09:28

The real question is “did she hug her?”

because she’s a hugger, right?

Gooseysgirl · 11/12/2022 09:40

Cherryana · 10/12/2022 23:08

‘You did great’ - and then you saw the look of relief on her face and in the tone of her voice. She was saying how huge a deal that first meeting was and how unprepared she was. She had a perfectly normal reaction to the situation she was in and I find it so odd that people are trying to read everything she does and says with such a negative bias.

Exactly this!

Wishimaywishimight · 11/12/2022 09:46

I thought she looked quite foolish and silly and he looked embarrassed for her.

sunstoked · 11/12/2022 09:54

For those saying people are expressing vitriol, whatever Megan does is wrong or reading too much into things etc etc I dont see it. None of us know her, we have no idea what she is like as a person or what she actually meant by her curtesy comments, people are just expressing their views on a documentary. As this thread shows, the same clip/comment/look can be taken many different ways. If you choose to make a documentary about your life of course there will be talking points both good and bad that come out of it, but isn’t that the whole point? In that respect the documentary is a big success.

blueflagflyhigh · 11/12/2022 09:57

I think Harry was embarrassed because she was being so over the top and exaggerating what actually happened. I find it hard to believe that was the big slow curtsy that she did in reality.

I think she was taking the piss out the situation which it turn is disrespectful (whether she meant it to or not).

Mango101 · 11/12/2022 09:59

From the outside, they seem mismatched in personality and intelligence, rather an awkward relationship vibe. Hope I'm wrong and they're both happy together.

Bagsundermyeyestoday · 11/12/2022 10:04

I think she was taking the pi** out of herself and the whole scenario (definitely not the Queen)

Whatifthegrassisblue · 11/12/2022 10:09

PicturesOfDogs · 10/12/2022 22:31

Embarrassment doesn’t cause you to clench your jaw like that in my opinion.

People will see what they see though, I think it’s interesting how everyone can watch the same thing and get different impressions

Agree!! It's actually fascinating (and disturbing!)

bakalava · 11/12/2022 10:10

She demonstrated, in the space of ten seconds, why she was completely unsittable to marry a prince. Harry looked worried about the fact that she was creating legitimate grounds for criticism. It was probably more rehearsed than the original curtsey. She is not a great actress.

username8888 · 11/12/2022 10:14

She was talking in general about the institution she was getting into and how it (to an American) was outlandish and absurd (which it is) but it was her choice to enter it). She demonstrated her clumsy curtsy as though laughing at herself, but the whole overtone was mocking the Monarchy and it's outdated practices. Her total lack of respect for Harry's family, upbringing and his feelings said a lot about the dynamics of the couple. She is an arrogant woman trampling over her husbands upbringing.

Harry's discomfort was unimportant to her, and I think his mental health is taking a nosedive all round. He looked distraught at the airport and shellshocked. He is not in a good place and no amount of soft focus filming and girlish giggling is going to help him. I think we see now how well the RF protected him.

Whatifthegrassisblue · 11/12/2022 10:16

NotABeliever · 10/12/2022 23:04

I agree. I think she was mocking the mornachy, not herself for being unprepared.
No, I don't read the DM. I think this because of what she goes on to say afterwards, when she recalls Fergoe and Eugene telling her "you did great!". I don't see how that part can be interpreted as self-deprecating.

Funnily enough, I think she was mocking herself and then by them saying that, she was like oh maybe I pulled it off (she just said she had little warning this was going to happen, tbh even Harry saying you know how to curtsy right, made me think why didn't he prepare her a bit more. You don't know, what you don't know).

Judgyjudgy · 11/12/2022 10:19

Gooseysgirl · 11/12/2022 09:40

Exactly this!

Agree. I don't like her. But agree with this

bakalava · 11/12/2022 10:20

I don't buy it. They have their diehard fans as we encounter on here. They have their die hard critics (who have been proven justified on too many occasions). The doubts they create on purpose ('who said that about Archie?' 'Are they or aren't they making fun?' 'Did she or didn't she critcise Charlotte and make cry?' appeals to everyone in the middle (including the vast majority of the public who don't care about any of it).

AloysiaW · 11/12/2022 12:09

bakalava · 11/12/2022 10:10

She demonstrated, in the space of ten seconds, why she was completely unsittable to marry a prince. Harry looked worried about the fact that she was creating legitimate grounds for criticism. It was probably more rehearsed than the original curtsey. She is not a great actress.

This is it ☝
Although actually if you take it out of context her netflix pantomime curtsey was very funny imo, love how she drops her hands at the very end 😂
I don't understand people wanting the curtsey in private to be abolished, what is it to them? Every family has rules and customs, as children we used to do little bows and bobs to show respect for ancient titled people, so what? No one goes around telling what you can and can't do in private in your family, it's the same thing.
In any case no one was ever beheaded for not curtseying to the Queen. She wanted to curtsey and make a good impression at the time but now she's playing to her public, it's quite vulgar.

Notaninterestingfact · 11/12/2022 13:41

OLP2019 · 11/12/2022 07:16

Im sorry but the idea that anyone would meet the queen without any kind of briefing or heads up on what to expect is such bullshit ! And if Harry gave her absolutely no heads up on what to expect then a lot of this is on him to be fair - he would have known what was expected so why couldn't he help her prepare for it ? The idea that it was all out of the blue is just ridiculous

If you look at the image when she's saying that H (aitch) said 'oh my grandmother is here', it shows an image of the castle with the flag flying. I believe it's a thing that the flag only flies when the Queen/King is there. It might have been a case that Aitch didn't actually know that she was going to be there until he saw the flag.

Rockybooboo · 11/12/2022 14:20

tabulahrasa · 10/12/2022 22:15

I’m a grown ass woman and British... and before all this I totally would have assumed the total family were more relaxed in private.

Yes that surprised me. They must spend of Christmas bowing to each other.

Sweetpeasaremadeforbees · 11/12/2022 14:38

I don't know whether she was mocking the Queen or not, I'm not sure that the RF will care particularly but I did think Harry's reaction was strange and the director must have thought the same because they seemed to zoom in on it. No idea what he (H) was thinking.

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