A positive and non-bashing thread about Meghan and Harry

[MrsMaxDeWinter]

I have rejoined Mumsnet after leaving a few times. The first time I left was because I was concerned about the coverage and uncomfortable undertone of the commentary on Meghan Markle after the engagement was announced, before she had said a word, and before she had married into the Royal Family.

I came back around the time she and Harry left the UK, to be stunned by the pages and pages upon pages of virulent threads. At that time Mumsnet actually banned all threads about Meghan, it had become so toxic.

They have now made their lives in Montecito, but still the virulence continues. Yes, she speaks in a mix of therapy plus corporate gobbledegook, yes, she is occasionally vapid and irritating.

But who is she actually harming that she deserves all this virulence?

Yesterday, when the new UK Prime Minister was elected, the coverage in the Super Tory Daily Mail was all about a seven minute speech to a bunch of young people. Article after article after article. Body language experts. Counting the number of times she said "I" in a speech in which she sought to inspire young people by attempting to relate to them. Before that, 18 articles were devoted to the first podcast by the Daily Mail alone. 18!

Same with her podcasts. The series is about HER and HER take on labels, and she discusses HER take with HER guests.

It's all very anodyne, even vanilla. It does not deserve any of the vitriol sent her way.

SO:

As the next twelve weeks are going to be wall to wall Meghan, and the Meghan haters and detractors have several threads here that fill up rapidly with bile, scorn and mockery, I have started this thread, reminiscent of previous " positive" threads, to talk about what some of us like, enjoy, find amusing and even (gasp) admire, in the next few Meghan rich weeks.

If you don't have anything positive to say, that's okay, you can keep to the existing threads.

Looking forward to a bile-free discussion of everything Meghan!

MM is dual heritage. Her father is a white man let that sink in......

We are no longer living in the 70s. The world has moved along and people are entitled to date whatever background, culture and race of human of their choice.

It’s very simple really. She’s a liar and hypocrite.

She’s allowed by posters like you to be human and inconsistent and flawed and complicated yet you don’t have the decency to extend that courtesy to other members of the royal family who have made complicated and flawed and inconsistent decisions in the last 30 or 40 years. Everything you present is through the lens of Meghan good and allowable, RF bad. Can you demonstrate equally strong support of say Camilla who has had a complicated and flawed life?

Meghan never particularly traded on her “biracial African American cultural history” until it became her ace card in her vitriol against Britain and the media and the RF. it certainly wasn’t a key part of her blog The Tig which reflected her life and values.

@Day20 and your point is? I would have no issue with her using her while American fathers titles and dukedoms given she is dual heritage. But no, being a plain biracial African American wasn’t what she wanted was it?

as African American cultural is used as THE reason why Meghan was truthful and honest and true to her roots about her real marriage to Harry really being the rehearsal in her back yard three days before in the uk ie she didn’t lie in the OW interview, I would expect her to have respected more than that convenient norm in her ongoing life.

clearly it isn’t so it’s just a very weak excuse by her supporters to try and excuse the fact she is a bare faced liar

This is where you are absolutely wrong - I very much view all members of the Royal Family as complex people who are as equally flawed as Meghan. I however have real issues with the RF as an institution. I feel that Camilla and Charles loved each other very much and behaved reprehensibly to their spouses and their families. I think that Camilla has worked hard to rehabilitate her image as the other woman (even though she was there first).

It is very interesting - I have described something quite negative about Meghan - I almost hesitated to post it because this is a positive thread about H&M and you somehow have interpreted it me as saying Meghan is good.

You have also side stepped the point when discussing her cultural background (American, Biracial) to then criticise her for using the proverbial race card (a term frequently used in an effort to devalue and minimise claims of racism) against the RF and the UK - very much ignoring the many people of colour who have said that racism in those very institutions most definitely exists. There are many threads about these 2 which posters discuss why Meghan’s experiences of race were different in the 2 different countries .

I’m also at a loss as to why a lifestyle blog would primarily be focussing on issues of race. I follow many POC lifestyle creators - it’s how I’ve got into rendering my own tallow and home preservation - very rarely is race discussed if at all. So again - this criticism is unwarranted.

Back to positivity - I thought the walkabout was wonderful and was the right call by William. I don’t understand the modern royal obsession with sky high heels - looking at the footage of HMQ over the past few days - you can see she was always in a pair of sensible heels. The poor ladies feet. Catherine looked very poised - I have to applaud Meghan though - she looked very anxious, hesitant and unsure but she put one foot in front of the other and did it. Especially with the never ending onslaught of negative commentary about her - to come out regardless was something I don’t think most people could do.

I wonder if the short time W and H were (forced?) to share together at Balmoral allowed some one to one face time which broke the ice?

Also I would imagine they will have to cooperate and cross paths a lot this week in any rehearsals, briefings etc ahead of the funeral.

They did all made a brave and courageous effort for the public and for their grandmothers memory by doing the walk about.

Its a step in the right direction. No one is asking for anything more than polite and civil behaviour in public. The frosty, hostility wasn’t there.

I agree. I did notice Meghan focused on babies/children/dogs however, avoiding interaction with adults as much as possible .When she did interact with adults she talked to individuals rather than moving on to speak to as many people as possible. Fair play to her though. She did it. For once the painted grin was gone and she seemed human. It’s a step in the right direction.

I agree about the high heels

I think it was a masterstroke by all 4 of them & whose idea it was. It’s stops the media speculation instantly & they can instead concentrate on giving the Queen a good send off. A united family in grief is better for them to be able to come together.

I hope this is a step in the right direction for them all. It’s clear from what the King said that the Sussexes lives will be in the US. They are not working royals but that doesn’t mean they aren’t family.

It’s very simple really. She’s a liar and hypocrite.

So what though? Do you think she's any different from other royals or celebs? I really don't understand why she is singled out for so much criticism.

I feel that Camilla and Charles loved each other very much and behaved reprehensibly to their spouses and their families.

To be fair to Camilla, her own husband (Andrew Parker Bowles) had behaved reprehensibly towards her since the very start of her marriage. If you feel sorry for Diana and excuse all her subsequent affairs you should also likewise extend sympathy to Camilla. Who knows what would have happened if her marriage had been happy?

Back to the unexpected joint appearance last night I also thought it was a master stroke by William because it lanced the boil that was the “what will it be like when the brothers/the couples finally have to appear together?” speculation that we all know the press would have been all over in the week leading up to the funeral. One small action now and that question has been answered, and the focus can be back on the Queen’s life and her funeral arrangements. Well played, William.

I'm not from the UK.

I am sorry but I don't believe for a moment with all of the preparations and formalities around the global event that was their wedding, that she was unsure which was the legal ceremony.

“what will it be like when the brothers/the couples finally have to appear together?”

It was a great idea also because now less people will be surprised when Meghan travels to the abbey with Camilla and/or Kate. The pairings will depend if William and Kate take any of the children to the funeral, and if so how many, but I fully expect that if none of the children go the three women will travel together as the men (plus at least Princess Anne, if not some of the granddaughters) will walk to the abbey behind the coffin.

William made a very canny choice here. As others have pointed out, after the queens death and this gesture of generosity, theres no way M will be able to trash talk the RF after the funeral.
Theres just one problem though, which is Harry's book. I have no doubt theres stuff in there that's extremely close to the bone, and what might have felt risqué while the queen was alive, risks reflecting so, so badly on him now she is gone.
But it's way too far along now to pull out the process. If I were H I'd be shitting myself right now.

I think the only one of the kids to go should be George. The others are too young, plus he's the heir.

why shouldn't people defend her. its a positive thread.

I did too. I have not shed tears over the Queen, because despite knowing her dedication to duty, I feel she had the best end to her life ever. She was in the place she loved and up on her feet and smiling just a day before. How we would wish for that for all our loved ones!

However, I did feel quite tearful seeing the 4 of them walking amongst the flowers. I suppose it was like seeing them as young boys doing the same for their Mother.

And thinking... this is the end of an era.

Thank you @skullbabe for your measured and very informative posts.

Exactly. And maybe the poster should realise that some posters on here live in different parts of the world with time differences!
I'm an insomniac usually always awake between 5.30 and 6am. I slept on till gone 8 this morning... unheard of... and nothing to do with the tequila shots I had late last night!

There is a story circulating in some media circles that H and M were planning their own walkabout and had alerted favoured media .
HM got wind and asked ( ordered) W to invite H and M to accompany him and C .
It would help to explain why M was perfectly dressed , coiffed and made up if the invitation was so last minute .
It was good to see the brothers together however it knocked Charles’s Proclamation off the front pages !

They should be able to defend on any thread not just a positive one.

I’ve been critical of H&M before but yesterdays walkabout took guts so good for them.

They are a family at the end of the day with all the dynamics of any other family.

People say the royals are dysfunctional I just see a family the same as mine albeit wity disagreements or squabbling blown up by the worlds media.

The main story circulating is that William organised it and inviting Harry and Meghan to join them. I've not seen the one you quote and it sounds like spiteful nonsense. My thought was that Charles had a hand in suggesting this to show a united front.

Given the walkabouts at Balmoral, Windsor and the Mall all ran one after the other they were all clearly coordinated

I can't imagine that being the case. I agree with a PP Meghan looked unsure of herself and didn't look confident.
However, it would be a corker of a story for some of the rags to make up and get people frothing over (that is not directed at you Reading, I am just talking in general)

Can I ask Reading whether your name means you are looking at a book in the sun, or in Berkshire because every time I reply to you, I say your name in my head both ways!

They are a family at the end of the day

Who are also public entities that we pay a lot of money for, so there is always that...