Your cats real names vs the names you actually call them...

[JorisBonson]

I'll start -

Toulouse - Monster/monst, Mr Pants, Toots, Tooten Frooten, my angel child, handsomest boy, the lad.

Roxy - Mrs. Girl, sweet face, Otterly Totterly, Ricky, Ricardo, Wiggles.

Lincoln - Link, Bink, Binkon, BingBong, Mr Chumby Tumby, Croissant, Tubby Tumpkin, BingleBongle, Fatso (they get told off for this one!)

Luna - Looney, Booney, Boonage, BooBoo, Poony, The Dark One, Gloria,

Previous cat was known affectionately as The Vomiting Cavalier.

Cuthbert aka pissy pants.
Dillon aka dark destroyer/ mr inscrutable
Fat Sam aka beast of Bodmin/black panther
Arfer aka witchy
Tango aka tank and argh you f....
Cash aka littlest hobo.

Mrs cat has always been known as Mrs cat and always will be.

Mavis aka utter knob head

Charlie - Charles, Chubb's, Baby.
Georgie - George, ginger George, Ginge, ginger cat, dickhead
Penny - Penn, Baby, Sweetie.
Harley - Har and Feral
Salem - just Salem

Dogs
Dottie - Dots
Alfie - Alfred, Alf

My husband refers to our two as Fatso and Poo Monster. He loves them really.

Jake. Called Jake, possibly Jakie baby. But mostly doesn't get called anything, just gets cuddles

the dog on the other hand gets every name under the sun, both good and bad

The Naming of Cats is a difficult matter,
It isn’t just one of your holiday games;
You may think at first I’m as mad as a hatter
When I tell you, a cat must have THREE DIFFERENT NAMES.
First of all, there’s the name that the family use daily,
Such as Peter, Augustus, Alonzo, or James,
Such as Victor or Jonathan, George or Bill Bailey—
All of them sensible everyday names.
There are fancier names if you think they sound sweeter,
Some for the gentlemen, some for the dames:
Such as Plato, Admetus, Electra, Demeter—
But all of them sensible everyday names,
But I tell you, a cat needs a name that’s particular,
A name that’s peculiar, and more dignified,
Else how can he keep up his tail perpendicular,
Or spread out his whiskers, or cherish his pride?
Of names of this kind, I can give you a quorum,
Such as Munkustrap, Quaxo, or Coricopat,
Such as Bombalurina, or else Jellylorum—
Names that never belong to more than one cat.
But above and beyond there’s still one name left over,
And that is the name that you never will guess;
The name that no human research can discover—
But THE CAT HIMSELF KNOWS, and will never confess.
When you notice a cat in profound meditation,
The reason, I tell you, is always the same:
His mind is engaged in a rapt contemplation
Of the thought, of the thought, of the thought of his name:
His ineffable effable
Effanineffable
Deep and inscrutable singular name.

Real name - Batman. We call her Fatman/Fatty, because she is.

Real name - Yoda. We call her Wiggles/Wiggly Wiggly, because she does that tail wiggle all the time.

Chester- pumpkin, pumpernickel, big boy, fatty, chest, chesty
Maggie- Mags, Magmag, rat tail

Real name Roxie - called: Roxie Loxie, Roxanne, Roxette, Rox, Roxetta and Oi You Stop That!

Her given name is Kiki. I also call her Keeks and Kiki Dee but she is only 5 months old, so imagine there will be many more nicknames to come.

Biba: Bibbs, Bibsy Wibsy, Bibba, Mrs Cat, Big Paws

My 2 boys were Maurice & Raymon (hairdresser cats), but we ended up calling them Fatty & Skinny.

Joey
....
JoJo

Fry, aka: Fryboy, Frybe (rhymes with bribe) baby boy, icckle man

Willow, aka: Willow or ‘You little bastard’when she shits in the kitchen.

Sausage - swassage pape de Neuf, sossiewanna, sosij, sosage. Answers to all of them with much enthusiasm.

Spaghetti legs - spagga, spags, fattel spags.

Sophie - sofa, soooooooooopheeeee

Martin - martian, Prince fluffy pants, I have Martin from accounts on line one.

Frank - frankel, frankie.

Joni
She gets Jones the Bootmaker. Or shit bag

My old cat Jemima I used to call Joojoobe as well. Love a good nickname for a cat.

Woody is MrMcWoodford
Rosie is SexyMcLadybum
Tabitha is CutieMcFluffybutt
Kloppy is Chunky McChunkybum

Magic; Snorg, Snorg Maiden, or magymoo. Or bootiful princess.

Cheddar is Cheds, Cheddy. Gorgeous little pudding. Or you are a pain in the bum.

Eduardo De la Spoon / fat boy / fat cat / DJ Spoony / Eddie. Real name: Spook

Brennie-Lou / Twat Cat / Adelweiss. Real name: Brenda

I realise I'm very odd

Real name Akira - Aki, Kira, baby G'bee, Aki bee bee, g'boo, the baby, skitten
Real name Tao - stinkertao, wheezy tree beever, treezee wee beever,

Maddie - Moo, Boo Boo, Princess, chonka

Felix - Flixicals, Flixy, puppy (not as weird as it sounds, he is definitely a dog cat), Handsome

Leroy RoRoBerry PinklePurr (Leroy)

AKA

Robers, RoBeeRo, Lolly, Lollister, Fatboy, Fatroy, Booful, Mr Woffy Tail, BFB (Big Furry Bloomers), Who-da-ma-foo, etc.

He only responds to Leroy though, almost like it's his actual name 🤷🏼‍♀️