Feeling sorry for the Duchess of Sussex

[8AndGreat]

It must be so surreal for her to be caught in everything that is happening at the moment. I know H&M are controversial to say the least but they came here to do a feel good tour and are now caught up in everything that's going on. If I were Meghan, I'd travel back to the US to be with my dc and leave Harry with trusted family and aids. It was odd that the Sussexes said they'd both travel to Balmoral and the media now say that King Charles said that Meghan wouldn't be welcome. I can understand why as only close family attendee's Balmoral.

To sum it up, I feel sorry for both Harry and Meghan, I think they are out of their depth. Their autobiography will be interesting.

Whatever anyone may think of Andrew, his mum has just died. He had a right to be there. She loved him very much despite all that he did, which just goes to show the Queen's capacity for love. I don't doubt that he loved his mum - one can do a very wrong thing without stopping loving or being loved by your mum.

It would have been inappropriate for Meghan to be there. The Queen's grandchildren weren't even there, with the exception of William and Harry. Neither was Princess Anne's husband. Only the partners of her children were there, not grandchildren.

Meghan and Harry have chosen not to be part of the working Royal family. No-one made them do it, it was their choice. Charles has shown he respects that in his speech last night.

I liked Harry and Meghan. Until Oprah. I feel sorry for Harry that he has lost his grandmother, but I feel equally sorry for Peter, Zara, Louise and his other cousins.

Regarding Meghan not travelling to Balmoral, I’m pretty sure if someone posted on AIBU to say “Our granny is on her death bed. One grandson wants to bring his wife who has been gossiping about the family behind their backs and the rest of us don’t want her there right now.” there would be a resounding “YANBU!”

👏👏👏👏👏👏

As PPs have said, she’s made her bed, now she has to lie in it.

All she’s ever done is play the victim and tell lies. She clearly sold herself as some kind of abandoned child to PH, saying the royals were ‘the family she never had’ and then cutting her dad off to fit the narrative. And, I suspect, because he’s overweight and not the most polished and camera-friendly of people.

Then the bizarre, snotty statements she put out in a bid to buck tradition - saying she would ‘celebrate privately’ after Archie’s birth, refusing to share the place of birth or the hospital, refusing to let the paps take a few photos and instead insisting on that incredibly awkward and ridiculous red carpet walk at Windsor Castle. I think a lot of public goodwill evaporated when it became clear she wanted the status and money without ‘giving back’ to them.

She seemed to loathe anything British - she never wore British fashion designers, always sticking with American couture (paid for by us of course). She never said anything positive about the country, or wanted to get stuck in learning about it by going to the less glamorous parts. It always seemed to be shiny fashion events or cute animals in London. She had zero intention of doing the boring ribbon cutting or factory tours that is basically the royals’ job.

Then leaving after 18 months with yet another snotty statement without clearing their plans with the Queen; who was totally blindsided and put out a statement to this effect.

Thats not even starting on the accusations that have followed, which seem to be very economical with the truth. Saying they wouldn’t let her see a counsellor, really? Why didn’t Harry just book one and arrange for them to meet at Frogmore?

So no, I don’t like her, and now she has to live with her actions. I don’t think she ever intended to be a working royal. I think it was all about elevating her status for her inevitable return to the USA having swallowed up £££ of our money in the process and putting two fingers up at DH w public. Now she’s back and realised that all Hollywood is interested in is her ‘anecdotes’, rather than her philanthropical genius or acting skills. So she’s selling them out for every penny knowing they can’t really address what she says due to their code of conduct.

🤷🏼‍♀️ I don’t care if she’s upset.

I find it totally bizarre that she was going to go up to balmoral.

If someone married my grandson, then repeatedly slagged me and my family off to the whole world and then appeared at my deathbed, I wouldn’t be too happy about it.

She clearly feels she has been treated very badly and I suppose it’s her right to talk about that but she can’t then expect to be welcomed by the royal family. She can’t have it both ways.

And had the bravery to leave the firm.

Andrew should definitely be on some kind of "shit-list" - as a pp so eloquently put it - but the Queen was his mum so the idea that he should make a dash to her deathbed is not unreasonable. I suspect that with her death and without her patronage the paedo prince will find himself fully erased from the picture. I love @mum2bee2022's imagined scenario and look forward to seeing how Meghan manges to make the Queen's death all about her in its retelling for Netflix. I thought the King's reference to "Harry and Meghan" (with no titles) was a masterstroke, along with the phrase "as they continue to build their lives overseas". They are off the books through choice - the RF can continue to love them at no extra cost. In dying so unexpectedly, the Queen appears to have unleashed a tidal wave of Royalism and I think H&M's attempts to snipe from the sidelines will sit very badly in the current climate.

Regardless of the reasons why Meghan has felt justified in sharing details of private moments, and worse, her memory of them rather than anything more measured, the reality is she has. No-one who is with her now has any privacy. For me, this would mean I want no interaction with her again. Of course people don't want her at things, it would be like having a recording device at every conversation. The family want to grieve in private and Meghan would not have allowed them to do that. Just as she does not allow them to do anything else in private nowadays. I do think the press treat her badly, but I also think she is now bullying the royal family. Who I do not support at all as an institution. It's a shit show all round. Just like watching Jeremy Kyle for the upper classes.

I think that it is worth pointing out that H&M have previous form for announcing what they are going to do in the press before telling everyone and then expecting everyone to go just go with it.

I am wondering how long it will be before H&M's 'truth' about this gets 'leaked' to her mouthpiece.

Isn't there a term for somebody who deliberately isolates another person from their family for their own personal and financial gain. I'm sure I've seen it a thousand times on this site, it's just slipped my mind for a moment. 🤔

Harry has essentially married his mother. Both Diana and Meghan married into the royal family with expectations of what it would be like but struggled. But for Diana her marriage was weak and whilst Charles remained within the royal family and divorced Diana. Meghan and Harry have a stronger marriage and decided to leave the firm as the lifestyle was not for them, which is fine. I do not have a problem with that.

What I have a problem with is the mudslinging and accusations, some false to support their arguments, using seemingly respected media channels. If Diana was around at the right time I could see her spilling her guts out to Oprah Winfrey. All this combined with a well known hatred of media. They pick and choose when then want to use the media for their own purposes. I just find them self absorbed and a two faced.

But absolutely right than Meghan did not travel to Balmoral. If she (or they) had a shred of emotional intelligence they would see how inappropriate that was.

I never feel sorry for the Duchess of Sussex. They keep saying they want to be out of the limelight, and yet keep thrusting themselves into it. She is very damaging and I wish she'd just bugger off.

Bloody hell!

Yes I feel sorry for her because this ^^ is what she has to put up with.

The queen's death was significant and it was sad, but the Royal Family as an institution needs to buried with her. I mean, how dare H & M try and build a more normal life for themselves and their family?

And before people jump on me by saying they aren't living a "normal" life, neither is are the thousands of rock stars, film stars, "celebrities" etc. but no one is a fucked up as the Royals are. And we're supposed to respect these people as their "subjects"?! Pathetic.

I do feel sorry for Harry. I find it painful to see his actions since leaving the Royal Family. I feel like I am watching deep unresolved trauma being played out.

I really feel that is what is behind his actions. He seems to have very painful feelings and a lot of anger and blame at the royal family and everything that meant for his mother and him.

I feel deeply sorry for him.

TBH it’s the only reason I feel the royal family should be abolished. I just think it’s deeply unfair on those born into it.

It's not because he's white and male, it's because it's his mum's funeral?

They are irrelevant to most of what's going on. They effectively abdicated, made it clear they wanted to be private citizens and leave, and were supported to do so. H was relevant at Balmoral as Andrew's daughters were in that its their grandmother and his father, M was not relevant or necessary in any way and that was neither the time nor place for them to be adding complications and drama.

It makes me laugh you talk like u know her personally, I'm sure people just love to hate her. And I mean spend time just banging on about how awful she is. It's become a bizarre pastime people have now! Actively search out posts and comments to talk about how awful she is.

@Nonews exactly how I feel too

if someone who had been bitching about me turned up at my deathbed I would be furious. She had no right to be there after the way she has behaved.

Why is that then? Because we women are not allowed to have our own opinion, have to say what you think they should say and praise every woman regardless of what they say or do?

I think the Sussex children are in the States. I don't think the Cambridge children attended Phillip's funeral but obviously the Queen's funeral will be a bigger, more public affair. It's completely different to lose a very elderly great-grandmother than losing your mother in a sudden accident though.

I agree.

None of the other grandchildren were there other than William

• Peter and Zara Phillips, Beatrice and Eugenie, Louise and James.

Did Harry think because his father was now King he should be there ?

Harry ( and Megan ) could have visited the Queen before she died as she had graciously invited them to Balmoral.
Actions have consequences.

In all fairness, I don't think the Queen died to spite MM and spoil her great time in Britain.
I initially sympathised with MM, being a republican and considering the concept of aristocracy a very outdated concept but I changed my mind as she kept drawing attention to herself and creating scandals where there were none or definitely not as big as she made them in public.
She wants to be everything about her. She bagged herself a prince, a second son so she doesn't need to be in the country and stick to the traditions, she wanted to create a MH brand but it's difficult because it's hard to manipulate someone who's clearly not 100% buying into it. Harry isn't the smartest cookie in the jar and has always relished being the second one - little pressure, lots of privilege and freedom and a huge tolerance for the occasional outrageous behaviour. You need two to make a brand, especially one that's based on the aristocratic title, being a prince and all the glitter that surrounds it.
I feel sorry for their children because they will always be used by MM as props, especially now that they have the titles. I have a very tiny bit of sympathy for Harry because he's being manipulated by a very clever narcissist who is far smarter than him.

Those saying "what about Andrew"....

We know about Andrew. No one likes him. But I don't see why he shouldn't have gone. His mother had just died. Some people seemed to Think he should have been banished??

It must be so surreal for her to be caught in everything that is happening at the moment. I know H&M are controversial to say the least but they came here to do a feel good tour and are now caught up in everything that's going on.

Oh Diddums, they wanted to do nice, enjiyable, happy stuff and instead Harry's Grandmother had the temerity to die. And they are now into all the messy nuisance stuff like mourning and reflecting on 97 years of duty and selflessness (do they know what that's all about?)

It was all a vicious plan, you know, hatched by Harry's wicked family to take the attention away from Harry and Meghan, how very dare they, they're so cruel.

Hold your sympathy, OP, it really isn't needed.