The Further Adventures Of Newboy

[RubbishMantra]

I don't think anyone's begun a new thread yet?

Hope you don't mind Cozie. Newboy's Fairy God(cat)mothers love hearing about his progress.

It sounds like it!!!

It did! I would have liked an expression of gratitude but, sadly, it's not to be I reckon. He seems to bring new meaning to the definition of 'entitled'.

He's a Siamese boy everything must be to his standards obviously!
I got told off the other day for letting go of a paw, only because my arm was going numb

He made a special trip to thank the kitchen and staff! What a gent.

I threatened Dbro with a calendar for Xmas 'unless you spend some money on me for once and remember my birthday'.

Sent a dick pic of Mr C by way of illustration.

This arrived.

He is talking to you now, bravely, so timidly asking for MORE. Just like Oliver Twist at Xmas, sniff, wipe away a tear.

I'm not sure Oliver stormed into the workhouse boss' bedroom, yowled a command for a third lavish feast and stalked back to his own heated luxury suite, however.

Is that a new iPhone? Damn right.

I don't remember Lightly Warmed gruel for the orphans in the film either :)

I am approaching the not lightly warmed igloo with eye drops behind my back
May need a cup of tea to recuperate afterwards

Ah......But the point of an LWT is that you don't have to heat his room, Lana. (Not unless you want to.) It dials down the guilt.

If Ollie has taken possession of the igloo, does this mean you've got the Hedwig cushion back?

If you have to type a response with your nose or use voice commands, we'll know the eye drops went badly.

I do have Hedwig back! The eye drops are in. He's squinting more and looking at me in disgust with one eye

It is Fluffy, 32 gb of purring, kitten-y gorgeousness.

DBro is not getting a calendar now, but that's only because since it's been made I decided it will be too good for him.

I think Newboy sees you as finally partially trained, so he can ease off on the constant demands cosie. You have passed your probationary period.
Wonder how olivander 's neglected orphans are coping with the cold snap Lana ?
Maybe they're cuddled up together for warmth, sharing an ice cold, plague ridden, days old rat corpse for sustenance?

Balls was sat on the dustbin spitting at another cat so he appears as normal as usual
Paws was glimpsed sat inside his OWN cosy home, looking out the balcony doors
The feral kittens are probably still plotting how to kill humans, I'll check on them tomorrow when I go to ride the horse

It's a terrifying thought, really Dickensian in echoes of misery. December is with us now.

Paws will be selling matches, hoping for a worn farthing from a kind passer-by to rub between her chilblain-ed toe beans; Paws with Balls (assuming they haven't been frozen off) will be sent up chimneys to clean them out with his own lovely tail, and descend soaked in icy water, covered in smuts.

All they've got is each other to cling to in the dark, on the cold hard bare earth. Under Ollivander's window.

Ollivander's closed window.

Little bit of a cross-post there

Paws will end up with phossy jaw.
Paws with balls will have soot wart.
It's terrible that in this day and age, innocent cats will end up with these terrible industrial diseases, just trying to keep themselves in Dreemies.
Will nobody think of the kitties?

A whole rat corpse, Weeds? I rather thought that they would be on leftovers.

You could be right cosie an entire rat is probably an unimaginable luxury for the poor waifs.
Maybe sharing a spider between two? Or a couple of woodlice?
Either way it's a hard, miserable life.
They may have to consider the workhouse soon

Weeds soot wart

Dickens loved cats, one of the few redeeming features of his very peculiar personality. His favourite, Edward, used to slap the pen out of his hand when he was writing. Praised as a fine tom, Edward got away with murder to the fury of the servants, stole food, grew horribly fat and then had 6 huge kittens on Dickens' bed.

'Edward'??

The housekeper complained about that too.