Your cats real names vs the names you actually call them...

[JorisBonson]

I'll start -

Toulouse - Monster/monst, Mr Pants, Toots, Tooten Frooten, my angel child, handsomest boy, the lad.

Roxy - Mrs. Girl, sweet face, Otterly Totterly, Ricky, Ricardo, Wiggles.

Boy cat - Chief Pest
Girl cat - Assistant Pest

Millie - Millster, Pisspot, Weirdo , MillieMoo

Fred..... Fredosaurus, Fredricko, Mr Fred on the bed, best boy, big lad.
Eve..... Evil Eve, Evelyn, Evelicious.
Luna..... Looney, Lou Lou, Miss Loons, Looney Tunes.
Annie....Annie-Panny, Annie-Pants
And the dog...
Teal.... Teapot, Tulip, Poppet, little Dot, Tealy Two, Tea Leaf.

Colin...... Col Col, where are you ( he comes running to this), fuckwit cat, bubby, bub bub, furry fella

There must be more

Tom aka Pussscat, The Cat, Tom Puss Kitty Cat, Fatty Catty

Bertie; Bengal, Boy.

Bertram if naughty.

Sunday Cat - Squishy, Squish Mish, Wriggle, Princess Fluff Muff, Princess Fluff Mittens, Stinky Kaplinki, Bitey Bugger, Princesse, Mon Amour

@JorisBonson

I'll start -

Toulouse - Monster/monst, Mr Pants, Toots, Tooten Frooten, my angel child, handsomest boy, the lad.

Roxy - Mrs. Girl, sweet face, Otterly Totterly, Ricky, Ricardo, Wiggles.

My actual cat is called Tootsie

She gets called

Toots
Toos
Toosies
Boo boo
Oi you little shit

Kai - little Legs, Pumpkin, Cutie-Pie, Pickle

Simba (RIP) only had one alternative name which was Mr Handsome Cat. He really was my soul cat.

Foxtrot Oscar Wilde - known as Oscar (obvs!), O'Scarface, Scarface, Scarface Halfear (his Orc name), and FatCat. Yes, he's an outdoor cat with a penchant for coming home with facial injuries - we know not how or why he gets them, they don't seem to bother him and heal quickly and well - but they're frequent - hence the names!

Dolly = Doll Face, 🎶Hello Dolly🎶, Doll, Sweetie, STOP DOLLY, (when she decides to start clattering around in the middle of the night)

Bertie = Bert (spoken in a very gruff voice), Bertram, Pissy Pants, Mr Grubb

Both of mine were called FOR FUCKS SAKE this morning while they merrily chased a freshly caught mouse around.

(Mousey found his way into a shoebox with a hole in it and was released back into the wild. The best tip I've ever got from MN!)

Layla - Layla Payla, LL Cool Beans, Little Cat, stinking kitten, kitten cat, Layleen.

Toby - Tobermory, Woby, Tobias, Tubby, Tibbles, Tobias kitten, Tubble.

Purrlock - Purrlockian, Mr Purrlock, Fatty, Fatty Gonzalez, Purrlock von Lurrlock, Mr Gonzalez.

Current cat Arthur.
Aka:

When nice:
Arturo
Pussy Cat
Michou (phenotically spelled Italian for Pussy Cat)
Michinou (same but for little Pussy Cat)

When horrible:
Arsehole
Bastard
Fuckwit

Ivy - Ivycat, big cat, Mrs cat, skinny tail, fusspot, baby girl, ivy bear, bear cat

Betsy - Betsy boo, Betsy boo bear, boo bear, kitten bear, squirrel (she has a huge fluffy tail), miss cat, baby cat, small cat, stinky paws.

Sherlock: bestest boy, our lad, gingery-woo, sherls,

Percy: parsley, persil, parcel, fatty,

Betty AKA

Killer predator BetBoo Betbet
chickybins ratbag fluffypantaloons
Girlygirl git booboo boo bettyboo
Possum sheees a yummy girl

Rogelio - Roro, Badger, puss puss

Charlie- Charlie Boots, Mr Boots, Wanker, Chawee Boowets, Mr Biscuit.

Ours is:

Lady Miaowington
Poppet
Pops
Bobbin
Bob
Baba
Madame-Madame (always in a cod French accent)
Monkey
Small

Her actual name is nothing like any of these.

Rosie - Rosie-Bosie, bastard face ( I adore her, she tolerates me)

Bert - Bertram Bumfluff, Boo, Bertywertywoo.

Love these.

Dearly departed Lazlo - Azbo Lazbo. Count Laz, lazy Boy, Hoosband (christened my cat husband by tiny DD), Lazchops, Booful. He's under a Philadelphus in the garden but I see him out of the corner of my eye most days.

Nancy - NancyPants Pudden n Pie.

Cecelia - Ceceboo, Cecily Nevilly, Cece.

Purrsephone - Percy, Percypants, P Cat, PerkyPoo, PoicyBoycie.

Poppy - Meow Girl, Floofer, Brat Cat, Popsicle, Kitty (pronounced Kiddy), Cuteness

Current cat is Rufus - Roofy - Mr Stinky

Previous cat who was ginger was Tiger but usually referred to as Golden Balls or just Golden

Sniffy - Lord Sniffy of Sniffington, East Sniffwich, Snifftown. Deadly nightshade, deadly lampshade.